


A Treasure Incidentally Found

by Arionrhod, McKay



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-03
Updated: 2017-05-03
Packaged: 2018-10-27 17:56:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 45,702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10813914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arionrhod/pseuds/Arionrhod, https://archiveofourown.org/users/McKay/pseuds/McKay
Summary: Severus is content with his life as a respected folklore specialist until he finds himself attracted to one of his students, Remus Lupin, who seems to think the teacher has a lot to learn.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written for Snupin Santa 2010.

_“The world's literature and folklore are full of stories that point out how futile it can be to seek happiness. Rather, happiness is a blessing that comes to you as you go along; a treasure that you incidentally find.” - Louis Binstock_

 

Severus strode into his one o’clock Southern Folklore class and went straight to the lectern without glancing around at the class; he made it a habit to ignore their presence until he’d set down his books and notes and pulled out the class roster and a pen. He wasn’t the most approachable professor in the department to begin with, but on the first day of class, he was particularly distant because he didn’t want to give any of them the idea that he was their peer, much less their friend. Unlike some of his colleagues who behaved as if they were still grad students themselves, he’d never been interested in blurring the teacher-student line, and he maintained strict control over his classroom. He took pride in having exacting standards, and he’d heard that earning an A in one of his classes had become a badge of honor among both undergraduate and grad students alike. 

He knew students who wanted an easy A avoided him, and that was fine with him; he also knew that he had a reputation of being “scary”, and that was fine, too. It wasn’t undeserved, after all. No, he didn’t care if he was reputedly one of the toughest, most intimidating professors; he simply couldn’t understand why he had _groupies_. Sometimes when he grew bored during his office hours, he searched for himself on ratemyprofessor.com, and he was always amazed to find gushing praise and positive comments about his speaking voice amid all the usual “its to hard. Snape sux” whining. He was even more amazed when people took him more than once, much less followed him through multiple classes, because he assumed one semester would be enough for anybody. 

But as he took roll, he didn’t even have to call out most of the names because he knew the students already from the fall semester or earlier. The class was a hybrid, an upper-level class for both MA and Ph.D students, but it was still small with only about twelve students, eleven of whom he’d had before. Frowning, he glanced around, seeking the one unfamiliar face in the crowd - that of Remus Lupin - and it was easy enough to find because Lupin stood out from the tattooed and pierced twenty-somethings around him. While they were mostly dressed in sweatshirts and sweatpants or even flannel pajama bottoms, Lupin was dressed in pressed khaki trousers and a brown cable-knit sweater, and he was obviously a non-traditional student; if he wasn’t Severus’ age, he was close. 

Briefly, Severus wondered if Lupin was new to the graduate program, but he didn’t bother asking; he wasn’t _that_ curious. Instead, he passed out the syllabus and returned to the lectern to begin his opening spiel. 

“Southern folklore is a misnomer,” he began, sweeping his gaze across the room. “It’s a melting pot of traditions and beliefs from various cultures including, but not limited to England, France, Africa, and Native American. There is no one type of Southern folklore any more than there is one Southern dialect. Although there is significant overlap, there are also vast differences, such as the Outer Banks of North Carolina and the Gullah of South Carolina, to give an example of two very disparate groups...” 

He spent a few more minutes giving them a bit of simplified background on regional folklore before moving on to discuss the syllabus and remind them that there was an electronic copy available on Moodle if they lost the paper copy. Most of them already knew his contact information, but he went over it again already even though it was also on the syllabus because experience had taught him that most students had the memory of a gnat, and he didn’t trust them to remember anything from last semester - or to use the syllabus, if he was being cynically honest. He gave them a quick overview of what they would be focusing on over the course of the semester and what they would be graded on. 

“Are there any questions?” he asked, fixing them with a gimlet stare. 

There were none, and so he released them after only twenty-five minutes, content to keep the first day short, especially since he was in desperate need of another cup of coffee. 

Before he could pack up his things, however, Remus Lupin approached him, wearing an open, friendly smile, his blue eyes bright behind his wire-framed glasses. Lupin held out his hand in greeting. 

“Hello, Dr. Snape,” he said, and Severus recognized the low, husky drawl of the South Carolina Low Country in his voice. “I just wanted to introduce myself and say that I’m looking forward to your class. I’ve heard it’s very interesting.”

Severus heaved an internal sigh. Lupin was one of _those_ students, the kind who wanted to introduce themselves to every instructor - as if said instructor cared in the slightest - because they harbored the ridiculous notion that if their instructor knew them, it meant they would have an easier time of it in the class. But he dutifully clasped Lupin’s hand - and instantly felt a little tingle as he found himself caught by the warmth of Lupin’s hand and the intensity in Lupin’s eyes. 

Up close, he could see that Lupin’s light brown hair was liberally sprinkled with grey, and there was a dusting of freckles across his nose that Severus found charming. In fact, he realized with some dismay, Lupin was just his type: blue eyes, brown hair, broad shoulders, glasses. He was definitely attracted to Lupin, and it was just his luck that all it had taken was one touch for his skin to wake up and remind him exactly how long it had been since he’d had sex. Still, odds were that Lupin was straight, and he was a student, which meant he was off-limits either way. The university had a strict policy about teacher-student relationships, and even though Severus had tenure, he would be in a world of trouble if he broke the rules. 

“You’re Mr. Lupin, yes?” he asked, releasing Lupin’s hand swiftly. “You’re the only one in the room I didn’t recognize from the roster.”

“Remus Lupin, yes,” Lupin acknowledged. Severus thought that his gaze had suddenly become even more intense, almost searching as he looked into Severus’ eyes, but then Lupin was smiling more broadly, as though pleased that Severus had deduced his identity, even if it had been trivial to do so. “I’m a Ph.D candidate in tech writing. I’m taking my last semester of coursework, and your class came highly recommended.”

That explained why Severus hadn’t seen Lupin before; the department was a large and sprawling one with a little over a hundred faculty members who had offices and classrooms all over campus, and it was easy for students to avoid classes that fell outside of their areas of specialization. 

“If you’re a tech writer, then why are you taking my class?” he asked, puzzled. “It isn’t part of your required course of study.” 

“No, it isn’t required,” Lupin replied, giving a slight shrug. “But it worked out well with my schedule, since I took more of the core courses early on, and, as I said, it was recommended.” His eyes seemed to twinkle behind his glasses, and when he spoke again, his accent was more exaggerated. “‘Sides, what good ol’ Charleston boy could resist somethin’ so near and dear to his heart? I’ve heard folktales from the region all of my life, and I’m looking forward to learning about their origins.”

Severus nodded, satisfied with the explanation; it wasn’t the first time he’d had native South Carolinians take one of his Southern folklore courses, although it was usually the undergraduate version. 

“You’ll learn more than you expected,” he said in his most foreboding voice. “This is the graduate level course, which is more rigorous than the undergraduate course. I do hope you have some background in folklore already, or you might get lost.” 

Perhaps, if he was lucky, Lupin would drop the course, and Severus wouldn’t have to spend an entire semester looking at him. 

“What fun would it be if it was easy?” Lupin asked, blinking innocently. “Besides, my other class is _Theory of Professional Communication_ , which is as dull as it sounds, and I’m teaching two sections of freshman comp. I need something to keep me from dying of boredom this semester.”

Severus felt a small pang of sympathy for Lupin; he taught a section or two of freshman composition every other year, and he knew how frustrating it could be, but he refused to let his attitude soften just because he understood what it was like in the trenches. As for the other course, he had no idea what the theory of professional communication even was, and he was quite happy _not_ knowing because it did indeed sound dull.

“Good luck, then,” he said, edging away in a silent hint that he had other places to be. Like the Starbucks on campus.

“Thank you,” Lupin said. He appeared about to say something more, but then he simply smiled and nodded. “I appreciate your time, Dr. Snape, and I won’t keep you longer. Have a good day.”

Severus nodded tersely and made a beeline for the door, eager to get his hands on a grande mocha while he put together notes for his next class. By the time he’d walked over to the Starbucks housed in the cafeteria in the center of campus - thankfully close to the building where his office and classes were located - he’d convinced himself that teaching a class in which there was a student to whom he was attracted wouldn’t be difficult. Not at all. Really.

* * *

The first few days of classes went like they usually did, although this wasn’t one of Severus’ semesters to teach composition, and so he had no “deer caught in headlights” freshmen to terrorize. He was teaching upperclassmen and graduate students only this time, most of whom already knew him or were jaded and thus harder to terrorize. Still, Severus did his best, springing a difficult pop quiz in his Arthurian mythology course just to make certain they were doing the assigned reading. All that plus the usual endless emails to respond to or delete. 

No, he couldn’t add anyone to his class once enrollment was capped; go talk to the director of undergraduate studies. 

Yes, they would be using the textbook, and they did need to buy it. 

No, they could not make up the pop quiz. 

No one cares you published yet another article on mythology in _The Last Olympian_ series just to prove you’re not too old to be in touch with pop culture, Black, so shut the hell up and stop spamming the entire faculty every time you write a sentence.

That last email went unsent, but not because Severus didn’t want to send it. 

By Friday, he was quite ready to wrap up the week, and he planned to treat himself to lunch at Panera’s before going home to grade quizzes, and later, he might curl up on the couch with _Excalibur_. Still, he didn’t shortchange his folklore class, nudging them through a detailed discussion of various stories that recounted the devil making an appearance, such as the devil’s tramping ground and the alleged curse placed on the town of Bath, NC. They performed well enough that he didn’t feel the need to give them a quiz, but he did send them off with instructions to find at least two more religious themed folktales outside the textbooks and bring them to class for further discussion on Monday. With that, he dismissed them and gathered up his things, ready to start his weekend. 

Lupin didn’t head out with the other students; instead he approached Severus’ lectern, smiling widely. “That was absolutely fascinating!” he said enthusiastically. “Though the time went too quickly. I have so many more questions, especially about the curse on Bath.” He regarded Severus questioningly. “If you aren’t doing anything, Dr. Snape, could I buy you a cup of coffee and pick your brain for a bit? I’d love to know more about the places you mentioned, especially if you know any juicy details that didn’t make it into the textbook.”

Severus glanced at him, startled by the request, and for a moment, he didn’t know how to respond. He avoided fraternizing with students, but then again, most of his students were somewhere between eighteen and twenty-five years old, and he had little in common with them. His knowledge of popular music ended in the late Eighties, his favorite movies were either Bollywood or adaptations of Shakespeare, and he didn’t text-message, so they went blank when he mentioned The Who, and he went blank when they mentioned Lady Gaga. Lupin was older, though, and he did say he wanted to talk about the readings, so perhaps it wouldn’t be too painful. If it was, Severus could excuse himself on the grounds of having a committee meeting or a conference with a student. 

“I suppose so,” he said slowly. “You needn’t buy my coffee, however. That might raise a few administrative eyebrows if anyone noticed.” 

Lupin shrugged. “If that makes you more comfortable, not a problem,” he said lightly, as though the eyebrows of any administrator were of little concern to him. “I appreciate you agreeing to talk. I know you’re a busy man.”

“I am, yes,” Severus agreed, just in case he did need to lie about having a meeting in order to escape later. “Come on, then.” 

With that, he turned and marched out the door, not looking back to see if Lupin was following. He set a quick pace to Starbucks and ordered a caramel mocha and a slice of pumpkin bread, and then he claimed a small two-seat table tucked away in a corner while Lupin placed his own order. He pulled out the textbook just in case he needed to reference something while they talked, and he sipped his coffee while he waited, relishing the hit of caffeine. 

Lupin joined him quickly with his own cup, sliding into the seat across from him and placing his messenger bag on the floor next to his seat. He retrieved a notebook and pen from within, took a sip from his cup and then gazed at Severus, a slight smile playing about his lips. “Ah... hot chocolate. I always like this time of year because it’s a great excuse for indulging my taste for it.”

Severus snorted, but he said nothing; he wasn’t here to chit-chat, after all. “What questions did you have?” he asked, deciding to get straight to the point. 

Lupin inclined his head. “First, I was wondering if you’ve been to Bath or to The Devil’s Tramping Ground.”

“I’ve been to many of the places we discuss in my folklore courses,” Severus replied. “The Devil’s tramping ground is one of them. It was something of a disappointment, since it seems there is a mundane cause for the phenomenon: a natural salt lick.” 

Lupin’s eyebrows rose at that. “Really? Hmmm... Why do you think that it could have inspired tales for so many years, if it’s nothing more than a natural phenomenon? Do you think that man has a need to concoct stories of supernatural entities to explain things they don’t understand, or is it something else?”

“Not all folklore is centered around supernatural entities,” Severus pointed out. “Blackbeard was a mere man, but he has plenty of folklore surrounding him, for example. You must consider too that these tales were born in a time when religion had more power and influence over the average person’s life than science, and certainly spreading tales of the devil walking around nearby would provide good incentive for people to behave themselves.” 

“Much as the tale of Jesse Elliot and his horse was an admonition against greed and gambling?” Lupin asked, before sipping his chocolate and then licking the foam from his lips.

Severus tried not to stare at the flick of Lupin’s tongue, and he forced himself to focus on his pumpkin bread to distract himself from the sight. “It could be, yes,” he said. “There might have even been such a race with tragic results, but perhaps the story grew with the re-telling, with implied warnings added with each new embellishment.” 

Lupin nodded, and he tucked a strand of his overly long hair behind one ear. “Then do you find that a large percentage of the folktales are based around some moral lesson?” 

Severus sipped his coffee as he considered the question, pointedly not looking at Lupin’s slender fingers or his silky hair. “It’s hard to say,” he replied at last. “You could probably find a moral in just about anything if you looked hard enough, but I think many tales are also attempts to explain something someone saw - or thought they saw - or pure entertainment. Some might even have basis in fact, such as the legend of the moon-eyed people that comes from the Cherokee. Some historians speculate that the legend sprang from old memories of white explorers who arrived pre-Columbus. Then you have historical figures with their own cult following, like Blackbeard, Jesse James, and Davy Crockett, who, I might add,” he drawled sarcastically, “likely did not ‘kill him a bear when he was only three’, whatever Disney might say about it.”

“Believe me, I take my History According To The Mouse with a very, very large grain of salt,” Lupin replied, wrinkling his nose and smiling. “But yes, it makes sense that historical figures end up larger than life in all cultures, and that stories would propagate and grow for entertainment.” He sighed regretfully. “Storytelling is becoming a lost art, it seems. Otherwise we wouldn’t have Hollywood doing endless remakes of the same things rather than coming up with truly unique stories.”

“It isn’t just Hollywood. There are folktales that have variations on the same theme,” Severus replied, turning the conversation back to what he knew best since he certainly wasn’t up on the latest blockbuster movies. “The vanishing hitchhiker, ghost lights near train tracks, Bigfoot legends... the list goes on. There are certain types of stories that we apparently enjoy retelling.” 

“So do you still run across completely new stories you haven’t heard before, or do you think you’ve mined them all?” Lupin propped his elbow on the table and rested his chin in his hand as he gazed at Severus. “It would be sad to think there were no more stories to be discovered.”

Severus found it rather disconcerting to have someone hanging onto his every word and actually behaving as if they were interested in what he was saying. Few of his colleagues were as passionate about folklore, especially regional folklore, as he was, and he rarely encountered students who were enthralled by the subject enough to discuss it with him outside the classroom. It was a refreshing change, and he found himself relaxing a bit and reconsidering the fictional committee meeting. 

“Entirely new stories?” He shook his head. “I’ve been immersed in studying folklore too long to find anything wildly original. New variations, however - I find those all the time. To me, they’re as fascinating as if they were entirely new. It’s interesting to see how the stories have been shaped by their environment and the passage of time. Even with so many stories having been written down and published, there’s still a considerable oral tradition, even if it’s more with the urban legend end of the scale.” 

“That’s how I learned most of the stories I know,” Lupin said, a reminiscent smile on his lips. “My grandmother’s housekeeper was Gullah, and I used to sit and listen to her telling tales all day. It seemed she had a story for everything, and she knew them all by heart. I wish I could remember every one of them; they were fascinating.”

“There isn’t enough being done to preserve those stories,” Severus grumbled. “We’re losing a rich part of our cultural heritage through neglect, if you ask me.” Scowling with annoyance, he finished off his pumpkin bread. “I’ve devoted years to collecting stories and superstitions, but too many people fail to recognize the importance of the Gullah culture. They don’t even realize it _is_ a culture all its own, much less know that Gullah has been officially recognized as a language, not merely pidgin English.”

“Well , _you_ recognize it, so that’s a start,” Lupin said. Then he sat up straight, and grinned. “I still exchange Christmas cards with Mama Ada’s daughter, Sallie Ann. Why don’t I ask her if she has any of her mother’s stories written down, or if she could write down what she remembers herself?”

Severus sat up straight, staring at Lupin in amazement, and then a thought occurred to him, and he narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “It won’t earn you extra credit points if you do,” he warned. 

Lupin waved dismissively. “I’m not looking for extra credit,” he said. “This isn’t about _me_ , it’s about doing what you said: collecting stories so that the importance of the Gullah culture is preserved.”

Severus raised one eyebrow at him, curiosity mingling with his lingering suspicion. “Why do you care?” he asked bluntly. “I can’t believe a couple of classes with me have lit an inspirational flame and kindled your love of folklore. So why would you care about helping?”

Lupin opened his mouth, about to say something, and then he closed it and and sat back, giving a slight shrug and a small smile. “Maybe you did inspire me, and to an extent, it’s my culture, too, at least by affiliation. It never occurred to me that it was in danger of being lost, because for me, it’s always been there.” He chuckled. “Or maybe I’m afraid the ghost of Mama Ada will haunt me if I don’t.”

That sounded reasonable enough - well, not the ghost part; that was pure foolishness - and Severus nodded, accepting Lupin’s response. “All right, if you want to get those stories and your friends are willing to share them, I would like to have them.” He paused and belatedly added, “Thank you.” 

“You’re welcome - assuming they share them!” Lupin said, chuckling again, a low, throaty sound of delight. Then he glanced at his watch, his eyes widening. “Oh, blast! I lost track of the time. I’m going to have to run, I’m afraid. My last freshman comp class is in ten minutes.” He smiled apologetically as he tucked his notebook back into his messenger bag. “Thank you for answering all my questions, Dr. Snape. I enjoyed our conversation very much.”

For a moment, Severus sat dumbfounded, startled by the abrupt end of the conversation; he’d actually been enjoying it. Besides that, _he_ was the one who was supposed to put an end to it, not Lupin! 

“You’re welcome,” he said at last, and then he made a point of looking at his own watch. “As it happens, I have a committee meeting to attend anyway.” He pushed back his chair and rose to his feet. “I’ll see you on Monday, Mr. Lupin.” 

“Until Monday,” Lupin replied, standing up and slinging his bag over his shoulder. “Have a great weekend!” 

With another smile and a wave, he turned and headed quickly for the door, and then he was gone.

Severus watched him go, frowning, and then turned back to the table to clear away the trash with a quiet “hmph!” He disposed of his cup and napkin and gathered up his things, making a point to go out a different door and headed off to his car, feeling an unusual and inexplicable anticipation for Monday.

* * *

Over the course of the weekend, Severus gave himself a stern talking to about the perils of fraternizing with students, even students who were close to his own age and ridiculously appealing, and by the time Monday rolled around, he had resolved to rebuff Mr. Lupin politely but firmly should there be any further invitations for coffee and conversation. He had colleagues to talk to, after all, some of whom he even liked; he didn’t need to resort to socializing with students. 

The problem was that he wasn’t given a chance to rebuff Mr. Lupin. After class, Mr. Lupin gave him a cheerful smile and a wave - and then walked out the door! Severus stared after him, dismayed that he hadn’t been able to deliver his carefully planned speech about inappropriate teacher-student interaction. But dismay faded into annoyance as he realized he’d been letting his own attraction to Mr. Lupin color everything and reading more into Mr. Lupin’s behavior than he should have. There was nothing about the man that set off Severus’ gay-dar, although granted, it was rather rusty from disuse. Still, Severus chalked the whole business up to his own foolishness and solidified his resolve to keep things professional should Mr. Lupin approach him again. 

But Mr. Lupin did not approach him again, which was something of a relief, but Severus also had a feeling of waiting for the other shoe to drop; Mr. Lupin had promised to procure those stories, which meant there would be some kind of interaction at some point, and Severus was ready to get it over with, especially since he couldn’t seem to stop himself from noticing Mr. Lupin every damned day in class. 

For a straight man, Mr. Lupin knew how to dress, and while he never showed up in a suit and tie, he was never as casually dressed as the twenty-somethings around him, either. One day, it was chocolate-brown trousers that emphasized the narrowness of his hips; the next, it was a plain white shirt unbuttoned enough to offer a tantalizing hint of curling chest hair. And always those glasses perched on the end of his nose as he listened attentively and scribbled notes. Severus never had to worry that Mr. Lupin was texting under the desk or checking his email or Facebook, because his attention always seemed to be riveted solely on Severus during every lecture and discussion. 

Over a week passed, and still Mr. Lupin did nothing but bid him a cheerful “Have a good day” on the way out, and Severus began to relax. Perhaps Mr. Lupin hadn’t been able to get the stories or perhaps it had been an idle offer, forgotten as quickly as it was made. Either way, it appeared that Severus wouldn’t have to worry about any further one-on-one interaction with Mr. Lupin, and that was most definitely a relief. 

No sooner had he let down his guard, however, than Mr. Lupin approached him after class, smiling widely at him with the air of a little boy who was hoping for a pat on the head. “She wrote me back!” he said, his blue eyes shining as he handed Severus a sheet of paper covered with spidery handwriting on both sides. “Sallie Ann sent one of her mother’s stories, and she’s promised more. I just hope it’s one you haven’t heard before!”

Severus stared down at the letter in his hands, surprised that Mr. Lupin had actually followed through. So many students had good intentions, but as a teacher, Severus knew all too well about the road to grading hell being paved with students’ intentions. 

“Thank you,” he said at last, glancing at Mr. Lupin with approval. “I’ll have a look at them during my office hours this afternoon.”

“Oh.” The bright expression on Mr. Lupin’s face faded slightly. “I... well. All right.” He said the words slowly and reluctantly, and then he looked at Severus, eyes widening with appeal. “I was hoping I could convince you to come out for coffee again and read it then. To be honest, I’m dying to know how different it is from other things you’ve heard. I was hoping to write back to Sallie Ann at once if it’s unusual and offer to take dictation from her over the phone. I think I could type on the computer faster than she writes longhand, and it would spare her poor old arthritic fingers.”

Severus hesitated and tried to remember his carefully prepared speech about fraternization, but the words faded in the face of Mr. Lupin’s earnest appeal. It was for research, Severus told himself as he nodded slowly. 

“I suppose I could,” he said as he slid the papers into his messenger bag. “You want to go now, I assume?” 

“If that works for you,” Mr. Lupin replied, flashing a charming grin. 

“I thought you had a class to teach,” Severus replied, raising one eyebrow. 

Mr. Lupin shook his head, dispelling Severus’s hopes for a short meeting. “I gave them today off to do research for their next paper,” he said easily. “So, as it happens, I have the rest of the afternoon free.”

“I see.” Severus regarded him dubiously, thinking that was awfully convenient, but then he shrugged and slung his bag over his shoulder. “All right, then. Let’s go to the coffee shop, and I’ll have a look at the story.” 

“Great!” Mr. Lupin flashed him another smile, and then he turned and headed toward the door. “I can’t wait to find out your opinion.”

Severus gave a noncommittal grunt, and he maintained a professional demeanor - and a professional distance - as they walked to the coffee shop. He made a point of paying for his own coffee again, and he secured a table while Mr. Lupin waited for his beverage. Opening his bag, he pulled out the papers and began to read while he waited. 

Mr. Lupin joined him quickly, wearing an expression of anticipation. He said nothing, however, simply settling in opposite Severus and sipping it his cup, although Severus thought he might almost be quivering with eagerness.

Severus had to pull out his own glasses to help him make out the small, spidery script, and he tried to appear nonchalant about it, hoping the glasses made him appear more authoritative rather than more geeky. As he read, however, all superficial thoughts about his appearance fled as he got caught up in the story, and when he looked up at last, he offered a slight but pleased smile. 

“It’s a good story,” he said, “and one I haven’t heard before. Tales of mortals besting the devil aren’t new, of course, but this variation is different. There are also certain elements that connect this story much closer to its African roots than usual.” 

Mr. Lupin’s face lit up as though Severus had just handed him his Ph.D, and Summa Cum Laude at that. “That’s great!” he said, nodding enthusiastically. “I had asked her to focus on ones that she’d not heard from anyone except Mama Ada, and she says there are at least a dozen more she could think of off the top of her head.” He sat back in his seat, regarding Severus with a speculative air. “Think that could be worth another whole book, Professor?”

Severus put down the papers and fixed his gaze on them as he considered the question. “It might be,” he said slowly. “I hadn’t planned to publish another book. I’d rather focus on my classes than on publishing, and I can now that I have tenure, but this would be tempting.” 

“It would be doing a service to your students if you did publish another book,” Mr. Lupin pointed out. “And to the Gullah people.”

Severus toyed with the curled edge of one page, considering the idea, and he shook his head slowly. “That’s true enough,” he said at last. “I dislike the idea of getting caught up in the demands of publishing again, however. I was on the publish-or-perish hamster wheel while I was tenure-track, and it was maddening, trying to wring out pretentious ideas that perhaps all of two people will ever read. The book I published while I was still working toward tenure has become a standard textbook for folklore classes around the country, so that gives me a little leverage now.” 

He didn’t say that Dumbledore had practically given him carte blanche when it came to avoiding publishing and focusing on teaching more than research in return for the prestige that listing his name in the faculty roster brought, but it was true. It was also the primary reason why Black tried to publish everything up to - and perhaps including - his grocery list in the hopes of hitting it as big as Severus had in the field. Black didn’t like being the secondary folklorist, not after having been catered to his entire life, according to his brother, who happened to be Severus’ best friend. 

“With a new resource, however, I might consider it,” he added. 

“You know, academic works aren’t the only possible outlet for these stories,” Mr. Lupin said thoughtfully. “Academia is important, don’t get me wrong, but what you said about writing things that only two people might read has got me thinking. Have you considered writing something for the mainstream press? Something that could bring these stories and the history of the Gullah people to a much wider audience? Maybe even a couple of books - one for children, with stories appropriate for the young ones, and another for the more mature reader?”

“I can’t imagine myself writing a children’s book,” Severus replied with a snort. “The other, however... Perhaps. I’m not that fond of writing, to be honest. I would rather discuss the stories than write about them.”

“That makes sense.” Mr. Lupin’s brow creased as he seemed to consider Severus’ statement seriously. Then he brightened. “Well, I happen to like writing. If you wouldn’t consider it beneath you, perhaps we could collaborate on something?”

Severus stared at him, scarcely able to believe what he’d heard. “First of all, you have a dissertation to write,” he pointed out. “Second of all, we’re in entirely different areas of concentration. Third, the university would likely frown on it unless you were being paid as a graduate research assistant. There are lines, you know, and the university prefers to keep them clearly drawn.”

Rather than seeming daunted, Mr. Lupin laughed. “Do you know how stuffy that sounds?” he asked, clearly amused. “They would seriously frown on a creative endeavor that would add to their list of published works being done by the man best qualified to do it, assisted by a willing volunteer? As for my dissertation, that won’t be a problem. I... have time. It’s not as though I’ve a gun held to my head saying I have to be finished at a particular time. I don’t mind a delay.” He paused, his smile becoming rueful. “Although if that’s your way of saying you don’t want me work with you on it, that’s fine, Professor. I’m a big boy. You can just say I’m being a nuisance, and I won’t bug you about it.” He grinned again. “Much.”

Severus frowned as he peered at Mr. Lupin dubiously. “Again I must ask... _why_? You don’t know me any better than I know you.” 

For a moment, Mr. Lupin simply looked at him searchingly, his blue eyes intense. Then he relaxed and shrugged. “Don’t you believe in serendipity, Dr. Snape?” he asked quietly. “Haven’t you ever had an idea that seemed so right, coming at the right time, with the right circumstances, that you felt you couldn’t _not_ try to do it? Haven’t the stars ever aligned to suggest to you that some things are worth taking a chance on?”

“No,” Severus replied quellingly, taking refuge in his coffee cup to escape the intensity of Mr. Lupin’s eyes. “I’m not a romantic, Mr. Lupin, and I don’t believe in serendipity, coincidence, or fate. I’m a pragmatist, and I don’t take unnecessary risks.” 

“I see.” Lupin glanced at him, then away, and there was a flash of something almost like disappointment on his face before he picked up his cup and sipped from it. “Oh, well, it was just a wild idea,” he said nonchalantly. “It’s not a big deal. I’ll write to Sallie Ann and thank her for the story and ask her to send any others, but I’ll let her know there isn’t any rush. I’ll turn them over to you as she sends them, and you can... well, do whatever you like with them. As you said, this isn’t my area of expertise, and I have classes to teach and a dissertation to write.”

“Yes, you do,” Severus said firmly, and he gave a haughty lift of his chin. “You’re still a student. _My_ student, to be precise. It wouldn’t be appropriate.” 

He was doing the right thing, and he knew it, but he couldn’t quite shake a sense of disappointment over refusing the offer to collaborate. Then again, that ought to reassure him that he’d done the right thing in more ways that one; there was no point in risking his pride and dignity over _anyone_ , much less someone completely out of reach. 

“That’s right, I’m yours.” Mr. Lupin’s voice was low, and Severus wasn’t certain he’d caught all of the words, but then Mr. Lupin was smiling at him blandly. “Well, then, I suppose I’ll let you know when I receive more stories.”

Severus peered at Mr. Lupin suspiciously for a moment, wondering what exactly he’d heard and what it meant if he _had_ heard correctly. Then he shook his head, brushing it off as inconsequential. 

“I’d appreciate it. Thank you,” he said at last. “If the other stories are anything like the first, they will be quite a welcome addition to the pool. It’s small enough as it is, and I believe we need to preserve as much as possible.”

Of course, in saying so, he realized he had given himself an excellent reason to write the damned book after all, and he heaved an irritated sigh and muttered, “Damn it.” 

For a moment, Mr. Lupin’s eyes appeared to gleam with unholy glee, but between one blink and the next, his bland expression was back in place. He lifted his cup and drained the contents, and then he rose to his feet with a look of regret. 

“I should let you go,” he said. “I know how busy you are, Professor, and I’ve taken up enough of your time. I’ll let you know when Sallie Ann sends more stories. Otherwise... thanks again, and I’ll see you in class.”

Severus looked up at him with a puzzled frown, fresh annoyance rising up within him at Mr. Lupin cutting short the conversation and leaving first _again_. And then he was annoyed with himself for being annoyed because he did _not_ need to encourage Mr. Lupin to keep talking to him. The more distance between them, the better, and he reminded himself of that forcefully as he pushed back his chair and stood as well. 

“Very well,” he said with all the cool neutrality he could muster as he grabbed his bag and cup in a bid to be the first to leave the table. “Good afternoon, Mr. Lupin.” 

With that, he hurried away without a backwards glance, grumbling to himself all the way back to his office.


	2. Chapter 2

Over the next few days, Severus kept a covert eye on Mr. Lupin, watching for any sign that Mr. Lupin intended to accost him again after class, but days passed, and Mr. Lupin went back to leaving along with everyone else, strolling out the door with a cheerful smile and a wave before disappearing. It was the most irksome thing that had happened to Severus in longer than he could remember, and for the life of him, Severus couldn’t figure out whether he was more irked because he didn’t want Mr. Lupin paying attention to him or because he _did_. Either way, Mr. Lupin’s presence in his class had become a constant itch under his skin, something he couldn’t possibly ignore no matter how much he wanted to. 

But days turned into a week, and one week turned into two, and Severus began to relax, thinking perhaps his refusal to collaborate had put Mr. Lupin off for good. He patted himself on the back for handling the situation appropriately and turned his attention to grading papers from his undergraduate course on Arthurian mythology and devising a suitably challenging exam for the folklore course since midterms were only about three weeks away. 

He generally used his office hours for grading; his office was small but snug with a window and most of the wall space covered with bookshelves, which were all crammed full of books. His desk was tidy, and he didn’t have much in the way of personal knick-knacks; even if he’d had a lot of personal items, he didn’t like clutter. The only things he had on display were framed copies of his degrees hanging on the wall behind his desk and one photograph of himself and his best friend, Regulus, taken a couple of years ago when he’d spent a week with Regulus and his wife at their beach house over the summer. There were two chairs on the other side of his desk and a floor lamp beside the desk because he found the overhead light too harsh; other than that, however, his office was neat and fairly spartan. For him, however, it was a comfortable space, and he enjoyed retreating there with a cup of coffee to cut a swathe through the stacks of papers - all the fewer to carry home with him. 

That particular afternoon, he had Jazz playing through his computer speakers, the volume turned down enough that he could hear it without disturbing anyone in the adjoining office, and a steaming cup of caramel mocha was within easy reach as he bled red ink over his students’ papers, reading glasses perched on his sizable nose as he scribbled notes in the margins. There was a knock on the door frame, and when he looked up, it was to find Remus Lupin standing there, regarding him with an rather intense gaze.

Mr. Lupin was dressed differently than he did for class. For once, he was in jeans - well washed ones that had faded to a pale blue and fit him as snugly as a glove. His sweater was a deep violet blue, and beneath it, he wore a white turtleneck that made his skin look bronzed. His hair was pulled back in a ponytail at the base of his neck, exposing the sharp line of his jaw, which was shadowed with a hint of stubble. He smiled at Severus and walked into the office, stopping on the other side of Severus’ desk.

“I hope I’m not interrupting you,” he said, placing a manila envelope on the corner of the desk. As he drew his arm back, Severus could see that he wore a plain silver ring on his thumb, and above that, a wide silver cuff bracelet encircled his wrist where he’d pushed his sweater up his arm. “Sallie Ann sent several more stories, and I thought I’d bring them by.”

Severus’ mouth had gone too dry for him to speak, and he found himself staring up at Mr. Lupin mutely as he tried to tamp down a sudden flare of attraction. Having fantasies about nibbling his student’s jawline and wondering what that ring would feel like against his bare skin if Mr. Lupin caressed him were _not_ appropriate thoughts, and he forced them aside. 

Clearing his throat, he gestured to one of the two available chairs - and then silently damned himself for prolonging the torture by inviting Mr. Lupin to stay. 

“Thank you,” he said. “You didn’t have to go to the trouble. You could have given them to me after class or even dropped them off in the campus mail.”

Mr. Lupin immediately moved to take a seat, leaning back in the chair with a smile and crossing his legs, with the seeming intention of settling in for a while. “It wasn’t a problem. I had to come to campus today to do some research in the library anyway, so it wasn’t out of my way. I read the stories earlier, and I found them so interesting, I wanted to make certain you saw them as soon as possible.”

“I see.” Severus reached for the envelope and focused on opening it to distract himself from the sight of Mr. Lupin’s jean-clad legs and narrow hips. “Well, I appreciate it.” He paused and then added hopefully, “If you need to return to your research, feel free. You don’t have to wait for me to read these.” 

“I’m due for a break anyway,” Mr. Lupin replied, making no move to leave. “And I’m dying to know what you think. These are some of the stories I remember from my childhood. There’s one in particular that I loved; I wonder if you’ll be able to pick it out of the bunch.”

Pressing his lips together in annoyance, Severus pulled out the sheaf of papers, scowling as he sifted through them; he could practically feel the weight of Mr. Lupin’s gaze, and his brain wasn’t helping as it kept throwing images of Mr. Lupin with those soft, faded jeans around his ankles as he bent Severus over the desk. Severus cleared his throat again and forced himself to concentrate on the stories, skimming over the pages quickly. Despite his distraction, he found the stories quite engaging, and he was drawn in quickly.

At last, he looked up at Mr. Lupin again, still frowning faintly. “These are all quite good,” he said, “although I don’t know you well enough to hazard a guess about which you like best.” 

Mr. Lupin grinned mischieviously. “You should know me well enough,” he said, leaning forward slightly. “But as a hint, let’s just say that I was a very typical small boy, and all creatures love a mirror, even a fantastical one.”

“Fine.” Severus waved irritably, not really wanting to play games. “The one with the wolf that fell down a well, then.”

“Bravo! You win,” Mr. Lupin said, seeming quite delighted despite Severus’ annoyance. “Mama Ada called me ‘Little Wolf’ and I was always getting into trouble, so that story became one of my favorites. I never fell down a well, thank heavens, but I did manage to get up to enough mischief.”

“I assume you grew out of it,” Severus said, leaning back in his chair and folding his arms across his chest. Somehow, he suspected the boyish mischief-maker still lurked beneath the surface - and might be channeled in more adult ways.

“I may grow older, but I’ll never grow up,” Mr. Lupin replied, chuckling. “Witness the fact that I’m back in college. I’m still trying to decide what to be when I’m a real adult.”

“It’s about time you did figure it out, I think,” Severus replied, a disapproving note in his voice. “You’re a little long in the tooth to still be trying to ‘find yourself’ or whatever they call being irresponsible these days.”

“There’s a difference between being irresponsible and looking for something you want to do for the rest of your life.” Mr. Lupin’s voice was soft. “I spent many years working very hard at something that wasn’t my first love, but it earned me the freedom to go back to school and figure out what that actually is.”

“And here you are, on the verge of earning a Ph.D, but you still haven’t decided what you’re going to do with it?” Severus asked, one eyebrow raised. The knowledge that Mr. Lupin had actually held down a job was reassuring; he’d begun wondering if Mr. Lupin was one of those Peter Pan types who avoided responsibility like the plague. But it still sounded to him as if Mr. Lupin lacked a certain self-awareness and ambition that Severus had prided himself on. He had worked hard all his life, pulling himself up from difficult roots, and he was exactly where he wanted to be. 

Mr. Lupin grinned again. “Getting the Ph.D gives me a great excuse to come back to school and learn, and I’ve found that I do enjoy teaching very much. I’ve decided that once I earn my degree, I want to search for a tenure-track position; I may be a bit old to start at the bottom of the faculty ladder, but anything worth having has to be worked for, don’t you think?”

Grudgingly, Severus gave him a couple of points for that. “Yes, I agree,” he said. “And you certainly will work for it. Once you’ve found a tenure-track position, you’ll spend the next five or six years trying to juggle teaching and service and trying to publish every sentence you write while justifying yourself to the chair on an annual basis until you’re deemed worthy of permanency. That or you’ll be stuck in an adjunct position, which is little better than indentured servitude.”

“I know you speak from experience,” Mr. Lupin said, raising a brow. “Did you always want to be a teacher?”

“Yes,” Severus replied with absolute certainty. “I enjoy academia for the most part. I knew I had no interest in teaching in the public school system, and the tenure system offered the kind of job security I wanted after...” He hesitated, debating whether he ought to reveal something so personal about himself, but then again, he supposed it couldn’t hurt anything. “After growing up poor. Here, I can continue studying folklore and put my interests to good use.”

“Job security is a good thing,” Mr. Lupin agreed. “And you’re an excellent teacher, so it’s great that you’ve found a way to be so directly involved with educating others in something you’re passionate about. That’s what I want in my life; hard work doesn’t bother me, but I’d like to be doing it for a reason other than money. I want to feel like what I’m doing really matters in some way.”

“Well, don’t assume you’ll get that from teaching,” Severus replied grumpily, reaching out to tap the stack of graded papers on his desk. “Judging by some of the work handed in to me, I have to wonder if they listen at all or if they’re too busy thinking about their next Facebook status to pay attention to instructions.”

Severus’ comment was greeted with laughter. “Point taken,” Mr. Lupin said, making a gesture in the air as though giving Severus a metaphorical point. “But there’s no telling how you might touch your students. Even those who don’t seem to be paying attention will take something away from your instruction, even if they don’t realize it. And haven’t you had a student or two over the years who’ve gone on to do something to make you proud? Something you can point to and know that if it weren’t for you, they’d never have accomplished what they did?”

“Not really, no,” Severus replied, shaking his head. “Once a student leaves my classroom, I rarely see them again unless they take another class with me. I don’t use social networking sites, so I don’t keep up with them. Once in a while, I see undergraduates have moved on to grad school, but I can’t say it’s because of me.” He paused, considering the question further. “I do get the occasional email from former students, and I do serve on thesis and dissertation committees,” he conceded, inclining his head slightly to acknowledge the point. “But for the most part, they’re in and out, and that’s the end of it. In that sense, teaching at this level is different from the public schools, where you have a chance of watching students progress for a number of years.”

“Oh.” Mr. Lupin looked a little non-plussed, but then he relaxed and shrugged. “Maybe I should be at the lower level, then. I rather like the idea of watching their progress. To know that I’ve influenced students and helped them to achieve their own dreams.”

“Perhaps you should,” Severus agreed, nodding. “Although there are ways you can be more interactive with students, such as working with the English Club or the English Graduate Student Organization. I tend not to fraternize with students, and so I’m content not to wonder where they go once they walk out my door, but some of my colleagues enjoy being more interactive. Some enjoy it too much at times,” he added, annoyance tinging his voice as he thought about Black, who behaved as if he was one of the grad students himself sometimes. “I prefer to keep the professional boundaries in place.”

“I see.” Mr. Lupin tilted his head to one side and clasped his hands around his knee. “I do think I’d like to be a bit more in touch than you prefer, although I suppose my interest is more paternal than anything else. I don’t have children, obviously, or any siblings to provide me with nieces and nephews to spoil. So the role of nurturing educator seems like a good fit for me.”

“Whereas ‘paternal’ is not a word that one would apply to me, even if one was feeling generous,” Severus replied with wry amusement. 

“Perhaps not - but there isn’t anything wrong with that,” Mr. Lupin said easily. “If you’re comfortable with yourself and enjoy what you do, that’s all that really matters. There are enough miserable people in the world; you see them all the time, trudging from work to home and back again as though only the routine is keeping them going. Sometimes I think many of them are trying to fulfill a vision of what someone else thinks they should be, and that’s why they’re so unhappy. That’s why I think that the money you earn at a job is less important than if what you are doing fulfills you in some way.”

“Aren’t you a little old to be such an idealist?” Severus asked, arching his eyebrow again. “Or is that you haven’t taught enough sections of freshman composition to be as thoroughly jaded as the rest of us yet?”

Mr. Lupin grinned and shrugged. “Perhaps a little of both,” he replied. “But I told you I spent nearly twenty years doing something that made money, but didn’t really offer me any feeling of fulfillment. You, on the other hand, appear to enjoy what you do - if not all if it - “ he nodded at the stack of papers, “then at least enough of it that you’re still doing it. And if you’ll pardon a personal comment, you don’t seem the type to suffer in silence if you were really unhappy with your circumstances. So if I’m an idealist for hoping to achieve what you have, then I bear the label proudly.”

Severus gave a noncommittal grunt and shrugged. “Perhaps you’re suited for it, after all,” he said. “Perhaps even more suited than I am, since I prefer the teaching and research end of things more than the ‘dealing with students’ end of things. With all its perks, teaching does give me the freedom to read and dig up folktales, but then I have to do tiresome things like grade awful papers and deal with students weeping or growing belligerent over grades that they most definitely earned.”

For a moment, Mr. Lupin’s eyes seemed to glitter with some inner amusement, but he simply nodded. “I can imagine there will be drawbacks, and I’ve actually run into a few of them myself. But on the whole, I’ve enjoyed the teaching very much - although I have to say that contacting Sallie Ann and digging up the folktales has been almost like a treasure hunt. It’s a lot more fun than the research for technical writing!”

“Anything would be more fun than doing research for technical writing, if you ask me,” Severus replied dryly. “That is one area I don’t claim to understand in the slightest - and I don’t care to.”

“It’s lucrative, though - and there is a need for good technical writers.” Mr. Lupin’s lips twitched slightly. “And I have a lot of experience in it, so it was a logical choice for my Ph.D, and it’s far too late to change now. But once I have the degree, I might change focus. I can see why you like your research so much.”

“It’s a very different field,” Severus pointed out. “You aren’t already planning to pursue yet another degree, are you?” 

“Probably not, but I can always do research on my own,” Mr. Lupin replied, then grinned broadly. “Don’t worry, Dr. Snape, I’m not setting my sights on your job. But perhaps one day, I’ll write a children’s book on Gullah folktales, and _then_ you’ll have one student you can point to and say that they’d never have accomplished what they did without your influence.”

Severus snorted at that and shook his head. “We’ll see,” he said. “In the meantime, I suggest you focus your energies on writing your dissertation - and passing my class. Midterms are coming up, you know.”

“I haven’t forgotten! I’ve been making sure to keep up with all the reading,” Mr. Lupin assured him with a virtuous look. Then he chuckled again. “And if that’s your way of telling me I need to stop annoying you and go back to the library, I get the hint. You’re a hard man to please, Professor. But I keep trying.”

The words caused a strange warmth to bloom in the pit of Severus’ stomach, and he squelched it swiftly. It was impossible that Mr. Lupin had meant them in any way other than as a student attempting to please a teacher, but Severus’ wayward libido had other ideas. 

“Just keep up with the reading and participate in class discussions, and I’ll be happy,” he said gruffly, averting his gaze. 

“Yes, sir.” Mr. Lupin rose to his feet and gave Severus a mock salute. “And I’m sure if you aren’t happy, you’ll be the first to let me know. Well, I guess I’ll see you in class tomorrow; good luck with the grading!”

“Thank you.” Severus glanced at him briefly and then gave a dismissive wave. “Go do something technical.” 

“All right,” Mr. Lupin laughed and moved toward the door. He stopped before stepping out into the hallway, looking back at Severus over his shoulder. “I’ll let you know if I get any more stories; I think I’ll ask Sallie Ann if she remembers any more about the Wolf. I seem to recall one about him getting his tail caught in a trap. And _that_ is one I can definitely sympathize with!” 

With a final grin, he walked out, although it must have been Severus’ imagination that he did so with a deliberate sway of his hips that emphasized the tightness of his jeans. Severus couldn’t have torn his gaze away if his life depended on it, and he swallowed hard after Mr. Lupin finally disappeared from view, stirred in ways he hadn’t been in far too long. Shaking himself out of his lust-induced stupor, he scowled and grabbed his red pen, returning to his grading in a far less settled state of mind than he had been before Mr. Lupin’s unexpected visit - and he didn’t have a damned clue as to what to do about it.

* * *

Severus glanced at the clock on his computer screen after he hit “send” on an email to Albus Dumbledore, the chair of the department, who was trying to convince him to serve on the Personnel Committee. One of the members had gone on maternity leave for the remainder of the semester, and Dumbledore wanted Severus to fill in, but Severus had refused as he always did; he avoided service as much as he avoided publishing, preferring to focus on the classroom instead. 

It was almost ten minutes past eleven, which meant Mr. Lupin was ten minutes late for his requested conference. The folklore class had a lengthy paper due soon, and Mr. Lupin claimed to have questions. Severus supposed it was too much to hope that Mr. Lupin would skip entirely, and he turned back to his in-box, determined to clear it out a bit while he waited. 

About five minutes later, Mr. Lupin appeared in his doorway, face flushed and breathing heavily as though he’d been running. His jacket was unbuttoned and his hair was disheveled, and he had to pause to catch his breath before he could speak. 

“I’m so sorry, I’m late, Professor,” he said, giving Severus a wide-eyed look of apology. “Is it too late to get started? I can reschedule if you have another appointment.”

Severus forced himself to look up slowly and keep his expression dispassionate to counteract his traitorous mind throwing up ideas about other, more intimate situations in which Mr. Lupin might end up sweaty and breathless. 

“No, you’re the only student who’s asked to see me about the paper,” he said, waving negligently at the chairs across from him. “Come in and sit down, Mr. Lupin.” 

“Thank you!” Lupin smiled and moved quickly to take the seat Severus indicated, dropping down into it with a little groan. “I ran all the way from the student union,” he said, moving his satchel onto his lap and opening it to rummage around in it. “I had only stopped by to pick up sandwich, but I ran into one of the other graduate students.” He looked up, giving Severus rueful smile. “It figures the first person to ask me out on a date in longer than I can remember would be completely unsuitable.”

Severus refused to acknowledge the flare of ire as anything related to jealousy and resolutely chalked it up to annoyance at Mr. Lupin being late and keeping him waiting. 

“That’s unfortunate,” he said coolly. “It’s probably for the best, however. You likely won’t have much time for socializing for the next few years anyway.”

“Well, I’d make time for the right person,” Mr. Lupin replied. He pulled out a notebook and pen from his satchel. “I don’t know if you know Dora Tonks, but _she_ definitely isn’t it, and it took me a few minutes to convince her of that, which is why I’m late. It’s not the pink hair, either; she’s only a little more than half my age and female. I think the last bit was what finally got through to her.”

Severus froze, staring at Mr. Lupin as he tried to convince himself that he hadn’t really heard what he had just heard. Gay? Mr. Lupin was _gay_? Oh, God... 

It took all of Severus’ will power not to groan and drop his head in his hands. He’d had a difficult enough time maintaining a professional distance when he thought Mr. Lupin was straight, but now... Well, he would have to be the consummate professional and not let his guard slip; it was too dangerous, and he had worked too hard to risk his position over an attractive student. 

Drawing himself up, he fixed Mr. Lupin with a stern look. “I thought you were here to discuss your paper, not your social life.”

Blue eyes widened as Mr. Lupin stared at him surprise. “Yes, yes, I am,” he replied, then hurriedly opened the notebook and settled it on his knee. “I really am sorry, Professor. I know your time is valuable, and I won’t be late again.”

“See that you aren’t,” Severus replied frostily. “Now what exactly did you want to see me about?”

Mr. Lupin looked bewildered for a moment, and then an expression that seemed oddly like desperation passed over his features. He looked down at his notebook quickly. “Er... formatting. Of the paper,” he said vaguely. “I mean, did you have a particular style you’d prefer for the submission? Fonts or anything like that?”

“Standard MLA format. I believe I went over that in class,” Severus said in his most quelling tone. “Really, Mr. Lupin, I thought you were more conscientious than that.”

Mr. Lupin’s head snapped back as though Severus had struck him, and blue eyes searched Severus’ face. “I am,” he said, and he seemed at a loss for words for a moment. “I’m sorry, Professor. I wasn’t trying to waste your time. Er... I’ll just go finish the paper and email you any other questions.”

“That would be best.” Severus schooled his features into his best impassive stare and raised one eyebrow. “Is there anything else?”

“Um... no, no, I don’t think so.” Mr. Lupin rose to his feet, for once not smiling. His expression was somber as he tucked his notebook away again, and he seemed to hesitate rather awkwardly, his normal self-assurance apparently having deserted him for the moment. “I... I really am sorry I was late,” he said again, as he backed toward the door, watching Severus every step of the way as though still trying to puzzle out Severus’ behavior.

“Fine, fine.” Severus turned back to his computer screen, effectively dismissing Mr. Lupin before he could get distracted by blue eyes and broad shoulders again. 

There was silence for a moment. “Have a good rest of your day,” Mr. Lupin said, then there was the sound of retreating footsteps, and Severus was alone once more.

As soon as he was certain Mr. Lupin was well away, Severus slumped in his seat and rubbed his forehead, wishing the semester was over already. He’d never had to deal with an attraction to a student before, especially not to a student who was his own age _and_ gay - and seemingly determined to talk to him at every given opportunity. He would simply have to find a way to deter Mr. Lupin, that was all. Not that he thought there was a remote chance that Mr. Lupin was interested in him, but it would be easier for him to avoid making a complete fool of himself by letting his attraction show if he spent as little time around Mr. Lupin as possible.

With a weary sigh, he stared at the computer screen for a moment, and then he sat up straight and forced himself to open the next email, pushing all thoughts of handsome students aside. He had work to do, and it was best if he got on with it instead of fantasizing about what could have been.


	3. Chapter 3

Gloom settled over Severus like a black mantle, and his grumpiness escalated as his depression deepened. He tried to tell himself he had no reason to be depressed; he hadn’t done anything so stupid as fall in love with a student, after all. He’d been attracted, nothing more, and he reminded himself he’d had a narrow escape since fraternizing with students in _that way_ was against school policy. 

Somehow, it wasn’t a comfort. 

Somehow, his mind kept straying to his solitary life and wondering “what if”. Somehow, his mind kept wondering what it would be like to have someone who was a friend and a partner, someone intelligent and attractive who shared his interests and understood his focused fascination with folklore. He was starting to realize how empty his life was, a never-ended cycle of classes, papers, and books with students flowing in and out of his classroom like water, never staying. His best friend lived hours away, and he had no close friends in town, only colleagues. He hadn’t had a lover in longer than he could remember, either.

That only made him more gloomy and grumpy until he felt as if he was walking around under a black cloud, and it made him even more eager for the semester to be over so he wouldn’t have to look at Mr. Lupin and think about all he was missing out on any longer. He grew resentful, too, since Mr. Lupin was handsome, amiable, and charming enough to find a partner easily, unlike Severus, whom one past lover had called “an acquired taste”, which he was fairly certain was _not_ a compliment. Resentment turned into anger, until he found himself answering all of Mr. Lupin’s remarks in class with quelling disdain, trying to shut him up as well as ignore him. He knew he was taking out his anger on the wrong person, but it was easier than facing the truth about how he felt about both Mr. Lupin and himself. In a few more weeks, Mr. Lupin would be gone, and then Severus’ life would return to normal; in the meantime, it helped to have a convenient target. 

Mr. Lupin, for his part, had gone from apologetic to puzzled to impassive in the face of Severus’ attacks. He’d tried to approach Severus a few times, but when Severus made it obvious he wanted nothing to do with him, Lupin backed down. His lively participation in class became a stony faced silence, and if he received any more stories from Sallie Ann, he didn’t bother to share them. 

Just when Severus thought that Mr. Lupin was probably looking as much forward to the end of the semester as he was himself, the Folklore class had its midterm examination. And during his office hours after the class in which Severus handed back the graded exams, Mr. Lupin broke his silence.

The sound of footsteps entering his office as the first clue Severus had, and when he looked up from his computer it was to find a grim-faced Remus Lupin closing his office door. There was nothing of the boyish friendliness which Severus had first seen on Lupin’s face; instead, his blue eyes were dark and flashing with anger. He strode across the room to Severus’ desk, placing his hands on the surface and leaning across it so that he could stare at Severus coldly.

“I am willing to put up with quite a lot from people,” Mr. Lupin said, a hint of a growl underlying his voice. “I’ve put up with your cutting comments, with your sarcasm, with your derision for my answers. You’re the professor, and it’s your class, so it’s your right to teach it how you wish, even if it borders on the unprofessional. But you’ve gone too far, _Doctor_ Snape. I draw the line at having my grade deliberately reduced simply because you don’t like me.”

Severus lifted his chin haughtily, meeting Mr. Lupin’s gaze with stony indifference; he’d dealt with disgruntled students before - although not for the same reason - and he was not intimidated by Mr. Lupin’s obvious attempts to seem overbearing. 

“Your grade was reduced because you did sub-par work,” he replied. 

Mr. Lupin laughed, but there was no amusement in the sound. “Oh, really?” he asked, lifting a brow. “I beg to differ, Professor. I suspect I have worked harder in this course, paid more attention to your requirements, and received less credit for it than any other student you’ve ever taught. If there is anything sub-par in this situation, it’s not _my_ work.”

Severus shrugged negligently and spread his hands. “You aren’t the first student to be dissatisfied with my exacting standards, and you won’t be the last. I made copious notes on your exam, Mr. Lupin, which should be enough justification for anyone as to why you received a C.” 

“Copious notes that are nothing but bullshit.” Mr. Lupin straightened, crossing his arms over his chest and giving Severus a look of pure disgust. “I checked with Mark Wilson after class, just to make sure I wasn’t being paranoid in the face of your obvious hatred of me. As I suspected, we had very similar answers to several questions. Yet mine were consistently marked at least twenty percent lower than his, even though we said virtually the same things. Your reasoning doesn’t stand up to close examination.”

Shoving back his chair, Severus rose to his feet and squared off with Mr. Lupin, his own ire rising - and after weeks of bottled up frustration, there was quite a lot to rise. “My grading methods are equitable,” he snapped, glaring across the desk at Mr. Lupin. “Similar and virtual are not the same as exact, and if there is a marked difference in your answers and grades, there is a reason why. It isn’t my problem if you are too dense to see it. I suggest you start developing a more discerning eye or your own students will probably end up with all As. Then again, perhaps they already do since you seem to have a pathological need to be liked!” 

Severus’ anger didn’t seem to rattle Lupin in the slightest, and he looked at Severus with the same sort of expression with which he might have regarded an insect. “Despite your low opinion of me, _professor_ , I’m neither dense nor stupid, and if I prefer to be liked, it’s only because usually _I_ happen to like most people. And I already know exactly why you are treating me as you are... I’m just wondering if Professor Dumbledore might find it interesting to know as well.”

Severus froze, his eyes growing wide as his blood turned to ice water. Mr. Lupin had realized how attracted Severus was to him? Was he going to be accused of sexual harassment or of violating the university’s policy? 

“You don’t know anything,” he said hoarsely, hoping to bluff his way through. 

“Oh?” Lupin snorted in derision. “Do you honestly think I’m a complete idiot? You didn’t seem to have a problem with me until the day I was late for our meeting. In fact, you seemed quite interested in the stories I was able to obtain for you. You weren’t effusive, to be sure, but you were _professional_ , and I’d even thought you’d begun to relax a bit with me. Then after I tell you about my encounter with another graduate student, you suddenly become the most insufferable, critical, biased instructor I’ve ever had! I’d have to be blind not to realize why! Your mask isn’t quite as impenetrable as you like to pretend it is.”

 _Oh, shit_! Severus felt fear escalating into panic. Mr. Lupin _had_ realized Severus was attracted to him! He shook his head vehemently, trying to come up with some kind of plausible denial. 

“I’ve no idea what you’re talking about,” he said, his scowl deepening. “Your personal life is of no interest to me, and it has no bearing on what happens in my classroom.” 

“Right, keep telling yourself that. You obviously have a capacity for self-deception that’s even greater than my supposedly pathological desire to be liked.” Mr. Lupin dropped his arms and glared at Severus. “Well, let me tell you, Professor Snape, I don’t intend to let this stand. If it were just a matter of personality differences, I’d shrug it off and go on, figuring you were a hopelessly bitter man who had to disagree with everyone simply because that way, you could always be right. But you made this personal, so I’m going to fight it. And if things you’d rather weren’t known are brought up in the process, you’ll have only yourself to blame.”

“What are you going to do?” Severus sneered, folding his arms across his chest. “Go running to the chair and whine that I was mean to you? Go ahead and try to fight whatever it is you think is going on here. I have a sterling reputation, and no one will believe your outrageous claims!” 

“Maybe you’ve been stuck here with your ivory tower intellectual associates for too long, professor,” Lupin said, giving a bitter laugh. “But the world has changed. Yes, I’ll go to the chair, but not to whine - to _complain_. Formally. The days where narrow-minded bigotry was overlooked simply because people were afraid to speak up are coming to an end, in case you hadn’t heard.” He lifted his chin. “Homophobia is as vile as racism or sexism or religious intolerance, and my desire to have peace in my life isn’t greater than my hatred of injustice. So yes, I’m going to fight you - no matter what it costs!”

Severus gaped at him, too stunned to speak as the implications of Mr. Lupin’s words sank in - and then his temper erupted with all the heat of a banked volcano. He had been carrying this burden around for weeks, and now Lupin was accusing _him_ of homophobia. It was too much to bear, and he stormed around his desk and rounded on Lupin furiously. 

“You idiot!” he snarled. “This has nothing to do with homophobia! You don’t know what you’re talking about, and I refuse to listen to any more of this nonsense. Get out of my office and take your ridiculous accusations with you!”

“No!” Lupin’s eyes flashed with heat to equal Severus’. “You’ve been treating me like scum since the day you found out I’m gay! You’ve belittled me in class, you’ve done everything you can to make me feel as though my presence and my opinions are less than my peers, and you deliberately gave me a low grade on my midterm, no doubt in an attempt to make me drop your class rather than ruin my GPA. Go on, tell me I’m wrong! Tell me that your opinion of me didn’t change and that you didn’t begin to treat me like shit the moment you discovered I’m gay!”

Severus couldn’t really deny the truth of that accusation, but Lupin was way off-base about the reason behind it. If he wasn’t so angry and frustrated and resentful himself, he might have been able to compose a logical rebuttal, but he wasn’t thinking calmly or rationally. On the contrary, his damned libido was fixated on how sexy Lupin was when he was angry with his cheeks flushed and his eyes blazing with passion, and that only pissed off Severus even more. 

“Yes, I want you to drop my class!” he exclaimed, too angry to censor his words any longer. “I want you out of my class and out of my life because you’ve done nothing but pester me since the first day of class. Maybe I should file a sexual harassment suit against _you_ , given your behavior. Or do you always invite your professors out to have coffee and bat your lashes at them while pretending rapt interest in their every word?” 

“I wasn’t pretending!” Lupin denied vehemently, getting right in his face and poking Severus in the chest with a finger to emphasize his words. “I wanted to spend time with you, get to know you, even help you out with your work because it interested me, and _your_ interest in it and passion about it are damned attractive! You didn’t have to accept. You could have told me to get lost, but instead you used me and took what I had to offer, then cut me off dead. Fool that I am, I thought you might be actually starting to _like_ me. I never did one damned inappropriate thing except mention I’m not interested in women. That was when you became a homophobic jerk who is determined to punish me for daring to show an interest in you! When was the last time someone kissed you, professor? Or does the acid you spew so easily burn everyone the same way you’ve burned me?”

Inadvertently, Severus flicked his gaze to Lupin’s mouth and tried not to remember how his rebellious mind had plagued him with fantasies about kissing Lupin. His throat went dry, and he fought the urge to take a step back and put some distance between himself and the aggressive male energy that was rolling off Lupin and buffeting against him - and arousing him unbearably. 

“That’s none of your business,” he retorted hoarsely, his breathing accelerating as he stared at Lupin, wanting to push him away and run, but unable to muster the will to do so. 

Lupin stared at him - stared _into_ him - and then something about his demeanor changed subtly. It was no less aggressive, but now his stance was predatory rather than belligerent, as though Lupin were coiling himself to pounce. Blue eyes narrowed, and Lupin’s nostrils flared as if he were inhaling Severus’ scent. 

“I’m about to make it my business,” Lupin growled, and before Severus knew what was happening, Lupin had stepped closer, his hands coming up to trap Severus’ face as he captured Severus’ lips in a harsh, demanding kiss.

Severus froze, scarcely able to process what was happening as his senses were overwhelmed by the warmth of Lupin’s hands bringing his skin to life and the feel of Lupin’s mouth on his, as if he was being claimed. He _knew_ it was wrong, knew he ought to push Lupin away, but his body was already swaying toward Lupin, and his hands were grabbing Lupin’s shoulders for support, not shoving Lupin back so he could issue a vitriolic set-down that would settle the matter once and for all. It was stupid and dangerous and potentially career-wrecking, but he hadn’t felt such a powerful attraction in years - perhaps ever - and he wanted nothing more than to let go and see what happened. Torn between duty and desire, he let the kiss continue, parting his lips and giving in to Lupin’s silent demand.

Lupin made a sound of satisfaction and immediately moved to deepen the kiss, his tongue twining around Severus’ as he took complete control. He explored Severus’ mouth hungrily, devouring him as though he were a starving man and Severus was a feast. Severus felt the edge of his desk behind him, and Lupin pressed against him, the evidence of his arousal unmistakable. Lupin held him trapped there, pinned between his desk and Lupin’s equally hard body, as Lupin continued his demanding assault on Severus’ senses as though unwilling to settle for anything less than Severus’ complete and utter surrender.

At last, Severus found the will to break away from the kiss, and he shook his head as he nudged Lupin’s shoulders. “No, this must stop,” he said, although in a far less forceful and convincing tone than he would have liked. “Someone could come by. Someone could overhear. The university has a policy about this...”

“Screw university policy,” Lupin replied. “You’re a fraud, Severus Snape, and you’re as gay as I am. Which I’ve thought from the beginning.” There was no mistaking the gleam of desire in his eyes or the way he thrust against Severus suggestively. “I want you, and you want me, too. Deny it if you must, but I’ll call you a liar.”

“I haven’t denied anything, and I am not a fraud,” Severus retorted, drawing himself up proudly. Lupin’s words gave him the strength to shove Lupin back and put some space between them. “I’ve never passed myself off as straight, but I haven’t advertised that I’m gay either. It’s a non-issue.”

“The hell it is!” Lupin moved right back into Severus’ personal space, gripping his shoulders with surprising strength and staring at him implacably. Nothing in Lupin’s character up until now had hinted at this level of forcefulness or the easy way Lupin stepped into a position of dominance; obviously it was something he kept well hidden behind his friendly smile and easygoing ways. “It’s why you treated me as you did, isn’t it? You _are_ attracted to me, and then you freaked out when you found out it was possible I could be attracted to you, too. I think that makes it a pretty damned big issue, considering you are quite willing to offer me and my grade up as a sacrifice on the altar of your fear.”

Severus felt his knees go weak at the display, but he knew he couldn’t possibly give in, no matter how tempting it was, and he shook his head, his features set in implacable lines. 

“Fine!” he spat, pushing at Lupin’s shoulders again. “I’ll re-grade your exam, if that’s what it will take to make you happy. Now let me go and get out!” 

“No.” There was no ambiguity in that single word. “This isn’t about my grade any longer. This is about _us_.” He smiled in a predatory fashion, his voice dropping to a low drawl. “I want you. I want to have you beneath me, naked and flushed and so aroused that you’re trembling in desperation. I want to hear you crying out my name as I take you, filling you and giving you more pleasure than you’ve ever known. _That’s_ what it will take to make me happy, and I suspect it’ll make you happy, too.”

Severus’ dark eyes grew wide and round as he gaped at Lupin, stunned into silence by Lupin’s blunt words - words he’d never had directed toward him before in his life. Heat detonated in the pit of his stomach, and for one wild moment, he longed to fling caution to the wind and give Lupin exactly what he wanted, but that would be a colossal mistake for both of them, especially Severus. 

“We - I - can’t,” he said hoarsely, shaking his head in vehement denial. “You’re my student. If anyone ever found out, I could lose my job. An afternoon tryst isn’t worth that. Besides...” He narrowed his eyes and peered at Lupin suspiciously. “How do I know you wouldn’t go running to the chair anyway or use sex to blackmail me later?” 

“Because I’m dropping your class,” Lupin replied, smiling at Severus almost sympathetically. He moved one hand to Severus’ cheek, stroking it gently. “And I don’t want just an afternoon tryst. If one-off sex was all I wanted, there is an entire campus of willing bodies out there to choose from. But I’m long past sowing my wild oats. Severus.” His smile became a grin as he said Severus’ name, drawing out the beginning and ending consonants into a sibilant hiss, making it sound seductive and sexy. “I said I want _you_ , and that’s want I meant. Not just your body... all of you.”

Severus fought to keep his jaw from dropping at that, and he found himself dumbfounded again; he couldn’t remember ever being rendered speechless twice in as many minutes, and he wasn’t sure he liked it. 

“I don’t remember giving permission to address me by name,” he said, lifting his chin haughtily. As off-balance as he felt, he thought perhaps the best defense was a good offense to help himself regain some measure of control over the situation. “As for the rest, it’s all nonsense. You barely know me, and I don’t believe you really want... what you say you want,” he added, unable to bring himself to speak the words. Words he knew couldn’t possibly be true.

Lupin seemed undeterred. “Fine, then I’ll just call you Professor.” He said the final word in a husky, bedroom voice, making it blatantly seductive. Then he drew in a breath, growing more somber. “I know you well enough, and I was attracted to you from the moment I walked into your classroom. I took one look at you and felt as though I’d taken a punch in the gut. So I decided to go slowly, to try to woo you and seduce you. Which makes you right about the invitations to coffee and the time I was spending around you, getting to know you and trying to let you get to know me. But my offers about the stories were sincere, not just because I wanted to please you. I think what you are doing to preserve the Gullah culture is fantastic, and I want to help; it was just icing on the cake that in doing so I could get closer to you. But...” he shrugged slightly. “Things went pear-shaped when you found out I’m gay. I wouldn’t be so blunt with you now except for the fact that I know you’re deliberately pushing me away. And I’m not going to allow that to happen.”

“You don’t have a choice,” Severus retorted, drawing back from Lupin as much as he could and folding his arms across his chest. As little as he wanted to admit it, Lupin’s words were offering him a temptation he found it difficult to resist, and the worst part was, he knew if they had met under different circumstances, he might not have tried to resist at all. “I’m not going to risk my career for sex, and frankly, neither should you. You’ve still got a dissertation to finish and the whole tenure-track process ahead of you, and if you get a reputation before you’ve even gotten started, you’ll find it that much harder to get a job in an already competitive field.” 

Amazingly, Lupin only smiled. “I’m not worried about the job,” he replied, stroking Severus’ cheek again. “Remember that job I told you about, the one where I spent years at it, although it wasn’t what I really wanted to do? Well... it may not have been as fulfilling as teaching is, but it was lucrative. _Very_ lucrative. Have you ever heard of a game called _Marauders Map_?”

Severus drew back from the caress, frowning, not because he wanted to but because he thought he ought to, and he tried to remember why the name sounded familiar. He didn’t play games himself aside from the Trivial Pursuit tournaments the department held once a year or so, but he thought he remembered some of his freshmen students talking about it. 

“I’ve heard of it,” he said. “I don’t know anything about it, however.” 

Lupin shrugged. “You don’t have to, really, but it’s an online adventure role-playing game with thousands of players. The company that invented it is called MarauderSoft... and I was one of the founding members of the company. It was all the brainchild of my friend James, but he needed a technical writer, and he gave me a job. It took years of endless toil, but we did it, and I recently sold him back my interest in the company. For a sum large enough to keep me comfortable for the rest of my life, if I’m careful. But what’s important is that I’m looking for something to do that is fulfilling, something more worthwhile than just making money. Yet I’m not going to pursue it to the point of ignoring something like the way I feel about you.”

“That’s all very well and good for you, but what about me?” Severus retorted indignantly, poking Lupin’s chest with his forefinger. “I don’t have a comfortable nest egg that would allow me to coast for the rest of my life if I lost my job. I spent most of my life poor, Mr. Lupin, and I am _not_ going to risk my job security, especially not for an ill-advised fling.” 

He saw Lupin’s eyes darken, and then Lupin leaned toward him. Instead of another kiss, however, Lupin put his lips close to Severus’ ear and growled softly, running his nose along the side of Severus’ throat. “So we keep it a secret and make sure no one finds out. Or I leave the university altogether.” Sharp teeth nipped lightly at Severus’ skin. “Everything in life is a risk. How will you ever know how rich the rewards could be if you let fear of failure keep you from ever taking a chance?”

“I am _not_ afraid of failure.” The words should have come out as a sharp rejoinder, but somehow, they ended up sounding more than a little breathless despite the fact that Severus tried to draw back from the arousing nips before he could do something foolish like fling his arms around Lupin. “You’re talking nonsense. You can’t possibly leave the university at this point unless you intend to abandon your degree altogether, which would be a tremendous waste of time and money. No other university is going to be eager to accept an ABD student when it means they won’t get as much tuition money as they would from someone just starting out,” he pointed out. “And keeping it secret?” He let out a harsh bark of laughter. “Academia is a breeding ground for gossip, and I’m not without enemies.”

Lupin moved one hand down Severus’ body to his hip, fingers kneading the flesh there as Lupin continued to nuzzle his neck. Lupin gave another deep growl, the sound rumbling in his chest in a way that Severus could feel, and then Lupin’s warm tongue swiped at Severus’ throat. “Aren’t you even a little curious what it would be like between us?” Lupin asked, his breath ghosting over Severus’ skin. “Don’t you want to know what it would be like to have someone worshiping your body, staking a claim on you, making you lose all your formidable control? If you aren’t afraid of failure, maybe you’re afraid of how much I might make you feel.”

Lupin’s words made Severus want to moan and sag against his desk in surrender, but his rational mind was at war with his libido, reminding him of the dangers of getting involved with a student. 

“I told you what I’m afraid of: losing my job, tarnishing my reputation, and becoming a figure of ridicule in a field in which I’ve finally gained respect,” he replied, finding himself tilting his chin despite his best intentions to resist.

Lupin took advantage of his weakness, pressing open mouthed kisses over Severus’ skin. “Then we won’t let that happen,” Lupin murmured. “We’ll be careful. And if anything happens, put the blame all on me.” He lifted his head, looking at Severus with eyes that were dark with banked heat. “Look... I wanted to go slowly with you, and I’m still willing to do that, if it means you’ll take a chance. How about a date? Just a meal out together, or a movie, or whatever you’d like to do. So that you can see that we can do this and get away with it.”

Severus knew he ought to say no. That was the smart, safe thing to do, especially considering how long and hard he had worked to reach this point in his life. He knew damned well that if anyone found out that he was dating Remus Lupin, the university wouldn’t look at the circumstances; they would only see that he was violating the policy about teacher-student fraternization, and he would pay a high price for what would probably end up being a short-lived fling. Lupin didn’t know him, and once Lupin _did_ know him, Lupin would find sustaining a relationship just as difficult as Severus’ past lovers had - and the fling would end the same way. All that risk for nothing! 

But he couldn’t easily dismiss the strength of the attraction he felt for Lupin, ill-advised as it may be, or how empty his life had seemed of late. Part of him wanted to take a risk and see if they could get away with it, and it was that part of him that made him nod at last, slowly and reluctantly. 

“It won’t work,” he said quellingly. “I’m not the relationship type, but if you want a date, then you may have _a_ date.”

Lupin grinned from ear to ear, as though Severus had just wrapped up the moon and given to him as a gift. “That’s a start,” he said eagerly. “I’ll take it. Tonight.”

“ _Tonight_?” Severus gaped at him, astonished. “Are you serious?”

“Absolutely,” Lupin replied, lifting a brow although his eyes sparkled with humor. “I told you I’m not stupid. I’m not going to give you any time for you to talk yourself out of it or try to come up with some excuse to avoid it. We can go out to dinner, or if you aren’t comfortable with being out in public, I’ll cook for you at my house. And I don’t live in a neighborhood where any students are, so you don’t have to worry about being spotted.”

Severus wasn’t sure which posed the higher risk: being in public where someone who knew them might see them or being alone at Lupin’s place. Either way, he wasn’t comfortable, but he supposed privacy was the better option of the two. 

“Fine, I’ll go to your place,” he said grudgingly. 

“Great!” Lupin nodded, something that looked like a gleam of triumph appearing in his eyes before disappearing in the next blink. “You have my address from the faculty roster, right? How does six o’clock sound?”

“Fine.” Severus pushed at Lupin’s shoulders again, trying to get him to back off at last. “One date. If it’s a failure, then I expect you to drop the subject for good, and I don’t want you touching me or talking about sex again.” 

Lupin stepped back, looking as though he wanted to argue, but then he nodded. “Fine,” he replied, echoing Severus’ tone. “But if it isn’t a failure, then I expect _you_ to be honest and give things between us a chance.”

Wrapping his arms around his midsection, Severus nodded tersely, already having second thoughts about the wisdom of what he’d agreed to do. But he wasn’t a coward, and he wouldn’t turn tail and run from one date.

“Great, then, I’ll see you at six.” Lupin smiled, stepping closer again, his eyes focused on Severus’ lips. He leaned in slowly, closer and closer, the warmth of his body overlapping Severus’ as though he were about to kiss him again. But at the last moment, he moved, his lips grazing past Severus’ cheek. “Don’t be late. I’ll be waiting,” he growled in Severus’ ear. Then he stepped back and turned toward the door.

Severus watched Lupin go in silence, breathing a sigh of relief when the door was closed and he was alone again at last. He skirted around his desk and sat down, but he only managed to stare blankly at the computer screen, unable to focus. He had no idea what he’d gotten himself into, but he hoped he could get himself out of it again with a minimum of damage.

* * *

At six o’clock sharp, Severus stood outside Lupin’s front door and rang the doorbell. He was a little assured that he probably wouldn’t be spotted since Lupin lived in a neighborhood that was far too nice for students to live in even if they split the costs, and he didn’t think any of his colleagues lived here either; they tended to live closer to campus and in more modest circumstances. Not that Lupin’s house was ostentatious, but it spoke more eloquently than words about the truth behind Lupin’s claim about having been a founder of a well-known game manufacturing company. 

He had debated whether to bring a bottle of wine, but he decided against it; he also hadn’t dressed up too much, choosing to wear plain jeans and a plainer black sweater. He wasn’t out to seduce Lupin, after all, or contribute to the success of the date. If Lupin wanted it to work, then he would indeed have to _work_. 

It took only a few moments for the door to open, and Lupin stood on the other side, smiling at him with delight. “Right on time,” he said, stepping back and beckoning for Severus to enter. “Come on in. I’ve nearly finished everything, so we can sit down to eat in just a few minutes.”

Lupin was wearing close-fitting jeans again, this time topped with a dark green sweater, and he was barefoot, his steps silent as he closed the door and moved across the hardwood foyer. “If you don’t mind, I thought we’d eat in the kitchen,” he continued. “It’s my favorite room in the house.”

“It hardly matters to me where we eat,” Severus replied, folding his arms across his chest as he followed Lupin through the house and studiously avoided looking at either Lupin’s bare feet or his backside. 

“Then I suppose it’s good that I picked the place I like most,” Lupin said easily, tossing a grin over his shoulder at Severus. He stepped through a doorway, and the scent of butter and garlic were immediately detectable, even before Severus saw the pan of lightly toasted bread sitting on the counter.

Lupin’s kitchen was large and decorated in warm tones of crimson and gold, with gleaming copper pans hanging from a fixture over the central island. There was a double wall oven, a refrigerator and a freezer, and in addition to a regular set of gas stove burners set into a counter, half of the island was taken up with a flat, built-in griddle. There were two place settings next to the griddle, and a bottle of wine already opened and breathing. 

“Have a seat,” Lupin said, pointing to the high stools with backs which were pulled up to the island. “I’ll get the last bits, and we’ll have dinner. Oh, would you pour the wine? I also have sodas and tea if you’d prefer that.”

Severus gave a noncommittal grunt and went to pick up the wine bottle; if nothing else, perhaps the wine could help dissolve the lead weight he felt in the pit of his stomach. He poured generously into the glasses that were set out and waiting, and then he took a seat on one of the stools, waiting and watching dispassionately. 

Lupin turned away, crossing to the refrigerator and taking out a platter that he’d obviously prepared earlier. There were two thick steaks on it and a variety of cut up vegetables, as well as a pile of raw, peeled shrimp. He placed the platter on the island, then picked up a small bottle of oil and poured some on the grill.

“I hope you like teppan yaki,” he said, tilting his chin toward the tray. “I made garlic bread, too, which isn’t Japanese but has the advantage of being tasty and filling in case you don’t like anything else I make.” He smiled at Severus and pointed to the bottle of wine with his spatula. “I hope you like the wine. I bought it a few years ago, and I’ve been saving it for a special occasion. I think this definitely qualifies.”

Severus gave a disparaging snort. “Oh, please. Don’t start by claiming this is some sort of magical evening destined to launch an amazing affair. This is one date. A first and mostly likely a last date. It is not a special occasion by any stretch of the imagination.” 

Lupin looked at him, his expression somber. “It’s special to me,” he said, beginning to place the meats and vegetables on different parts of the griddle, where they began to sizzle faintly. “And all amazing affairs had to begin with a first date, didn’t they? If you give it a chance, that is. Usually a date involves an effort on the part of both people, not one person attempting to humor another who is determined to be unhappy no matter what he does.”

“The key word, Mr. Lupin, is ‘affair’,” Severus retorted sharply. “A short-lived event. Whether you’re willing to accept it or not, I’m jeopardizing my livelihood over something that won’t last, and I still haven’t figured out why I’m bothering to go through the motions. I’m old enough to know better,” he added, a trace of bitterness in his voice. 

“An affair doesn’t have to be short lived. In fact, I think the term ‘life-long love affair’ is quite appealing,” Lupin replied softly. He didn’t try to make light of the situation, and he met Severus’ gaze directly. “I do accept that what you are doing is risky. For both of us, but yes, more for you than for me. Which is why I’ll repeat the offer I made earlier: I’ll transfer to another school so that you aren’t at risk. I don’t care about the time and the money, I think you can see that. If I have to start over again, I will. Which I hope proves to you that I _am_ serious about this. I am willing to redo the last several years of my life in order to have a chance with you, Severus Snape. And if you think that I’m not serious about it, I will call the registrar tomorrow in your presence and drop out officially.”

“In God’s name, _why_?” Severus demanded, frowning at Lupin in abject bewilderment. “You know little about me - too little to make such drastic changes for a non-existent relationship that has little chance of lasting even if it gets off the ground. It makes no sense!”

“Why does it have to make sense?” Lupin pushed at the food on the griddle, then wiped his hands on a towel and moved around the island to stand beside Severus’ stool. “And it’s my life to change, if I feel the risk is worth it, isn’t it? But if you must have an explanation, let me put it in a way you can understand.”

Lupin turned the stool, which swiveled under the seat, so that Severus was facing him. He reached out, framing Severus’ face with his hands and gazing deeply into Severus’ eyes. “Call it stupid or crazy, but I was attracted to you from the moment I saw you. And I’m not talking about just physical attraction, though that’s definitely a part of it. You fascinate me and challenge me and frustrate me and make me _think_. You aren’t like anyone else I’ve ever met, and I want a chance to find out how good we could be together. I’m almost forty years old, and you’re the first person in all that time who has attracted me so much that I want to throw caution to the winds. You’re the first one who makes me feel like I want to make a claim on you, to push you and possess you until you admit that you’re mine.”

Severus shook his head, scarcely able to process the fact that Lupin was saying such things to him. _About_ him. No one had ever spoken to him like that before; on the contrary, he’d been called derogatory names throughout school, and as he grew older, he learned to keep people at a distance because it was safer that way. His colleagues tended to write him off as being prickly, anti-social, and stuck up, and that was fine because he wasn’t fond of socializing to begin with. 

“It _is_ crazy,” he said. “Everyone I’ve been involved with in the past has called me difficult to get along with. I doubt you’ll be any different. You’ll find out that they were right, and I’m not cut out for relationships, and that will be the end of it. I’m not yours. I don’t belong with anyone.” 

“You’re wrong,” Lupin replied softly. “So very, very wrong. You belong with me, and by God, I’m going to prove it to you!”

With that, he leaned down and captured Severus’ lips with his. This kiss was just as passionate as the first one, but instead of being fueled by aggression, Lupin seemed intent on seduction, on beguiling and tempting Severus into yielding to him instead of simply demanding it. He nipped at Severus’ lower lip, then swiped at it with his tongue as he buried his fingers in Severus’ hair, holding Severus in place so that he could assault his senses, tasting and teasing him as he hummed softly, as though kissing Severus were the most wonderful thing in the world.

Severus found it far more difficult to resist than the kiss in his office, especially once his body began to wake up and respond in ways it hadn’t done in years; he could feel heat kindling within him, and although he wanted to remain strong and push Lupin away, he found himself reaching out instead, sliding his arms around Lupin’s waist as he parted his lips on a soft, reluctant moan. 

Lupin seemed quite pleased with that, for he didn’t hesitate to deepen the kiss, invading Severus’ mouth with his tongue and claiming it with a growl of triumph. Then Lupin nudged Severus’ legs apart with his knee, moving closer, caressing the back of Severus’ head as he continued with the kiss, slow and deep and almost tender. Part of Severus wanted to relax and enjoy it; he hadn’t been kissed in a long time, and he couldn’t deny, even to himself, that he was attracted to Lupin. But he couldn’t relax, not completely, not when he felt like he was on the verge of making a tremendous mistake; instead, he let the kiss continue for a moment longer before drawing back. 

“One kiss doesn’t prove anything,” he said, his voice low and husky. 

“One kiss can lead to another and another,” Lupin replied with a gentle smile. He sifted his fingers through Severus’ hair, and then he pulled back with obvious reluctance. “And I don’t care what other people have said about you in the past or if they were too selfish to recognize your true value. All that matters is that _I_ can. You’ll find I’m a very persistent man, Professor, and I’m not easily dissuaded because I think something will be challenging. Things worth having are seldom easily gotten, and I think you’re worth it.” His eyes gleamed at Severus suddenly. “Besides, you remind me of dark chocolate - perhaps slightly sharp and bitter at first, but then rich and satisfying the more familiar you become with the taste.”

Severus gave a derisive snort at that, but deep down, he liked that description far better than being described as “an acquired taste”. Besides, he liked dark chocolate better than milk chocolate anyway. 

“I still think you’re crazy and more than a little full of yourself,” he replied, and then he glanced over at the griddle. “I also think you should pay more attention to dinner than to me, or else it’s going to burn.” 

“You’re more important than steak, but I’ll let it go for now,” Lupin replied, before gently running his forefinger along the length of Severus’ nose and stepping away. He returned to the griddle, flipped the steaks, and gazed at Severus with a mischievous smile. “Besides, I turned it down just in case. So how do you want your steak?”

“Medium,” Severus replied, relaxing a little now that Lupin had moved out of his personal space, and he reached for the wine glass. 

He was finding the whole situation unsettling, and he didn’t like being unsettled; he preferred being the one who had the upper hand in any given situation, but he was at a loss here, and he wasn’t certain what he could do to regain control. At this point, he wondered if claiming the date had been a failure and refusing to see Lupin again would even work, given how damned persistent Lupin was being, and that made him scowl into his glass. 

“How exactly do you intend to measure the success or failure of this date?” he asked at last. “I assume I’ll get _some_ say in the matter.” 

“Half, actually,” Lupin replied easily. He picked up a bottle of soy sauce and poured some on the vegetables, which were sizzling on the griddle and giving off enticing odors. He glanced up from his task and gave Severus a serious, direct look. “Although if you consider it a failure, I suppose it must be. But you have to be honest with yourself and with me. All I want is a fair chance to prove to you that there can be something really good between us and to convince you that the idiots you were with before weren’t worthy of you, but _I_ am.” He chuckled. “And if that makes me a bit full of myself, as you claimed, so be it. I have spent too many years alone, wanting the comfort and stability of a lasting relationship, to toss away this opportunity without trying my damnedest to convince you to give us a chance.”

“Hmph!” Severus folded his arms across his chest and fixed Lupin with a disapproving look, despite the fact that Lupin’s words resonated a little too strongly for his liking, given how much he had been dwelling on the empty state of his own life of late. “Does that mean you’ll use your video game riches to support me when I’m stripped of tenure and tossed out on my ass? _You_ may have a sizable nest egg to fall back on, but _I_ don’t. And don’t give me any of that switching schools nonsense. You know as well as I do that it isn’t really an option at this point. I realize I keep harping on this issue, but I have yet to hear a compelling case as to why being with you will make up for losing my job if we’re caught.”

“If it would make you feel better, I can certainly agree to support you in the unlikely event that happens,” Lupin replied, giving Severus a heated look. “As far as why being with me is worth the risk... well, that’s not so much a ‘tell’ as a ‘show’. Which I’ll gladly do whenever you’d like. I’m also an excellent cook, I keep a tidy house, I’ve studied massage even if I’ve not had any real chance to put it to use, I’m well read and cuddly, and I’d do my damnedest to make you so deliriously happy that you wouldn’t be able to imagine how you got along without me.” Then Lupin sobered. “But seriously... it’s a risk, and I know it. A gamble. All relationships are in their own way, some more than others, and this is no different. I suppose it comes down to whether or not you want to be looking back in twenty years as you grade yet another set of papers, facing another evening by yourself without anyone who’d be waiting impatiently for you, eager to share the details of your day, and wonder ‘whatever happened to that Lupin fellow, the one who pursued me so ardently? Is he sitting by a fire with a lover curled beside him, sharing cocoa and laughing over something inane on television, or is he as alone as I am?’”

Lupin’s words hit Severus as hard as any physical blow, and he was shocked into silence by their impact. He wanted to unleash a vitriolic denial, but he could see the image of himself that Lupin’s words conjured: alone with only his work for company. He had been career-oriented for so long that he hadn’t cared enough to cultivate a relationship, and he didn’t have men lined up at his door to begin with. His life had never been normal, and it had certainly never been easy; he had struggled to get an education, to pay his way through school, to write, to publish, to get tenure. Only now had he finally reached the point where he could stop struggling because he had accomplished his goals of having a secure job that would mean never living off Ramen noodles and wearing second-hand clothes again. 

He had an ideal life: a job that allowed him to take summers off and do nothing but read and research folklore - and get paid to do it. But who cared about any of it aside from him? There was no one to return home to and tell about some obscure folktale he’d unearthed or discuss his thoughts on the various recurring themes he’d noticed. He either wrote about it or kept his thoughts to himself, and he had to admit, that wasn’t nearly as interesting or enjoyable as the discussions he’d had with Lupin earlier in the semester. 

It _was_ a risk, and he stood to lose no matter what he chose. If he risked having a relationship with Lupin, he could lose his job, his security, and his financial independence, and his reputation would be ruined. If he refused Lupin and walked away, then he lost the chance of having a relationship with an intelligent, attractive man who shared his interests - and he had no doubt that Lupin would not be alone twenty years from now. Some other man would be smarter and less fearful than Severus and snatch him up.

He was successful and secure, but was he happy? No. Would being with Lupin make him as happy as Lupin claimed? That remained to be seen, but he supposed there was only one way to find out. 

“It’s difficult,” he said at last, releasing a long, slow breath and rubbing his forehead. “I feel like becoming involved with you is a mistake, but I also feel like _not_ becoming involved with you is a mistake. I don’t want to jeopardize my career, but neither do I want to end up old and alone, which I can see happening all too easily, given the path I’m currently on.” He gazed at Lupin, smiling mirthlessly. “I suppose the old saying about money not buying happiness applies here, but given how much money I’m risking, you’d better make me damned happy.” 

“I intend to try.” Lupin’s entire face lit up as he smiled at Severus, then he lifted a plate full of steak and shrimp and vegetables and handed it to him. “They say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Shall we see if that’s true in your case?”

“I suppose,” Severus replied as he took the plate and set it down in front of him, and then he waited for Lupin to take his place at the island as well. “It smells good, at least,” he conceded, only a little grudgingly. 

Lupin retrieved two bowls, filling them with rice from a steamer on the counter, then took the stool next to Severus. He reached for the wine bottle, refilling their glasses, then impulsively leaned over a brushed his lips against Severus’, a brief, playful caress. “I hope it tastes good, too. It’s so nice not to eat alone and to have someone to cook for. I want you to decide I’m invaluable and you have to keep me.”

Severus snorted and shook his head over that bit of nonsense, but he had to agree with Lupin on one point. “It does get tiresome cooking only for yourself,” he said. “I rely on take-out and things I can microwave more than I probably should.” 

“I used to, as well,” Lupin admitted. “Then when I semi-retired, I decided that I wasn’t about to continue in the same fashion. I took a cooking course and read a great deal and watched cooking shows, and now I think I manage well enough.” He laughed huskily. “I also started working out. I had to. Having a sedentary job had and eating snatched fast food meals whenever I thought to had left me in horrible shape. So I joined a gym and began on a treadmill, then advanced to swimming and lifting weights. I can honestly say I’m facing forty in better shape than when I turned thirty.”

“Well, that makes one of us,” Severus replied tartly. He had to force himself not to look to see the evidence of Lupin’s fitness regime for himself; the last thing he wanted was to be caught ogling. 

“You’re welcome to work out with me,” Lupin said, before taking a bite of shrimp and pointing to Severus’ plate. “Things like this aren’t so bad, really. I cook a lot of vegetables and meats without too much sauce or salt. Fresh food tastes better and is better for you. You’ll have to tell me what your favorites are. I’d love to make you a meal that’s all to your taste.”

“I’m not a picky eater.” Severus cut a piece of steak and sampled it, silently admitting that it was indeed quite good. “I like seafood in particular and most vegetables except squash. I refuse to eat squash, especially when it’s cooked to the point of being brown and smushy.”

“No squash, check,” Lupin nodded. “And I like seafood, too. Perhaps next time, I’ll make lobster for you.” He gave Severus a heated look from beneath his lashes. “Seafood is supposed to be good for the libido, as well. We could put that theory to the test.”

“Hmph!” Severus lifted his chin haughtily to keep himself from squirming under the heat of Lupin’s gaze. He was hardly a blushing virgin, but he’d never had anyone quite so persistent about getting him into bed before, either. “I don’t think _you_ need any help in that department. Your libido seems to be in overdrive as it is.” 

“I know! Imagine that,” Lupin replied, blinking innocently at him. “It seems to have started at the beginning of this semester for some reason. I find myself constantly aroused by the presence of a certain tall, slender, dark-haired intellectual. I even dream about him. Very... erotic dreams. It’s driving me to distraction. Whatever can I do about it?”

“Take a cold shower,” Severus replied quellingly. “If that doesn’t work, well, you’ve got two working hands.”

“Yes, I do.” Lupin’s lips curved in a wicked smile. “And I’ve made use of them, believe me. Along with my very fertile imagination. But I’m still dying to find out how the reality of you compares with my fantasies.”

Severus glanced away, not quite able to hide his embarrassment at that; no one had ever spoken so bluntly to him before, and he wasn’t quite certain what Lupin saw in him that somehow turned him into fantasy fodder. 

“I’ve only just agreed to give this... whatever-it-is a try,” he replied. “You’re going to have to wait a while longer to find out about the reality - which will probably be far less interesting and satisfying than your fantasies, so consider yourself forewarned. If you’re disappointed, you have no one to blame but yourself for building things up in your fevered imagination.” 

“I don’t believe I’ll be disappointed at all. On the contrary, I think that I’m going to be overwhelmed,” Lupin replied huskily. “Anyone can tell you have a great deal of passion, and I’m quite looking forward to seeing you setting it free as you are overcome with need.”

“Again, don’t get your hopes up,” Severus retorted, folding his arms across his chest. “Passion about old stories doesn’t translate into passion in bed, and believe me, I’ve never overwhelmed anyone before.”

“There’s always a first time, you know.” Lupin grinned at him, seeming undaunted by Severus’ quelling words. “But it’s not something you can be convinced of through words, so shall we table the discussion for the moment? I don’t want to make you think I only have a one track mind. I’d love for you to tell me how you got interested in folklore. Have you always liked it, or is it something you discovered after you went to college?”

Severus eyed Lupin suspiciously, half-expecting another innuendo or perhaps an attempt to grope him, but when none was forthcoming, he relaxed a little. “It began when I was young,” he said. “I grew up in Kill Devil Hills, which was such an odd name that I grew curious about it, and I looked it up. That led me to other books and stories about the area, and I kept branching out from there. Suffice to say, I have a large collection of folklore anthologies.”

“That’s great! So you turned a childhood interest into your life’s work.” Lupin’s voice and expression were filled with admiration. “So tell me, what _is_ the origin of Kill Devil Hills? It’s definitely one of the strangest place names I’ve ever heard.”

“Kill Devil Hills is part of the Outer Banks,” Severus replied, proud to show off his knowledge a bit. “Before any of the lighthouses were built, ships ran aground on the shoals or were wrecked in storms. If a ship wrecked close enough to shore, the locals raided as much from the cargo as possible, and in those days, many ships carried lots of rum, which, naturally, the looters were happy to make off with. People said the rum was strong enough to kill the devil, and thus the name was born.”

“Really?” Lupin’s eyes widened, and then he chuckled. “What a great story! The name is sinister, but not at all for the reason I originally thought. I figured it might be something more like The Devil’s Tramping Ground. North Carolina has a lot of very interesting stories, just like Charleston does.”

“No, nothing supernatural, just very human plundering and drunkenness.” Severus returned his attention to dinner, his appetite returning now that he was on more solid, familiar conversational ground. “But yes, the region does have a lot of interesting stories.” 

Lupin took a sip of his wine, and then he leaned back, stretching out his legs in front of him. “So what’s your very favorite story?” he asked. “Do you have one that you like more than all the others?”

Severus considered the question for a moment, trying to decide if he could pick one story over any other; it was difficult, but he did have a nostalgic attachment to one story in particular. “I like the story of the Gray Man of Hatteras,” he said at last. “Are you familiar with that one?”

“No, I’ve never heard it,” Lupin said, smiling at Severus in encouragement, seeming quite happy to listen to Severus’ tales. “Please tell it to me.”

“The tale varies,” Severus said, reaching for his glass of wine as he settled into storyteller mode. “In some versions, the Gray Man was a sailor. In others, he was a lighthouse keeper. But all versions agree that he drowned during a hurricane in the early 1900s. Ever since then, it’s said that his spirit appears near the Hatteras lighthouse before a major hurricane hits the coast, serving as an early warning system. Sightings continue to the present day, and some people have even claimed that he appeared right on the beach to warn them of impending danger.” 

“A helpful ghost?” Lupin asked, raising a brow. “That’s certainly much better than a scary one.” He seemed to consider for a moment. “It would make sense for him to have been a lighthouse keeper, wouldn’t it? Since it’s their job to give warnings. Maybe he carried his devotion to his duty beyond the grave.”

“That’s my personal preference,” Severus said, nodding. “Perhaps he feels he failed at his job or that the coast is still in too much danger during hurricane season for him to give up even in the afterlife.” 

“Such devotion is to be admired,” Lupin replied quietly. “And he’s left his mark, even if he’s nameless. Stories like that always make me wonder about the marks we leave on the world, the people we touch and help or those we hurt. Even if the stories aren’t even true, it says a lot about the human spirit and our need to feel as though we go on after death.”

“Yes, I suppose that explains all the ghost stories and tales of the supernatural that persist even when the legend itself has been debunked, like the Devil’s Tramping Grounds,” Severus mused. “We like to give ourselves the reassurance that something of ourselves remains and to explain things that still elude the logic of science.” 

“There are many things that escape logic,” Lupin agreed. “And I think it’s in our nature to want to explain the unexplainable and to find reason in all things. But sometimes... well, sometimes, I think, things happen that are just... magic. And accepting it when it happens can change your life.”

Severus glanced at Lupin, one eyebrow raised. “Somehow I don’t think you’re referring only to folklore.” 

“Perhaps not.” Lupin sipped his wine, looking at Severus over the rim of the glass as he did so. “But it’s true. The key is being able to tell real magic from mere parlor tricks, I think. Just as in research, where you have to strip away the bits that don’t matter to get to the heart of what’s important.”

“Hmph,” Severus said, unable to come up with a wittier response, but there wasn’t as much heat in the sound as before. It remained to be seen whether what Lupin offered was real magic or nothing but a parlor trick, but Severus was willing to do the research to find out - even if he wasn’t quite ready to strip.


	4. Chapter 4

Despite his continued misgivings, Severus still found himself saying yes when Lupin suggested having coffee after their respective classes or having dinner at a restaurant that Lupin was positive Severus would enjoy or watching a movie that Lupin insisted Severus had to see in order to make his life complete. Severus wasn’t oblivious enough not to recognize that Lupin was wooing him as unobtrusively as possible to avoid scaring him off, and eventually, Severus began to relax as they settled into a routine of dates-that-weren’t-called-dates and no one in the department seemed to raise any eyebrows. 

Severus had convinced Lupin not to drop his class, arguing that it was pointless to give up the last credit hours he needed to complete his coursework; doing so would only mean having to take another class in the fall and thus push back his dissertation schedule as well. Lupin had been inclined to protest until Severus pulled out the big guns, pointing out that the sooner Lupin had defended his dissertation and was officially no longer a student, the sooner the school’s policy about teacher-student fraternisation would no longer apply to them. If Lupin finished up his final credit hours this semester, he would be ABD at the end of the semester, and he could even start organizing his committee and working on his dissertation over the summer. 

Severus re-graded Lupin’s midterm and stopped being so hard on him during in-class discussions... although Severus didn’t go too easy on him, either, not wanting to call undue attention to their relationship. He dropped a few casual hints about Lupin assisting him with a research project on an informal basis into a few select ears, and he hoped that would be enough to ward off any speculation about the amount of time they might be seen together. 

The more time that passed without a summons to Dumbledore’s office or speculative looks in his direction, the more Severus began to relax, and the more he relaxed, the more he realized that he did indeed enjoy Lupin’s company. They were of an age, so they both shared certain cultural touchstones, and while their tastes in music and movies didn’t mesh perfectly, they overlapped enough that they could find plenty of common ground. Lupin was attractive, intelligent, and genuinely interested in Severus’ area of study, and he didn’t push too hard or try to move too quickly in their odd courtship. In short, he didn’t give Severus any viable reason to break up with him, despite Severus’ best efforts to find one. 

By the time Spring Break rolled around, Severus had decided they ought to go away for the long break together. Spending that much time in each other’s company without a respite would either drive them crazy and result in a break up or things would go so well that Severus might decide this wasn’t doomed to failure and go to bed with Lupin at last. Severus figured it could go either way, although he realized, much to his own annoyance, that his objections to the relationship were growing more and more pro forma at this point. 

As expected, Lupin had readily agreed to the proposed trip, and Severus had made all the arrangements, deciding to show Lupin some of the sites they had discussed in class. He chose Beaufort since it was a good central hub for the places where he wanted to take Lupin, and Beaufort was rich in history and folklore in and of itself. He booked a water-side room at the Beaufort Inn, which was within walking distance of several places Severus wanted to visit and had the advantage of a scenic view from the balcony. He dithered for several minutes before deciding to request a two room suite. On the one hand, he didn’t want to send the wrong message in booking a room with only one bed, but on the other, he wanted to make sure they had a king-sized bed handy... just in case. Besides, having a suite meant they could have some time and space to themselves, and Severus thought he would likely need it at some point.

He decided to take full advantage of their time off and suggested leaving on Friday afternoon and spending the full week at the beach, returning the Sunday before classes resumed. Lupin didn’t seem to have any qualms about the prospect of spending that much time in Severus’ company with no escape; he seemed eager, in fact, which helped assuage Severus’ apprehension. He tended to travel alone, so spending an entire week with someone else was going to be a new experience for him. 

On the drive to the coast, there were no squabbles over music, and Lupin wasn’t a backseat driver, which got the trip off to a good start. Severus had created an itinerary, and as soon as they unpacked and Lupin affirmed that he wasn’t too tired from the trip to get started, Severus began dragging Lupin all over the waterfront town. 

To his surprise, he found he enjoyed playing tour guide and showing off the places and telling the stories he knew so well to someone who was actually interested; he began with the Maritime Museum, where he proudly showed Lupin the display of artifacts from the _Queen Anne’s Revenge_ as if he’d dug them up himself. From there, he took Lupin to the Old Burying Ground, setting a leisurely pace as they wandered beneath the live oaks, pointing out various notable graves, such as that of Virginia Dill, who was buried in a glass-top coffin because in life she had been afraid of the dark, and that of the British officer who was buried standing up and facing England so he could salute his king for eternity. 

“And here we have the common grave of those who died on the _Crissie Wright_ ,” Severus said, pointing to a shield-shaped grave marker which denoted the common grave. “Unlike many stories that get handed down, this one is entirely true, which makes it all the more chilling.” He cocked one eyebrow at Lupin, waiting to see if his audience was interested a continuation of the story. 

“Oh?” Lupin looked closely at the marker, then turned to Severus and grinned with boyish and completely real enthusiasm, his blue eyes alight. “Then I have to hear it! Does it have to do with why they’re buried in a mass grave? That kind of thing was definitely frowned upon where I’m from; back in the old days it was considered ungodly.”

Severus tucked his hands into the pockets of his jacket, falling easily into storyteller mode. “The _Chrissie Wright_ set sail from Baltimore, headed to Savannah carrying five hundred tons of phosphate. The ship reached the Outer Banks during one of the worst winters on record, and the captain changed course toward Beaufort in hopes of avoiding the Diamond Shoals when a winter squall turned into a violent storm. Unfortunately, the winds reached gale levels and broke the main mast brace, and the captain was forced to beach the ship on January 8, 1886. For three days, the ship was beset by heavy wind, sleet, and snow, making it impossible for any of the crew to abandon ship or for anyone on shore to row out to them safely. Some of the crew were washed overboard. When the storm abated at last, residents of Diamond City were finally able to row out and search the ship. They found the remaining crew wrapped up in the main sail, and all but one had frozen to death. The dead were brought ashore and buried together here. Some accounts claim that the survivor was the ship’s cook while others say he was a cabin boy, but all accounts agree that he never fully recovered from his ordeal, and he died about a year later. To this day, the locals have a saying: ‘cold as the night the _Crissie Wright_ went ashore’.” 

Lupin’s eyes widened as Severus told the tale, and at the conclusion, he gave a slight shiver that wasn’t at all feigned. “Those poor people,” he said, glancing toward the marker again. “How awful it must have been, to be there within sight of land, seeing salvation just beyond your grasp as your life slips away. That’s definitely a chilling story - in more ways that one.” He stepped closer to Severus, slipping a casual arm around his waist, his expression playful. “At least we don’t have to worry about such a fate. I’ll definitely do what I can to help keep you warm.”

Instead of moving away, Severus leaned against Lupin a little, deciding he liked the way Lupin fit against him. “Somehow, I doubt that will be a problem,” he said, giving Lupin an arch look that bordered on playful.

A smile of pure delight lit Lupin’s face, and he gave Severus a little squeeze. “I do aim to please,” he drawled. “Speaking of warm, the wind is picking up. Would you like to get a cup of coffee to help warm us up for the rest of the tour?”

“That sounds good,” Severus replied, nodding. “There’s a place on the waterfront, if you don’t mind more walking.” 

“If we’re walking like this, I don’t mind if you want to go on for miles,” Lupin replied cheerfully. He turned them towards the way Severus had indicated, then set off at a sedate pace, his arm still firmly in place. “I’m glad you suggested coming here. It’s interesting, the scenery is great, and the company... well, I have to say I’m extremely pleased, for my part.”

Severus snorted and shook his head. “For _now_ you are,” he said, eying Lupin dubiously. “I keep wondering when the shininess will wear off and you’ll realize you’ve attached yourself to a single-minded, antisocial curmudgeon and run off.” 

“I’m already well acquainted with your single-mindedness,” Lupin said with a slight shrug. “I believe I’ve learned to cope with it rather well. As far as you being antisocial, I don’t mind that as long as you tolerate having me around at least part of the time. Otherwise, I need alone time myself, so I can understand when you do, too. The curmudgeon part doesn’t seem as prominent to me as it apparently does to you, so it isn’t a problem - and if it becomes one, we’ll simply have to discuss possible solutions.” He grinned. “You forget that I’m not some young, wide-eyed romantic who believes that a romance will be perfect simply because I want it to be. I’m an almost-middle aged romantic, who has seen enough of life and people to know that no relationship is perfect because no person is perfect. But I don’t demand perfection, anyway. I’m looking for something more mature and long lasting.”

“I can offer maturity,” Severus replied, glancing sidelong at Lupin. “But I’ve never had much luck with long-lasting before. Given the tenacity you’ve shown so far, though, this thing might prove to be long-lasting if only because you won’t go away.” 

He meant the words as part jest and part jibe, but deep down, there was a part of him that was starting to believe things might work out after all. 

“I do happen to believe in persistence,” Lupin said, his tone teasing. “Anything worth having is worth working for, right? I figure you’re just making me earn the right to your company, and that’s fine. If Southern belles feel entitled to make their beaus prove their ardor by refusing them multiple times in order to see how serious they are, why shouldn’t Southern gentlemen as well?”

Severus snorted at that, amused despite himself. “Well, get any thoughts you might be having of me in a corset and hoop skirt out of your head right now, Rhett, because it’s not going to happen.”

Lupin batted his long eyelashes at Severus, his expression coy, and when he spoke, it was in a deep baritone in obvious imitation of Clark Gable. “Now then, Severus, what makes you think I’d want that? As a matter of fact, I’d prefer to have you in nothing at all.”

Severus harumphed to cover his sudden and inexplicable bout of bashfulness at that. He’d never been shy about sexual humor or innuendo before - he enjoyed both Chaucer and Shakespeare, for God’s sake! - but he supposed it had something to do with the fact that he’d been thinking more and more along those lines himself lately. 

“Maybe you will,” he said, feeling a little too awkward to make eye contact as he spoke. 

Lupin’s arm tightened around him, and Lupin leaned closer, his lips brushing Severus’ ear. “I would count myself a very fortunate man if that were to happen,” he murmured quietly. “But rest assured I am willing to wait for as long as it takes for you to be totally comfortable with the idea.”

“It may not be that much longer,” Severus replied, deciding a little honesty wouldn’t hurt. “I suppose I simply needed time to convince myself that we could get away with it and that you’re serious about... whatever this is.”

“I’d like to think that what this is is a relationship,” Lupin said. He tilted his head at Severus inquiringly, his lips twitching slightly. “Or a romance, if you’d prefer, but somehow I thought the pragmatic term might be more to your liking. But whichever it is, you’ll hear no complaints from me if you’ve decided you’re almost ready to take the physical side of things more intimate. I will even admit to being eager to do so.”

“I think it’s fair to say that if we can get through this trip without killing each other, we have a shot at permanency,” Severus said dryly. “Therefore, taking things to the next level would be the next logical step.” 

There was no mistaking the gleam of heat in Lupin’s eyes, as well as the smile of satisfaction on his lips. “I’m all in favor of logic,” he said huskily. “And I’m all in favor of giving you exactly what you want. You’ll have to let me know the things you enjoy and the things you don’t. I’d hate to turn you off by hitting all the wrong buttons right off the bat.”

“I’m neither prudish nor particularly difficult to please,” Severus replied, lifting his chin haughtily. “But yes, I’ll tell you in no uncertain terms if you do something I don’t like.” 

“Sounds good to me,” Lupin replied cheerfully. He paused and looked around. “Which way to the coffee shop? Although I must admit that our conversation has warmed me up quite effectively.”

“This way.” Severus veered off to the right as they reached Front Street and discreetly moved out of Lupin’s grasp. “We’d better be a little more circumspect,” he explained, not wanting Lupin to see the gesture as a rejection. “This is a small Southern town, after all.” 

“True, true,” Lupin sighed dramatically, putting his hands in his pockets, although he kept close to Severus’ side. “I’m hoping that someday things will change, and we won’t have to worry about having things hurled at us in the streets, but until then, you’re right. Maybe someday we could take a trip somewhere like Miami or San Francisco, where it isn’t as much of an issue. I’d love to be able to walk in public with my arm around you.”

“I’ve always wanted to go to San Fransisco,” Severus mused, and then he snorted and shook his head at himself. Apparently he was indeed buying into the foolish notion that this relationship was going to last! 

“Then that settles it!” Lupin grinned, obviously pleased. He pointed to the coffee shop just ahead of them. “Aha, we’ve reached our destination, it seems. Hopefully you will at least let me pay for your drink? That shouldn’t raise any eyebrows.”

“That should be fine,” Severus replied, and as they reached the door, he opened it and held it for Lupin to precede him inside, where it was warm and the scent of rich coffee permeated the air. “Just try to restrain yourself from groping me either above or below the table, and we shouldn’t have any trouble.” 

“Darn,” Lupin replied, giving Severus such a rueful glance as he slid past him that Severus knew that groping was no doubt exactly what Lupin had been plotting. “Well, at least you’ll know that I _want_ to do it, right? That should count for something.”

“Why do you think I issued the warning?” Severus retorted as he swept toward the counter with an air of haughtiness worthy of royalty. “I want a hazelnut mocha. You order, and I’ll secure a table.” 

“Sir, yes sir!” Lupin replied, giving Severus a snappy salute before turning his attention to the girl behind the counter, placing their orders and paying for them. That done, he made his way toward Severus, giving him a secretive smile when no one else was looking.

Severus had claimed a booth near the back where there was a little more privacy, and while he waited for Lupin to join him, he pulled out the itinerary he’d typed up from his messenger bag and jotted down a few notes.

“It’s getting late, and it still gets dark fairly early,” he said once Lupin had returned. “I’m not sure how much you want to do before calling it a day. We have all week, and I don’t want to exhaust you on the first day.”

“I think I’d like to call it an early night, if that’s all right with you,” Lupin replied. “Not that I’m tired, but we do have that nice private balcony with rocking chairs. What do you say to ordering dinner from room service and enjoying the view?”

“That’s fine with me.” Severus nodded and made a little check next to the day on his calendar print out to mark it complete. “The view is quite nice, and we’ll be able to watch the sunset. We can get our coffee and walk back, if you like.” 

“Perfect!” Lupin nodded in agreement. “And we can discuss what you’d like to do tomorrow. I’m really enjoying this trip, Professor. You’re an excellent tour guide.”

Severus nodded, pleased to know he hadn’t bored Lupin already. He knew he could be rather intense and enthusiastic about his love of history and folklore, and few people shared that same enthusiasm, but it seemed Lupin didn’t mind. 

The barista called out their order, and Severus glanced at Lupin questioningly. “Shall we go?” 

“Yes, let’s,” Lupin replied, slipping from the booth and heading toward the counter. He collected their drinks, turning to hand Severus’ to him. “Ready when you are.”

Severus accepted the cup and headed for the door, waiting until they were outside to pick up the conversational thread again. “I’m a good tour guide for this area because I’ve been all over it numerous times,” he explained as they walked along. “I told you about the name of my hometown intriguing me at a young age, and that was the catalyst. Before I could drive, I learned from books. Once I got my license, I started visiting the places I’d read about. When I was older and could afford it, I spent breaks in various places all along the Outer Banks, getting to know people and hearing stories first hand. Eventually, I ventured further south and began to learn all I could about the Gullah culture, language, and folklore with an eye toward helping the on-going preservation efforts. Being single has left me free to roam and explore as I choose, but...” He glanced sidelong at Lupin. “I admit it’s rather nice having someone else along to share things with.” 

Lupin stepped closer so that his arm brushed against Severus’. “I like sharing them with you,” he said. “I find all of it very interesting, and I can see why it fascinates you so. I’m honored that you’ve allowed me to share your passions.”

“I don’t know that you need to feel _honored_ since all it entails is spending the rest of your days listening to me ramble on about old stories.” Severus blinked as the implications of his words struck him, and he floundered a bit. “Assuming this lasts, I mean,” he added hastily. 

“Oh, I think that’s a pretty safe assumption,” Lupin replied softly. “And it _is_ an honor, and don’t you forget it. I know you didn’t have to give me a chance and that you’re risking a great deal for me. I don’t want you to ever think I’m taking that for granted.”

“Well, there is that,” Severus conceded gruffly. “Although you won’t always be a student. One of these days, you’ll have your degree, and you’ll be my peer. We won’t have to worry about that damned policy any longer. I _might_ even call you Dr. Lupin if you ask nicely enough.”

Lupin flashed him a wicked smile. “I promise you that this particular doctor will most definitely make house calls,” he said, ogling Severus shamelessly. “But from what I can see, you’re looking really good. Really, _really_ good.”

Severus snorted and rolled his eyes. “Exactly how long _has_ it been since the last time you had sex?” he drawled sardonically. “I think deprivation has affected your eyesight.” 

“Several years,” Lupin admitted, then waved the notion away airily. “And that has nothing to do with it. I told you, I’ve had more than one offer in that time, but none of them interested me. _You_ \- “ His gaze traveled over Severus again, before he met Severus’ eyes with a smoldering look - “interest me. Fascinate me, even.”

The heat in Lupin’s eyes made a little shiver run down Severus’ spine, and he felt an answering heat kindle within him in response. He was swiftly beginning to wonder why he was holding out - and why he shouldn’t suggest forgetting room service and sunsets in favor of testing the bed as soon as they got back to their suite. 

“I still don’t entirely understand why,” he said past the dryness in his throat. “But I’m not inclined to argue or protest. Not anymore, at least. I’ll simply chalk it up to eccentric tastes and leave it at that,” he added in a lighter tone. 

“Good,” Lupin said. He drained the last of his coffee and smiled. “Shall we hurry back to the hotel? I find myself quite anxious to see what you wish to do instead of arguing or protesting.”

“You mean because it would be a nice change from the usual?” Severus asked dryly, raising one eyebrow as he twitted Lupin, but he quickened his pace nonetheless as he steered their steps back to the inn. 

“Oh, arguing and protesting have their own kind of attraction,” Lupin replied, lengthening his stride to match Severus’ long-legged gait. “As do struggling and resisting - assuming it’s all done in good faith, of course.”

Images of fleece-lined handcuffs and blindfolds rose up in Severus’ mind, and he pushed them aside; the last thing he needed was a visible erection as he walked down the street. 

“Well, you can’t say I haven’t made a good faith effort,” he said at last, trying to get his mind off the fun kind of struggle and resistance. 

“No, I definitely can’t.” Lupin’s voice was deep and husky. “But I think a change could be... invigorating, don’t you? I’d love to see the other uses to which you can put that sexy mouth.”

Severus could feel his face growing hot - and not from the exertion of walking. Fortunately, they arrived at the inn, sparing him the necessity of a response as they passed through the lobby where there were ears to hear their conversation. Once they were in the elevator, however, he turned to Lupin with was was, for him, a mild glare. 

“Just don’t expect me to stop the arguing part,” he said. “You’re very pushy and impertinent, and you need someone to take you down a peg or two once in a while.” 

He’d barely finished speaking when he saw a flash in Lupin’s eyes, and the next thing Severus knew, he was being pushed against the wall of the elevator, as Lupin pressed against him and captured his mouth in a hard, demanding kiss. He let out a muffle squawk, but it was a sound of startled surprise, not protest, and when he lifted his hands, it was to tug Lupin closer, not push him away. If he was honest with himself, this was what he wanted, and he was tired of fighting, and so he didn’t bother, yielding to the kiss instead. 

Lupin seemed to sense his capitulation, for his lips softened and became more beguiling, as he deepened the kiss, exploring Severus’ mouth slowly but with what seemed to be carefully leashed hunger. When the bell chimed, signalling that they’d reached their floor, Lupin pulled back reluctantly.

“Argue all you’d like, so long as you don’t mind what my response is likely to be,” Lupin murmured, then grabbed Severus’ hand and tugged him out of the elevator and down the hall.

Severus followed along willingly, his lips still tingling. “As long as you don’t think that will successfully shut me up.” He paused, and then he added, “Not for long, at least. I have a tenacious memory.” 

Lupin threw a grin at him over his shoulder. “Dear Lord, man, I don’t want to shut you up for more than a few minutes,” he replied. “It would deprive me of an excuse to do _that_ on a regular basis.”

Severus gaped at Lupin, momentarily speechless, but then he rallied. “Hmph! It’s a damned good thing you don’t, because it would be a Herculean task that would test even your persistence.” 

“Fortunately I have the superhuman persistence of a man obsessed,” Lupin replied. He stopped before their door and drew his key, unlocking it quickly then motioning for Severus to enter. “I’d ask ‘your place or mine’, but fortunately you had the foresight to make sure it was ‘our’ place, didn’t you?”

Severus gave another ‘hmph’ as he stepped inside, but a quieter one this time since he couldn’t deny the allegation. “I thought it would be more convenient to have a suite rather than separate rooms since we’re going to be here the whole week. We could cook, if we wanted to. There are fresh seafood markets everywhere. We can still have privacy if we need it, but...” He gestured vaguely toward the bedroom. “There’s also a king sized bed, and I thought...” He trailed off again and shrugged, not quite willing to come right out and admit he’d booked the room with seduction in mind.

“And you thought it would be perfect, which it is.” Lupin smiled as he followed Severus inside, then turned and hung out the “Do Not Disturb” sign before closing and locking the door with a decisive click. When he faced Severus again, he wasted no time pulling Severus into his arms, holding him close and not hesitating to let Severus feel exactly how aroused he was. “So, shall we try out that bed? As it happens, I brought a few things myself, just in case things were... ‘convenient’. So we don’t have to worry about making do.”

“Did you.” Severus raised one eyebrow at that, amused that Lupin had decided to come prepared as well. Perhaps he hadn’t done as well at ‘not sending the wrong message’ as he’d thought, but then again, he supposed it didn’t matter. “I suppose in the interest of full disclosure, I should take this opportunity to assure you that I’m disease-free,” he added, deciding to get that out of the way now rather than later when announcements of that sort might break the mood.

“I was a Boy Scout, so I believe in being prepared,” Lupin replied. He lifted a hand to caress Severus’ cheek, then smiled at him tenderly. “In the interest of full disclosure, I can happily assure you that I’m disease-free as well. So let me get something from my bag, and we can have a go at that bed, hmmm?”

“Go ahead. I’ll just...” Severus paused, realizing he didn’t know what he ought to do while he waited for Lupin to fetch sexual aides; he’d never quite been in this position before. “Wait in there,” he concluded lamely.

“Why don’t you just wait here?” Lupin replied, pointing to his suitcase which was next to the sleeper sofa. He gave Severus a look that was gently teasing. “Besides, I want to make sure that when you go in that bedroom, you don’t suddenly decide to lock the door - with me still on this side!”

Severus gave a derisive snort, but he didn’t move. “I see you do know me reasonably well after all,” he countered.

“Despite any evidence to the contrary - like my hardheaded persistence - I _can_ be taught,” Lupin replied. He opened his suitcase and withdrew a small zippered bag, then straighted and returned to Severus. “There, all set. And I’m not locked out, so score one for me!”

“Well done,” Severus replied dryly. He glanced at the bedroom, feeling a twinge of performance anxiety; he was out of practice at this, but he supposed it was rather like riding a bike. At least he hoped it was; Lupin was pinning a lot on him, and he hoped he could live up to the fantasies and expectations. “Shall we?”

“Let’s,” Lupin said, twining his fingers with Severus’ and pulling him toward the bedroom. “I can hardly wait to get you right where I want you.”

Severus let himself be led, eyeing the vast expanse of the king-sized bed as they entered the room. “Well, I suppose that’s big enough for both of us,” he said. 

“Both of us and the university football team,” Lupin replied teasingly. “But I’m not at all inclined to share.” He placed the zippered bag on the nightstand, then neatly turned down the bedspread before turning back to Severus. 

Stepping closer, he pulled Severus into his arms. “I can hardly believe this is happening at last,” he murmured as he leaned in and nuzzled Severus’ cheek with his nose. “You’ll have to let me know if I get... too enthusiastic. At the moment, it’s all I can do to keep from ripping your clothes off, tossing you on the bed and fucking you senseless.”

A gasp escaped Severus at the flare of heat Lupin’s words evoked, and he shivered in Lupin’s... Remus’ arms. Considering he was about to bare himself literally and figuratively, he didn’t think there was any point in maintaining the artificial distancing he’d done when thinking about Remus. 

“I’m not delicate,” he said huskily. “I don’t mind if things get a little rough.” 

Remus pulled back, his face flushed and his blue eyes dark. “Is that so?” he asked, his voice breathless and a bit ragged. “I think I can oblige you.”

With that, Remus took hold of the front of Severus’ jacket, pushing it back off his shoulders and stripping it down his arms in one smooth motion. Then he pulled Severus against his body with a little growl and captured his lips in a fierce, demanding kiss. Severus parted his lips and slid his arms around Remus’ waist, letting Remus take and plunder. 

Remus had kissed him passionately before, especially during their confrontation in Severus’ office, but this time, things were different. Remus’ forcefulness was fueled by desire rather than anger, and perhaps the knowledge that Severus wanted this, that they were about to become lovers at last which made Remus even more dominating and driven. He slid one hand behind Severus’ neck and buried the other in Severus’ hair, holding him in place as he seemed to do his absolute best to steal Severus’ breath away through the power of the kiss.

Severus relaxed and offered the surrender that Remus seemed to want; he had made the decision to let this happen, and it was time to put doubts aside. Instead, he focused on the warmth of Remus’ body against his and the delicious forcefulness Remus was displayed. Forcefulness that became even more pronounced as Remus released Severus’ mouth so that he could place his lips against Severus’ neck, lapping briefly at the skin there with a broad swipe of his tongue, before Severus felt the sharp nip of Remus’ teeth. Severus gasped, his toes curling, and he tilted his chin, offering better access to his throat.

Remus seemed more than happy to take what Severus offered, biting down on Severus’ skin enough that Severus knew there would be a mark later. Then Remus’ hands were pushing under Severus’ sweater as Remus kissed him again, slow and deep, his warm palms exploring the planes and angles of Severus’ back with slow, exploratory caresses. Severus arched against Remus’ hands, a soft hum escaping him; it had been far too long since he’d felt the pleasure of skin against skin, and his body was waking up a little more with each caress. He slipped his hands under Remus’ sweater in return, indulging in a little exploration of his own. 

With a soft moan against Severus’ mouth, Remus pressed back against Severus’ hands, seeming eager for more touches. Then he lifted his head, staring into Severus’ eyes with hungry desire.

“Too many clothes,” he muttered, as he grasped the hem of Severus’ sweater, tugging it upward and off until Severus was there before him, bare-chested. Remus stared and licked his lips. “Gorgeous.” His voice was full of a growling undertone, and he reached out, caressing the flat plane of Severus’ abdomen. “Even more so than I’d imagined.”

“Hmph!” Severus rolled his eyes, but at least Remus’ praise kept him from folding his arms across his chest to hide his scrawny form. “Either you have fairly low standards of beauty or you don’t get out much.” 

“Neither - so I’ll just have to prove to you how beautiful you are to me,” Remus replied. He pulled Severus close again, kissing his lips, the curve of his jaw, his neck, before moving lower, taking his time, seeming to savor every inch of Severus’ skin. His lips were warm, and he interspersed the kisses with brief, teasing flicks of his tongue, tasting his way down Severus’ body. Then he lapped at one of Severus’ nipples with his tongue, before capturing it in his teeth and tugging lightly, teasing its twin with his thumb at the same time.

Severus couldn’t help but gasp again and arch his back, arousal zinging through him with sharp intensity, and he tightened his fingers on Remus’ back, holding on for dear life as his knees threatened to buckle beneath him. 

Remus glanced up and chuckled softly against Severus’ skin. “Like that, do you?” he asked, then bit down on Severus’ nipple harder, growling low in his throat as he did so.

“Yes,” Severus replied breathlessly, pushing at Remus’ sweater and hoodie, wanting them off. “I like that too.” 

“That’s just the beginning,” Remus replied. He straightened and tugged off his hoodie before stripping his sweater off over his head. He stood before Severus and wrapped both arms around him, pulling him forward so that their bare skin touched, chest to chest, stomach to stomach, warm and firm. “I like this. A lot.”

Severus wound his arms around Remus and pressed closer, savoring the warm contact, his skin soaking it up like an eager sponge. “So do I,” he murmured, bending his head to nuzzle Remus’ ear. 

With a throaty chuckle, Remus tilted his head, caressing Severus’ back. “I like that even more,” he murmured. He scratched his nails down Severus’ back, lightly but giving an hint of possibilities. “You meant it when you said you didn’t mind it a little rough. That’s good, because I do, too.”

“I can tell,” Severus replied dryly, even as he shivered at the rake of Remus’ nails against his skin, and he wriggled pleasurably in Remus’ arms. “Yes, I meant it. You can’t frighten me off with a little biting and scratching.” 

“Good.” Remus bared his teeth in a grin that looked almost feral. He didn’t release Severus, but moved slightly, toeing off his sneakers. “Shall we try out that bed, then? That way I can do what I like with you, and you don’t have to worry about weak knees.”

“That might be a good idea.” Severus nodded as he toed off his shoes as well and took a few steps backward toward the bed, making sure Remus came with him. 

Remus was still grinning, and he wrapped his arms around Severus’ waist, flexing his knees slightly and lifting Severus up. “In you go, then,” he said, tipping Severus into the bed. Then he jumped in as well, moving to straddle Severus’ thighs, leaning over him and pinning him down by his shoulders. “My, my, professor... this is such an interesting position we find ourselves in.”

Severus went wide-eyed at Remus’ show of strength, more aroused than he could imagine by it, and he relaxed beneath Remus, trusting him enough to let him take control. “So it is,” he murmured, letting his gaze wander up and down Remus’ body as far as he could see, noticing the firm muscles that showed Remus exercised; Severus did not, and he wasn’t particularly interested in starting, but he would have to give it some thought if only so he wouldn’t look so scrawny in comparison. “What do you intend to do about it?”

“I intend to take full advantage of it,” Remus replied. “After all, I’m hot for teacher, so it would be a shame to waste such a perfect opportunity.” Lowering his head, he nibbled at Severus’ neck again, then started down his body once more. From this position, however, it was easier for him to take his time, exploring and tasting every bit of Severus’ skin, nipping at his collar bone, tracing each bump of rib with his tongue. He moved lower, nuzzling the flat expanse of Severus’ stomach, as his fingers moved to the fastenings of Severus’ jeans. “Oh, I think I’m going to unwrap my present now. I wonder how big it is?”

“Hmph!” Severus shook his head over Remus’ nonsense. “Big enough to get the job done, I promise you that.” 

“I don’t doubt that,” Remus replied, giving Severus a heated look from beneath his lashes. Slowly, slowly, he pulled down the zipper of Severus’ jeans, then pushed the denim down to expose the material of his boxers. Remus licked his lips, then pulled those away as well, baring Severus’ aching cock. “Oh, yes. Plenty big enough.” With that, Remus slowly took Severus into the wet heat of his mouth.

Severus sucked in a hissing breath and buried his fingers in Remus’ hair, fighting the urge to rock his hips. He’d forgotten how intense, how exquisite the pleasure was, and his need escalated as his body grew taut with arousal.

Remus began to hum deep in his throat, the sound one of encouragement. He moved his hands to Severus’ hips, not holding him in place but bracing himself as though giving Severus permission to do as he wished. Severus accepted the silent invitation and sought to relieve the aching tension, the humming serving to intensify _everything_ until Severus was hovering on the brink, moaning helplessly and then crying out, unable to hold out against the powerful release that overwhelmed him. 

Remus went still, swallowing with a contented sound, continuing to suck until he had every drop. Then he released Severus’ cock with a little kiss, crawling up until he could collapse beside Severus and pull him close. “Did that take the edge off?” he asked with a little smile as he stroked Severus’ hair. “I figured since it had been a while for both of us, it might be a little intense for prolonging things at first.”

“Mmm... good idea.” Severus’ voice came out as a sated purr as he wound his arms around Remus and shifted closer. He was _not_ nestling against Remus because he wasn’t the type to nestle, but he was relaxed and mellow, and so he would allow Remus to cuddle him. “It definitely took the edge off for me.” He regarded Remus quizzically. “Now what about you? I seem to recall certain promises that need to be fulfilled.”

“I always keep my promises,” Remus replied. He continued to stroke Severus, moving his hand along Severus’ back, pushing down under his jeans and boxers to caress the curve of his backside. “To do that, however, we both need to be wearing fewer clothes. After you’ve had a moment to recover, I’ll remedy that little issue and then induce a case of temporary amnesia that will leave you gasping for air.”

Severus pulled away just enough to wriggle out of the rest of his clothes himself and tossed the garments over the side of the bed, turning back to Remus with an imperious lift of his chin. “I don’t need a moment to recover,” he said loftily. 

Remus chuckled, and then he rolled over and unfastened his own jeans, bracing his feet on the bed so that he could lift his hips enough to push those and his briefs down and off. He disposed of them just as Severus had, and then he turned back and pulled Severus against his body, insinuating his leg between Severus’ thighs and pressing close. 

“This feels wonderful,” he murmured, practically wallowing against Severus wantonly. “I’ve been dreaming about this, about having you naked and willing in my arms. Reality is so much better than a dream.”

Severus hooked one leg around Remus’ hips and smoothed his palms up and down the length of Remus’ back, enjoying the feel of bare skin beneath his hands. “I’d hope so,” he said haughtily. “But if you want to make sure you aren’t dreaming...” With that, he pinched Remus’ backside hard.

With a yelp, Remus pushed Severus onto his back and then rolled over him, pinning him down to the mattress. The heat of desire gleamed in his eyes and was evident in the impressive erection pressing into Severus’ groin. “I know I’m not dreaming,” he growled, capturing Severus’ wrists, pushing them over Severus’ head and holding them there. “Now, about that promise...”

Lowering his head, Remus captured Severus’ lips, kissing him again, demanding that he yield, thrusting his tongue in and out of Severus’ mouth. At the same time, he began to rock against Severus slowly, seductively, the warm slide of skin and the friction foretelling exactly what Remus seemed to have in mind. Moaning, Severus tugged at his wrists, wanting to feel the security of being held down, and he yielded to the kiss and to Remus, rocking his hips to match Remus’ rhythm in hopes of spurring him on. 

Remus lifted his head, but only to put his lips next to Severus’ ear. “Now, now, not so fast,” he murmured seductively. “I have something else in mind.”

Releasing Severus’ wrists, Remus reached out to the bedside table and retrieved the kit. He opened it and took out a small bottle of lube and a condom, then returned the bag to the table. He smiled seductively at Severus. “Now then, professor... Am I right in assuming that me fucking you would be to your liking?”

Severus swallowed hard and nodded, keeping his hands resting over his head even though Remus had released them; he was already spent, but watching Remus made him feel rekindled heat. “Yes, it would be.”

“Then we are in perfect accord, since that is very much to my liking as well,” Remus replied. He moved downward, settling between Severus’ knees, and opened the bottle of lube. “I’ll go slow, since it’s been a long time for you. Maybe if I take my time, you’ll be ready for round two when I’m done.”

Remus coated his fingers with the lube, put the bottle aside and smiled wolfishly at Severus, an expression that was full of hunger and yet managed to convey a hint of tenderness as well. Then Severus felt a slight pressure at his opening as Remus began to circle slowly with one finger. “Relax,” he said softly. “I’m going to make certain this doesn’t hurt at all.”

Severus wasn’t sure when he had begun trusting Remus; somehow it slipped up on him when he wasn’t paying attention. He realized, though, that the thought that Remus might hurt him, even inadvertently, hadn’t crossed his mind; he knew without being told that Remus would try to make it good for him too, because that was simply how Remus was. He couldn’t _say_ all that, of course, because it would be ridiculously maudlin, and so he reached out and stroked Remus’ leg, letting his knees fall open wider in a silent display of trust. 

“You look so gorgeous,” Remus said, his voice husky as his eyes roamed over Severus’ body. As Severus relaxed, he slowly slipped one finger inside, while he caressed Severus’ stomach with his free hand. “I love how long and lean you are, like a cat, all boneless grace. You drive me crazy with wanting you, my sexy professor.”

The muscles in Severus’ stomach quivered in response to Remus’ touch, and Severus felt the urge to arch into the caress like the cat Remus compared him to. He’d never been treated like this before, and he realized that Remus was making him feel... special. It was new and a little overwhelming, but he liked it. 

“You can have whatever you want,” he replied, his voice soft and deep.

“You. All I want is you - and to make you feel fantastic,” Remus replied. He continued to prepare Severus slowly and carefully. Remus’ skin was flushed and damp, his eyes dilated with the obvious strength of his own arousal, but he didn’t rush. After a time, he eased a second finger into Severus. “Is that all right? Do I need to go slower?”

“If you go any slower, I’ll die of old age before we consummate this relationship,” Severus retorted, shooting a mock-glare at Remus. “I’m fine. Just get on with it!”

With a throaty chuckle, Remus crooked his fingers and stroked. “Like that?” he asked.

Severus gasped as arousal zinged through him anew, and he felt his skin growing flushed, prickling with heat. “Yes! Just like that.” 

“As you wish,” Remus replied. He scissored his fingers, stretching Severus, interspersing the movements with teasing strokes to seemingly keep driving Severus crazy. “When you’re ready, I’m going to fuck you and fill you and pound into you until you don’t remember your own name.”

“I’m ready!” Severus insisted, rocking his hips up against Remus’ hand. “ _Now_!” 

Remus didn’t hesitate any longer. He carefully withdrew his fingers, and reached for the condom he’d placed beside them. His hands shook slightly as he opened it and put it on, and then he used more lube to coat himself. Finally he rose to his knees and put his hands on Severus’ hips, lifting him up. “All mine,” he said, his voice ragged, as he slid into Severus’ body with one slow, deep thrust.

Severus groaned, his toes curling as Remus’ thick cock stretched and filled him; it had been so long, and he’d forgotten how good it felt - or maybe it felt so good because it was Remus, and this was different, offering him a sense of completeness and satisfaction he’d never experienced before. 

“Yours,” he murmured, wrapping his arms around Remus’ shoulders and holding on tight. 

Remus gave a growl and began to move slowly, pulling back and thrusting forward again, filling Severus anew. “So hot, so tight,” Remus murmured. He repeated the motion again and again, picking up the tempo just slightly. “So perfect... Severus, you’re perfect.”

Then Remus curled his fingers around Severus’ cock and stroked it firmly. “I want you to come for me. I want you to come while I’m inside you and driving you mad with need.”

Hissing with renewed pleasure, Severus began to move, matching Remus’ rhythm and trying to send him deeper; he could feel arousal building within him again, heightened by Remus’ words and touch, and he gave himself over to it, hiding nothing. 

“Yes, yes, just like that!” Remus was panting, and he quickened the pace, his eyes riveted on Severus’ face with the intensity of total absorption. He stroked Severus in counterpoint, seeming to do his absolute best to keep his promise to drive Severus completely out of his mind with pleasure.

Severus met Remus’ gaze, amazed by the tender intensity he saw there - all for him. It gave him all the motivation he needed to drop his own masks for once, and he allowed himself the freedom to let go - and go wild beneath Remus, arching, writhing, and gasping raggedly as tension built and crested and broke at last, and he shattered, Remus’ name tumbling from his lips. 

Remus went still, watching avidly, stroking Severus through the pulses of his release. He brushed his lips against Severus’ and captured them again in a deep, drugging kiss, as though he could taste Severus’ pleasure and wanted to share it in every possible way.

Then Remus drew back, fierce satisfaction in his eyes. “Perfect,” he said again as he began to move once more, slow and deep. “And now it’s my turn. I want to lose myself in you.”

“Then do it,” Severus replied, panting for breath. He locked his legs around Remus’ hips and rocked up, wanting to feel Remus deep within. “Whatever you want, do it. I want you to.” 

“Yes!” Remus gasped as Severus’ legs tightened, and then he sped up his pace, slamming into Severus hard and fast, driving him down into the mattress as he let go of his control. He began to chant Severus’ name like a litany, and then with one last deep, powerful thrust, he buried himself deep, throwing his head back and shattering with a ragged cry.

Severus watched avidly and moved with Remus throughout, yielding willingly to Remus’ claim, and he felt a thrill of triumph at the knowledge that _he_ had given Remus such pleasure. He relaxed against the mattress, smug and sated, and he smirked up at Remus, feeling quite pleased with himself. 

Remus drew in a deep, shuddering breath and looked down at Severus, grinning even as he panted. “Someone looks quite pleased with himself,” he murmured as he collapsed down beside Severus on the mattress. “And rightfully so, I might add. Wow.”

“It was rather nice,” Severus said casually, draping one arm across Remus’ in an unconsciously possessive gesture. “I might be persuaded to do it again.” 

“I’d like that. A lot,” Remus replied, his eyes gleaming with satisfaction and amusement. Then he groaned slightly, pressing a brief, hard kiss to Severus’ lips before rolling to the edge of the bed. “I’ll be right back. Let me just clean up and get a wash cloth.”

“All right.” Severus watched with blatant admiration as Remus headed into the bathroom, enjoying the view before indulging in a luxurious stretch, feeling pleasantly sore. He plumped up his pillows and settled in with a sigh of satisfaction as he waited for Remus to return. He didn’t have to wait long, as Remus reentered the room, his gaze immediately going to the lines of Severus’ body, running over him with a gleam of hunger. 

“What a pleasant sight to return to,” he said, sitting down on the mattress beside Severus and then proceeding to clean him up with the warm cloth. He gazed at Severus, giving him a wide-eyed look of appeal. “So... are you averse to sharing the bed with me for the night? Or do you need a bit of distance? After we have dinner, of course - whenever you decide you’re hungry again.”

“Well, it _is_ a rather big bed,” Severus said slowly, pretending to consider the matter. “It might get a bit cold in the night, and I’m not accustomed to sleeping in such a big bed. It might help to have someone taking up space.”

“Oh, definitely,” Remus replied somberly, nodding in agreement. He finished with the clean up and tossed the washcloth onto the bedside table before stretching out beside Severus and pulling Severus into his arms. “Mmmm... this feels good.”

Severus rolled into Remus’ arms without hesitation and pressed close, savoring the warmth of Remus’ firm body against him. “Not bad,” he murmured, nuzzling Remus’ neck as he settled in comfortably. “I could get used to it.” 

“It would make me happy if you did,” Remus said, chuckling and stroking his hands over Severus’ back. “Very happy.”

“Then I’ll certainly consider it,” Severus replied even as he leaned in to the caresses. He still had reservations, and they still had a full week of togetherness ahead of them that could lead to disaster, but he was starting to think getting used to having Remus around would make him very happy, too.


	5. Chapter 5

As it happened, the week of togetherness didn’t lead to disaster. It didn’t even lead to grated nerves and escalating irritation. Perhaps being in a state of perpetual satiation helped mellow him out, but Severus found Remus to be an agreeable companion, one who figured out when to give him some space, who found his stories interesting, and who seemed to find his company agreeable as well. 

Severus found he liked being woken up with slow, sleepy morning sex, opening his eyes to see Remus above him and to feel Remus’ weight atop him as Remus nudged his legs apart and slid into him slowly; he still wanted a cup of coffee before he had to articulate anything more complex than “yes”, “now”, and “more”, but it was an adept way of dealing with his morning grumps. After breakfast, they left the inn to visit whatever site Severus had on his itinerary for the day, and by the end of the week, Severus had managed to cover a fair bit of territory, including Bath, the Dram Tree, the allegedly haunted _USS North Carolina_ , and the Maco Light. He’d thrown in a few historical sites for good measure, but for this day, their last day, he had changed his plans. 

Today, he was taking Remus to visit his home. He didn’t tell Remus that, of course; instead, he mentioned Kitty Hawk and the Wright Brothers Memorial, and they’d spent the first half of the day there. Kill Devil Hills was only a stone’s throw away, however, and Severus said nothing as he drove into the tiny town. In a matter of minutes, he pulled into the driveway of a small house, one that was in obvious need of more regular care.

“This is my hometown,” Severus said simply, glancing at Remus as he unfastened his seat belt. “And this is my house. Since we’ve been looking at relics of the past all week, I thought you might find more personal relics interesting as well.” 

He saw Remus’ eyes widen. “I would, yes,” Remus replied, mirroring Severus’ action and opening the door of the car. Remus stood, closing the door and walking to the front of the car, gazing at the house intently. When Severus joined him, he turned his head and smiled at him. “Thank you.”

Severus shrugged diffidently as if it wasn’t any big deal, although it was because he’d never brought anyone home before; even though his parents were deceased and there was no one to interrogate Remus, he was bringing Remus to a place that was more personal and intimate than his condo, since this place held his past. 

“I stay here in the summer sometimes,” he said as he headed up the narrow concrete walkway, which was lined with monkey grass. There was a rocking chair on the porch, its white paint chipped and faded, and the woven seat was coming unraveled, and the siding on the house needed a good cleaning. “As you can see, it sits empty the rest of the year. I’ve thought about renting it, but...” He shrugged again. “I want to use it myself during prime tourist season, and it probably wouldn’t be worth the effort to try renting it during the off-season.”

He opened the screen door, which creaked loudly, and unlocked the front door, pushing it open and gesturing for Remus to precede him inside. 

“That makes sense,” Remus agreed. He paused briefly as he stepped past Severus, raising a hand and caressing his cheek lightly. “Besides, I know I wouldn’t like the thought of strangers in my house at any time. It’s too... weird.” 

“Weird is a good way to put it,” Severus replied dryly as he followed Remus into the house and shut the door behind them to keep out the chilly March air. 

He looked around at the familiar surroundings - worn furniture that hadn’t been updated since the Eighties and walls that needed painting - and felt himself relax a little. It was dingy and in need of more care than he provided, but it was his, and it was home, more so than anywhere else he’d lived. 

“Anyway, this is it. My old stomping grounds,” he said, gesturing to the small living room. “Nothing much has changed.” 

Remus looked around, taking everything in, not hesitating to examine pictures and knick-knacks with genuine curiosity. Then he came over to Severus and slid an arm around his waist. “I can see that it would make a nice place to get away to when you want to escape the university,” he said quietly. “And there isn’t much need to change things if you don’t want to. If you’re comfortable with it, that’s all that matters.”

Severus had grown accustomed to Remus’ casual gestures of affection, and since they were alone, he saw nothing wrong with wrapping his arm around Remus in return. “I need to do a little maintenance,” he said, “but for the most part, I’m content to leave it as it is. I like my memories as they are.” 

“Nothing wrong with that.” Remus smiled and turned so that he could embrace Severus more fully. “Thanks for feeling comfortable enough to share this with me. It means a lot.” He leaned forward and kissed Severus, firmly and warmly, before pulling back. “So, are you going to show me the rest? I’m interested to see where young Severus plotted and schemed.”

Severus snorted, but he clasped Remus’ hand and led him down the hall to the back of the house. “There’s not much else, but if you want to see my former center of operations, it’s back here.” 

When they reached his old bedroom, he stepped inside and tugged Remus along with him. The room itself was small, and the bedspread and curtains were a nondescript blue, but the shelves were still crammed full of all the books he had treasured in his youth; he had taken some he still wanted to re-read and possibly use to his office, but most were here, where they belonged. Poverty had prevented him from collecting a great deal of ‘stuff’, as most young people did, but there were a few scattered knick-knacks, mostly mementos of the places he’d gone in search of more stories and legends, and on his desk next to an old Smith Corona typewriter was a battered photoalbum, containing his inexpertly shot photos documenting his adventures. 

Remus glanced around, peering at the books on the shelves with a grin. “I see we had similar tastes, even back then,” he replied, running one finger reverently along several of the spines. Then he moved on to the desk, and looked at Severus before gesturing to the photo album. “Do you mind if I look?”

“No, go ahead.” Severus moved to stand beside Remus and flipped the book open himself. “It’s mostly pictures of the places I went when I began exploring on my own, but there are quite a few of the people who shared their stories with me. I made sure to document names and dates - an academic even then,” he said dryly. “There may be one or two of me as well.” 

Remus grinned at that, pulling out his reading glasses and perching them on the end of his nose before picking up the album. “Let’s see... ah, yes, you really were quite the documenter, even as a teenager. Oh, I recognize that - the Devil’s Stomping Ground,” he said, pointing to a picture near the beginning. “And some of the places we went today.” He flipped the page, smiling at the places he recognized. Then he paused over a picture where the image of a young Severus looked back at the photographer. “I wish I’d met you back then.” Remus’ voice was a little wistful. “It would have saved us both a lot of waiting, wouldn’t it?”

Severus glanced at him, surprised by that observation, and he felt a pang of wistfulness himself when he realized he agreed. He further surprised himself by saying, “Yes, I suppose it would have.” 

“Well, we found each other at last, and that’s all that matters,” Remus said, his normal, open grin returning. He finished flipping through the photos, and then he closed the book and placed it reverently upon the desk. “You know, you have material for a book on how to become a folklorist sitting right in front of you. I think that would be so cool, for you to write about what it’s like to gather the stories and bring them to other people.”

“So I should write that one after I write the children’s book?” Severus raised one eyebrow, amused. “You seem quite eager to steer me in the direction of a new career.” 

“No, not really - especially since you enjoy teaching,” Remus replied, wrinkling his nose at Severus. “I suppose it’s because I’m still stuck in the mindset of a writer myself, even if I was just doing technical stuff.” He chuckled. “Maybe I should be the one to do the writing, and you edit.”

“You have plenty of writing of your own ahead of you,” Severus reminded him. “You’d better get through that first before volunteering to become my unpaid slave labor.” 

“Oh, I suspect you can offer me payment that’s far, far more to my liking than mere money.” Remus gave him a look of pure, molten desire. “After all, money I have. It’s _you_ I want.”

“It seems you’ve had me as often as you liked over the past week,” Severus replied archly, feeling an answering flare of desire in response to the look in Remus’ eyes. Even though it had only been a week, he could tell his body was growing attuned to Remus’, not to mention quite greedy, seemingly unable to get enough of Remus’ touch. “I see no reason why that shouldn’t continue.”

“Well, then, that’s all the recompense required for me to be your slave for... as long as you want me,” Remus said. He walked his fingers up Severus’ torso and brushed them lightly over Severus’ lips. “I can do everything you desire - bring you breakfast in bed, rub your feet after a long day, warm your bed... go to my knees for you whenever and wherever you wish.”

Severus knew he could give a light response to that and perhaps even steer Remus toward a quick tumble on his old bed. Or he could give an honest response, which was more than a little difficult and even unnerving for him, but after the past week, even he couldn’t deny that they were a good match, and that this relationship had a strong chance to be long-lasting. That in itself was overwhelming if he thought about it too much, but he refused to be ruled by fear and what-ifs any longer. He liked Remus, and he liked what they had together, and he didn’t want to give it up. He also suspected his feelings were moving well past ‘like’, but he could only handle so many self-truths at one time. 

Thus instead of tossing out a coy invitation, he cupped Remus’ cheek in his palm and gazed steadily at him. “I think I will want you for quite a long time,” he said quietly. 

“Good.” Remus’ voice was deep and husky, and he wrapped his arms around Severus, pulling him in close and tight. “Because I have no desire to be anywhere else other than with you, no matter where that happens to be. And you know how annoyingly persistent I can be about getting what I want.”

“Yes, I do,” Severus drawled sardonically even as he slid his arms around Remus and pressed close in return. “Believe me, I will never forget.” 

“Well, then, let’s seal the bargain,” Remus said. He moved slightly, releasing Severus but not moving away. Instead he slid the white gold ring from the thumb of his left hand, and then he took Severus’ hand and placed it on his thumb. He raised Severus’ hand to his lips, kissing it lingeringly. “Now you’ll have something to remind you that I won’t forget, either.”

Severus stared down at the ring, shocked by the gesture, but surprise quickly faded to warm affection as he realized it was more than a gift; it was a symbol. They couldn’t be open about their relationship yet, but wearing this ring would indeed serve as a reminder of commitment. 

“I accept,” he said huskily, meaning more than just the ring, but also the myriad other things he couldn’t express, and he hoped that Remus would understand.

“Then once again, we are in agreement.” With that Remus pulled Severus close once again, capturing his lips in a deep kiss.


	6. Chapter 6

March rolled into April, and Severus began to breathe more easily when he and Remus were on campus together. They only had a matter of weeks before the semester was over, and he hoped they could be a little less circumspect once Remus was ABD. At the least, he intended to ask Dumbledore about it, bringing it up as a hypothetical situation; he didn’t like the idea of having to hide their relationship until Remus had finished his dissertation, but he would do it, if necessary. In the meantime, he let go of his paranoia a little, because as much as he didn’t want to be caught, he didn’t want to have a stress-induced ulcer by the end of the semester either. 

Remus, of course, continued to invent excuses to stop by his office, only this time, he didn’t mind, and the visits were far from awkward these days. He even extended his office hours, using the excuse of using the peace and quiet of his office to get more grading done than at home, so that his schedule would fit better with Remus’. 

On a warm day in early April, Remus stopped by his office, knocking on the door frame before stepping inside. “Still hard at work, professor?” he asked, raising a brow at the papers in front of Severus. “I just finished grading all of mine, and I was hoping to drag you out for a little celebration. It’s warm enough today to even have coffee sitting outside. Wouldn’t that be a delightful change?”

Severus glanced up and smiled slightly, which was about as effusive as he ever got. “Congratulations,” he said, capping his red pen and tossing it onto the desk. “As it happens, I could use a break.” 

“Excellent!” Remus beamed at him. “Come on, then, so that we can beat the mad scramble when classes let out. I don’t want to end up behind every freshman who wants a vente mocha frappuccino with extra shots to help them get through the rest of the semester.”

Pushing back his chair, Severus rose to his feet and skirted around the desk. “Good point,” he said. “The little monsters can be quite vicious if you get between them and their caffeine. Then again, so can I.” 

“Ah, but then I have ways to tame the savage Snape,” Remus said, his eyes warm as he watched Severus come toward him. He dropped his tone to a low, seductive growl. “I suspect I can get your heart racing without having to resort to chemical augmentation.”

Severus smirked as he drew nearer to Remus, already feeling a little tug; the growl never failed to make his toes curl, especially since he knew Remus had the strength to back it up. He feigned a stretch, putting all the long, lean lines Remus claimed to love on display. 

“You do seem to have a knack for it,” he purred. 

“And you do the same for me,” Remus replied, stepping closer, his eyes darkening with rising desire as he watched Severus’ little show, which was obviously having exactly the effect Severus desired. “At this point, I’d love to just forget about the damned coffee and take you right here, bending you over your desk and sending those papers flying everywhere.”

Severus licked his lips and stared at Remus with dark eyes growing wide and gleaming with banked desire, his breath catching at the vivid imagery Remus’ words evoked. “Actually, I’d like that, too... but only if you clean up the papers and get them in the right order again later,” he said, his voice sounding breathless.

“Would you, now?” Remus asked. He moved close enough to Severus so that the heat of their bodies overlapped, but he didn’t touch him, not yet. “I wouldn’t mind cleaning up afterward, professor. Not if it means I get to bury myself in your glorious body and hear you whimpering and moaning for me.”

Severus’ breathing grew ragged, and he stepped back, not to get away from Remus but to lean suggestively against his desk. “I... ah... did happen to bring certain... supplies to my office,” he said. “Just in case they were ever needed.” 

“My, my... I think I’ll have to make you an honorary boy scout,” Remus replied, smiling with wicked amusement. He moved closer, his thighs pressing against Severus’, and ran his finger over Severus’ lower lip. “You deserve a reward for being so prepared. Name it, and it’s yours.”

Severus darted his tongue out to lap at Remus’ finger, and he rocked his hips just enough to let Remus feel how aroused he was already growing. “I want you to bend me over this desk and fuck me right now,” he whispered huskily. 

“As you wish,” Remus replied, grinning ferally at Severus. Remus pulled him up straight and spun him around and pressed between his shoulder blades, forcing Severus down over the desk. Remus rocked against him, his cock nudging against Severus’ ass through the layers of their clothes, giving him a taste of things to come. “Like this?”

“Yes!” Severus sprawled across the desk, more than willing to comply with whatever Remus wanted to do - until a thought occurred to him, and he glanced over his shoulder, alarmed when he saw his office door was standing wide open. “Shit! Close the door before someone walks by and sees us.” 

“Oh!” Severus could see Remus visibly shaking the fog of lust from his brain, and then he stepped back and quickly complied. “Sorry, I didn’t even notice,” he said ruefully before returning to Severus, wrapping his arms around him from behind. “Now... where were we?”

Severus’ sigh of relief turned into a moan as Remus pressed against him again, and he waved his hand toward the other side of the desk. “We were just about to get _supplies_ from the bottom right drawer so you could get on with fucking me the desk...”

* * *

When Dumbledore requested a meeting with him, Severus didn’t think anything about it at first. He assumed Dumbledore wanted to make another attempt to convince him to serve on this committee or that prior to the end of year elections. That, or perhaps Dumbledore wanted to discuss his annual report; no doubt his grade distribution had shown a particularly high number of Ds and Fs in one of his Fall semester composition courses, due to some of his students having the attention span of a gnat and an inability to pay attention or follow instructions, whether written or verbal. 

But when he arrived in Dumbledore’s office and Dumbledore greeted him with a somber look and a quiet, “Please close the door, Severus,” he felt the bottom drop out of his stomach. 

“You wanted to see me?” he asked, trying to sound more casual than he felt as he took a seat across from Dumbledore.

“I did.” Dumbledore folded his hands on the desk and peered at Severus over the top of his half-glasses. “There have been some rather serious allegations made against you, and we need to discuss them.” 

Severus went cold, a litany of _shitshitshit_ running through his head as he struggled to retain his composure. He thought they’d been careful and discreet... 

“What kind of allegations?” 

“That you are sexually involved with one of your students,” Dumbledore said gravely. “Is this true?” 

“Who told you that?” Severus demanded, hoping perhaps the best defense would be a good offense in this case. “I have a right to know what was said about me and who said it!”

Dumbledore hesitated, but then he inclined his head slightly. “You were seen in a... compromising position in your office with Remus Lupin,” he said. “Professor Black and one of our graduate students, Mr. Potter, both witnessed the incident.” 

“I should have known!” Severus snarled, clenching his fist and striking it against the chair arm. “Black has been trying to undermine me for years, and Potter is his little hero-worshipping sycophant.”

“Be that as it may, they both claim they saw you in a clearly sexual situation with Mr. Lupin. They described you as being bent over your desk while Mr. Lupin held you down,” Dumbledore said, a sharp edge creeping into his voice. “Their motives don’t matter. What matters is whether they are telling the truth or not.”

Severus hesitated, his mind whirling as he tried to find a way to deny the allegations, but he couldn’t possibly deny that he and Remus had been doing exactly what it looked like they had been doing. If he told Dumbledore the truth about their relationship and how it had started, it would make Remus look bad, and he would get a reputation for being a troublemaker before his career even got started. Black would do his damnedest to make Remus look as bad as possible if only because he’d willingly consorted with Severus, and Black’s poison could spread quite far indeed, perhaps even hurting Remus’ chances of being hired. Black would also do his best to make Remus’ life hell while Remus remained in the department to finish his dissertation. 

Severus, on the other hand, already had tenure and a certain amount of prestige in his field. Even with a scandal attached to his name, there were some departments that would be willing to hire someone whose name was attached to notable, groundbreaking research in the field. He could survive this. Remus might not. 

“They are,” he said flatly. “I approached Mr. Lupin earlier this semester and coerced him into a liaison.” 

Dumbledore sat back in his chair, his bushy white eyebrows climbing as he regarded Severus with increasing dubiousness. “Severus, I’ve known you for years. I know your attitude toward your students and toward adhering to rules. I find it difficult to believe you would forget your own code of conduct and ignore the university’s policies for a fling.” 

“Mr. Lupin is the victim here,” Severus insisted, unconsciously twisting the ring on his thumb as he spoke. “He may deny it because I threatened to fail him if he didn’t give in, but no matter what he says, the truth is that this is entirely my responsibility. I started it, and I continued it.” 

Dumbledore’s gaze flicked briefly to the ring and back up to Severus’ face, and his expression softened, becoming more sympathetic. “I see,” he said softly. “Then I will make certain Mr. Lupin experiences no repercussions from this unfortunate incident.”

Severus nodded and breathed out slowly, satisfied that Dumbledore would keep his word. “Thank you.” 

“But there remains the problem of what to do about you,” Dumbledore continued, growing stern again. “Naturally, I am reluctant to enforce the full measure of the policy on a valuable faculty member who has exhibited exemplary conduct prior to this occasion, and there are extenuating circumstances in that Mr. Lupin is a non-traditional student who is almost ABD, making him closer to a peer.” He sighed and regarded Severus in silence for a long moment, and then he shook his head. “I cannot fire you over this, Severus. However, I must do _something_ , or Professor Black may go over my head and approach someone less... understanding.”

Severus nodded tersely. He didn’t care what happened to him; all he cared about was making certain that Remus’ career in academia wasn’t sabotaged by politics before it even got started. 

“You are on probation for three years,” Dumbledore said at last. “Your course load will be reduced to a two-two, and you must have at least one article published or a book in the process of being published in that time, or your tenure may be revoked. You will also be expected to begin annual service work within the department.” He fixed Severus with a somber look. “And, of course, you will cease all contact with Mr. Lupin. If you are found to have made contact with him in any form, your tenure will be revoked, and you will be released from service to this university immediately. Is that clear?” 

Something within Severus froze and shriveled, and he suspected it was his heart. Outwardly, however, he nodded.

“I understand,” he said, his voice low and tight.” 

“Good.” Dumbledore glanced at his watch and nodded. “Mr. Lupin should be here by now. I’ll ask Susan to send him in.” 

Severus clamped his hands on his knees and straightened his back, avoiding looking at the door as Dumbledore picked up the phone and spoke with his assistant in the outer office. He had no idea how he would get through this, knowing he was giving up the best thing that had ever happened to him. But the sacrifice was worth it if it kept Remus out of the lines of fire. Washington DC had nothing on academia when it came to playing politics, and on such a competitive playing field, the combatants were often vicious, Black being a prime example. Sirius Black had been gunning for Severus for years, and no doubt, he would have a field day once Severus’ disgrace was known. And it _would_ be known, if only because Black wouldn’t keep his damned mouth shut if he could spread his gossip and bring Severus down in the process. 

Then Dumbledore’s office door opened, and Severus went still, scarcely able to breathe as he tried to steel himself for what was to come.

Remus stepped into the office, and Severus could almost imagine his habitual smile fading at Dumbledore’s expression.

“You wanted to see me, sir?” he asked, a tension in his voice that wasn’t usual for him. Severus felt Remus’ hand on the back of his chair, as Remus stood beside him, perhaps sensing that whatever was to come had to do with him and Severus as a pair.

“Yes, Mr. Lupin.” Dumbledore nodded as he turned a somber gaze on Remus. “As I just told Dr. Snape, allegations about an improper relationship between the two of you were brought to my attention. Dr. Snape has confirmed that the allegations are true, and that he is responsible for initiating and continuing the relationship in violation of the university’s policy.” 

Severus heard Remus’ indrawn breath, a sound that was part surprise and part outrage. “With all due respect, Dr. Dumbledore, Dr. Snape is a liar.” Remus moved his hand to rest on Severus’ shoulder. “First, I initiated the relationship, and we both continued it. And I want to protest the university’s policy; Dr. Snape and I are both mature adults, so the situation the policy was meant to guard against - that of a professor with a much younger, inexperienced student - does not apply in this case. While I am technically a student, I’m hardly young or inexperienced, and, quite frankly, the policy in this case doesn’t meant shit.”

“Mr. Lupin-” Dumbledore began to speak, but Severus cut him off with an abrupt wave. 

“What did I tell you, Dr. Dumbledore?” he said, forcing the words out, and he somehow managed to summon an irate glare for Remus. “You don’t have to dissemble anymore, Mr. Lupin. Your grade isn’t at risk anymore, and you have nothing more to gain by trying to cover for me. It was a valiant effort, however. I’ll give you that.” 

“I think perhaps the less said, the better, Mr. Lupin,” Dumbledore said firmly. “Dr. Snape has confessed, and in so doing, he has guaranteed there will be no academic or political repercussions for you or your future career because of this. Considering the on-going feud between him and Dr. Black, that is no mean feat.”

Remus stared at Severus and then at Dumbledore, and he tightened his hand on Severus’ shoulder, his fingers gripping hard enough to leave marks. “So that’s it?” he asked, his tone harsh. “I walk away unscathed... and what happens to Severus? He gets disgraced? Punished?”

“Dr. Snape will be on probation, and he will be expected to perform research and service duties that have waived until now,” Dumbledore replied matter-of-factly. “In three years, his tenure will be reviewed. If he has met the requirements I have established, he’ll be fine.” 

“That’s it?” There was an note of suspicion in Remus’ voice. “You’ll review it fairly if he meets your requirements, and not hold one indiscretion over him for the rest of his career?”

“I will, yes,” Dumbledore replied, although Severus knew damned well that what Dumbledore wasn’t saying was that Severus would be vilified by a certain faction of the department, and news of his indiscretion would spread like wildfire around the department and beyond. Academia was quite a small world, unfortunately. 

Remus relaxed his death grip on Severus’ shoulder. “Well, perhaps that won’t be too awful,” he said, drawing in a deep breath. “We can get through this.”

“There is no ‘we’,” Severus said gruffly, gripping his knees so tightly that his knuckles turned white. “The other part of this is that I am to have no further contact with you. If I do, I will be fired immediately.”

Remus moved then, stepping in front of Severus and catching his eye. “What, until the end of the semester?” he asked, then looked back over his shoulder at Dumbledore. “I’ll drop the class and take a fail. I don’t care. That way, I won’t be his student any longer.”

“But you will still be a student,” Dumbledore pointed out. “Dr. Snape is banned from having any further contact with you as long as you are a student.”

“And even at the end of the semester when I’m ABD, I’m still technically a student, and I assume, _Doctor_ Dumbledore, you will be very, very technical about this?” Remus’ tone held suppressed fury, and then he turned and looked at Severus with wide eyes, his face suddenly going pale as death. “You agreed to this? You agreed not to see me ever again? You didn’t fight it at all?”

“How could I?” Severus replied, unable to meet Remus’ gaze. “You’ve told me how much you want a teaching career repeatedly ever since we met. If you are seen anything but my unwilling victim, you’ll be cannon fodder for everyone who has a vendetta against me, and you’ll be labeled a troublemaker, which will make getting a job infinitely harder. Competition for the few jobs out there is bad enough without having your reputation precede you. If you want a fair chance in this field, this is the only option.”

Remus reached out, brushing the ring on Severus’ finger briefly, before stepping back. “I thought you understood me better than that,” he said, his tone flat and lifeless. “I thought what we shared was more important than mundane considerations, but apparently you don’t agree. Fine, then. If this is what you want, Severus, have it your way.” He turned and looked at Dumbledore. “If you’ll excuse me, I have things to do.”

“By all means.” Dumbledore nodded. 

Without another word, Remus turned and left the office, closing the door behind him with a soft but very final sounding click.

Dumbledore gave Severus a sympathetic smile. “For what it’s worth, I am sorry it came to this.” 

“Not as sorry as I am,” Severus replied, and with that, he too rose and left the office without looking back.


	7. Chapter 7

The rest of the semester was torturous. Severus went through the motions of teaching and keeping up with grading, but he felt more alone than he ever had before in his entire life, and he couldn’t shake the empty longing for Remus to talk to, for Remus to hold him and touch him and make him feel desirable and confident, for _Remus_. 

On top of that, he’d become more or less a pariah in the department; once Black and Potter began spreading the word of what had happened - covertly, of course, because officially, it was supposed to be kept confidential - Severus’ enemies had rejoiced, and those who had been on the fence about him appeared to have fallen off on Black’s side. He was snubbed and whispered about and looked at him as if he was a criminal. Those few in the faculty who were still kindly disposed toward him reluctantly admitted, when he asked, that the rumors were rather bad, making it sound as if he was a sexual predator who had subjugated and molested Remus. It would have been laughable if he hadn’t been so broken inside. 

The only thing that made the ordeal worthwhile was that his sources also assured him that Remus was coming out of this unscathed, the innocent victim who deserved sympathy for having to endure sex with greasy ol’ Snape. Remus would be able to finish his dissertation without the internal politics of the department impeding his progress or his career, and for that, Severus was grateful.

His sympathizers questioned him, but he told them nothing; the only person he confessed the truth to was his best friend, Regulus, who was not a completely fair and unbiased audience, considering how much he disliked his brother. Regulus’ rivalry with Sirius was almost as intense as Severus’ rivalry with him, lessened only by the fact that they taught at two different schools on opposite sides of the state. 

“Let me tell Mother about this,” Regulus insisted, fury evident in his voice when Severus called to tell him what had happened. “She’ll take care of him.”

“ _No_ ,” Severus replied emphatically, knowing full well which son the matriarch of the Black family favored - and it was not her eldest. The woman was a force to be reckoned with, and she would unleash the full power of her influence in a heartbeat if Regulus asked it of her. “The whole point of this was to make sure all blame falls on my head. If you get your mother involved, he might get suspicious, and I don’t want any chance of backlash against Remus.” 

Regulus agreed, albeit reluctantly. “I just don’t like seeing him get away with trying to ruin you - and over nothing! You and Remus are consenting adults, and it’s obvious how you feel about him.” 

“Your brother has been gunning for me for years out of nothing more than spite and jealousy because nothing he’s written has been as influential as my book, and he hates the fact I got away without doing more research and service once I got tenure,” Severus said, shrugging to himself. “It’s my own fault for handing him the ammunition he needed, but I’ll be damned if I let him drag Remus down, too.” 

“Well, if you need to get away for a while, you can always stay with us,” Regulus said, his voice softening with sympathy. “We’ve got plenty of room.” 

Initially, Severus offered polite thanks for the invitation but had no intention of accepting it, but then the semester finally ended, and he found himself facing the entire expanse of summer with nowhere to go. He didn’t want to go home to Kill Devil Hills, because he’d taken Remus to his house, and they’d ended up shagging on his old bed _and_ the couch before they left. He couldn’t bear to think about visiting his usual haunts either, because he’d taken Remus to see all of them, and memories of their Spring Break trip were still fresh - and painful. 

He wouldn’t even have summer school to break the monotony; Dumbledore had refused his request to teach summer school on the grounds that he needed the time to get started on either the articles or the book he was expected to produce within the next three years. In the end, he packed his bags and headed west to the mountains. Rather than impose on Regulus and his wife all summer, however, Severus stayed with them only a week and used the time to find a small, inexpensive apartment in Asheville to rent through the middle of August, determined not to return to the east coast until he absolutely had to. 

Rather than use his time to write, however, Severus spent the long summer months exploring the area and collecting stories. He’d never been to the mountains before, and the scenery and culture were different enough to help him put aside lingering memories for a while. Remus was always on his mind, nonetheless. He couldn’t count the number of times he wished Remus was with him to share the places he was seeing and the stories he was hearing; Regulus wasn’t a folklorist, and while he would listen to Severus natter on, it was without Remus’ avid interest. 

Asheville being something of a bohemian utopia, Severus found himself in a more gay-friendly environment, which was a pleasant change for the better. He was even asked out a couple of times, but he refused, saying he was taken. And he was. It didn’t matter that he couldn’t see or talk to Remus; he still belonged to Remus and Remus alone. He couldn’t even bear to think about being with someone else, not even when he lay sleepless in bed, his body aching for Remus’ touch, and bringing himself off did nothing to offer true relief. The ring Remus had given him never left his finger, and he wasn’t interested in letting go and moving on. He’d found his perfect match, and if he couldn’t be with Remus, then he would go back to being alone rather than settle for second best. 

In August, Severus had to start thinking about returning to work, which he dreaded. He loathed the thought of returning to that toxic environment; he wasn’t looking forward to telling Dumbledore that he hadn’t written a single word all summer, either. He hadn’t been able to work up the motivation; the only ideas he had were ones that Remus had given him, and he couldn’t face that, not yet. He also chafed under the new restrictions, resentful that he was being forced into doing research and service work that would take his time and attention away from the classroom. 

“You should move here and work in my department,” Regulus said as he helped Severus pack and prepare for his return to the coast. 

“If a position for a folklorist opens up, let me know,” he replied, and he wasn’t entirely joking. 

As expected, Dumbledore wasn’t pleased, and he threatened to put Severus on a semester’s worth of leave time, which would mean he wouldn’t teach at all, although he would still be paid since leave time was supposed to be used for research, writing, and publication that would ultimately benefit the university. Severus would have to show Dumbledore a partial draft of _something_ by the end of the semester, or he would be put on leave in the spring. It was one more nail in the coffin, and as the number of committee meetings he had to attend went up, his mood spiraled further downward. 

By the end of September, he was mired in depression, scarcely able to summon enough energy to teach his two classes when all he really wanted to do was hole up somewhere away from the venomous looks, the gossip, and the looming deadlines. He wanted to escape, but he didn’t know where to go; news of his scandal had likely spread well beyond the university at this point, if Black had anything to do with it, and he was afraid to search for new positions on the chance that whoever was hiring had heard about him and wouldn’t even consider his application. He felt increasingly alone and trapped, and he saw no way out of the empty darkness. 

A faint glimmer of hope appeared when Regulus emailed him to let him know that Regulus’ department had two positions to fill and searches were underway; one of them was for a folklorist. Regulus assured him that the chair of the department, Dr. Minerva McGonagall, didn’t have a preconceived negative opinion of Severus and would not dismiss his application out of hand, should he submit one. 

Still, he didn’t leap to begin the application process. If he applied and was accepted, it would mean a major change, and he’d never been good with those. He would have to uproot his life and move to the other end of the state, away from the familiar places he’d been within short driving distance of his entire life. And yet, he mused, what was he really giving up? Visiting those places only brought him painful memories now, and he damned well didn’t have anything keeping him at the university. 

The school where Regulus worked was a smaller, private liberal arts college that didn’t have as well-developed a graduate program as the university, but that didn’t bother Severus. From what Regulus had said over the years, Severus thought he would fit in well since the school placed an emphasis on preserving history, culture, and traditions from all over the state from the Native American tribes to the Outer Banks. Severus thought he might be able to convince them to expand to include Gullah history, culture, and traditions as well; he would certainly try, at least. 

The department was smaller, and Regulus had only ever had good things to say about the chair, which boded well. Severus had enjoyed the artistic atmosphere of Asheville, which was far more tolerant of alternate lifestyles than other parts of the state, and he thought he could be content there. In the end, he wasn’t sure why he had hesitated, given he had no reason to stay and every reason to leave, and so he began the application process. 

He wasn’t entirely surprised when McGonagall called to tell him that he had made the short list.

“But I thought we might have a little chat, if you have the time,” she added casually, which Severus knew meant he was about to take the next step in the process: an interview. “If not, I can call again some other time.”

“I’m free,” he said, leaning back in his chair and awaiting the first question. 

She ran through the expected gamut of questions regarding his background, his experience, and so on. It was all very professional, and Severus thought he might get through it without the specter of scandal rearing its head, until there was a prolonged pause on McGonagall’s end, and when she spoke again, she sounded hesitant. 

“Dr. Snape, I dislike having to bring this up, but I’ve heard things...” 

“I can imagine what you’ve heard,” he replied dryly. “I assure you, Dr. McGonagall, I don’t habitually get involved with my students.” 

“Then what happened?”

He hesitated, but then he shrugged and decided to tell her the truth. “I became involved with a doctoral candidate who took my class in order to fill out the remaining credit hours to finish his course work. He’s currently ABD. He’s also only a few months younger than I am, and what happened between us was mutually consensual. However, I took the blame because I didn’t want him to suffer any political backlash for being associated with me. For that reason, I’d appreciate it if you didn’t enlighten anyone else,” he added. “If you want confirmation that I’m telling the truth, however, you may ask Regulus. We’ve been friends since college, and he knew what was going on all along.” 

“Regulus speaks highly of you,” she replied. “He’s also quite devoted to this department, and I doubt he would recommend anyone he thought would cause problems here in any way.” 

“All I want is a peaceful place to teach and pursue my studies of regional folklore,” Severus said with unusual candor. “I will publish again, and I can most certainly bring in grant money to your department when I do, but after what I’ve been through this semester, I’d rather cut my own throat than sit on any committee ever again.” 

McGonagall chuckled at that. “Some people aren’t cut out for that kind of service,” she said diplomatically. “But we can find ways to put your individual skills to use, I’m sure. There are all manner of events that highlight folk arts in the area year-round, and you could even develop your own.” 

“That sounds infinitely more interesting,” he agreed, making her chuckle again. 

With that conversational hurdle overcome, Severus was able to relax again, and the conversation ended with her asking when he was available to visit the campus. Being invited to visit meant he’d done well in the interview, which pleased him; it also meant having a meet-and-greet with the rest of the faculty and giving a presentation of some kind. Reading an excerpt from his book would be acceptable if he didn’t have any new material, she assured him. 

The visit was scheduled for early February, and Severus began making plans. He informed Dumbledore that he would be happy to take a research leave in the spring, although privately, he had no intention working on an article for publication. Instead, he spent his time preparing a presentation for his on-campus visit, using the stories Remus had given him as a foundation. It was painful at first, given the memories associated with them, but he pushed the ache aside and focused on his goal. By the end of January, he was ready, and he went westward, feeling fairly confident of his chances. He did his best to be pleasant and social, and he let Regulus show him around to familiarize him with the campus. His presentation was greeted with favorable comments afterward, and the questions posed by other members of the faculty led to an engaging discussion that let Severus show both his knowledge and his passion for the subject, his reserve fading as he grew more animated and comfortable. 

It helped that Regulus seemed to be well-liked by his colleagues, who seemed to adopt an ‘any friend of his...’ attitude toward Severus, and Severus rather liked McGonagall in particular, a starchy woman with a refreshing no-nonsense attitude. He felt as if he would be entering a completely different climate, and while he knew a certain amount of social networking and politics were unavoidable, he hoped to avoid the polarization he’d experienced in having an outright enemy within his own department as he had with Sirius Black. It helped, too, that he would be the only folklore specialist, thus eliminating the sort of petty jealousy and competition that had fueled their feud. 

He had to wait a few agonizing weeks while they interviewed other candidates and discussed the options, but in the end, he was offered the position, and he accepted with alacrity. He put his condo in town and his house in Kill Devil Hills up for sale immediately and began preparing to move west. Doubtless, he would come back to visit the area, because it was too deep in his blood for him to stay away forever, but he could let go of his home and his past more easily now. 

By the end of March, he couldn’t bear to remain in the area any longer, beleaguered by memories of the year before, and so he went to Asheville to start house-hunting as a means of distracting himself. Regulus volunteered to tag along and help, since he was off all week for Spring Break. 

“Have you thought about contacting Remus?” Regulus asked casually one day as they sipped coffee after lunch in one of the downtown cafes. 

Severus almost choked on his coffee, and he set the cup down and fixed Regulus with an incredulous look. “I can’t, and you know it.” 

“Why not?” Regulus gazed at him, one eyebrow raised. “You’re going to quit at the end of the semester anyway. You’ve got nothing to lose and everything to gain.” 

“What about Remus?” Severus pointed out. “He’s still working on his dissertation. If anyone finds out we’re together...” 

“They won’t if you ask Remus to join you here,” Regulus said, and Severus frowned and shook his head, about to protest, but Regulus kept going. “Look, it’s simple. We always need an adjunct or two, and I already know of someone who’s taking a tenure-track job next year, so that’s at least one guaranteed open spot. Get Remus to apply. If he gets the position, then he’ll come here to teach freshman composition and maybe a lit class or two while he finishes his dissertation. Even if someone finds out that you two are back together, so what? Remus won’t be in the thick of the politics there; he’ll be here, where they can’t get at him. As long as he’s chosen his committee carefully, politics won’t get in the way of his defense. Once he’s got his degree, there are several schools within reasonable commuting distance from Asheville he can apply to. Keep in mind, though, that we do have a partner hire policy that doesn’t apply just to heterosexual couples. Between you and me, McGonagall thinks hiring you is quite a coup, and I’m sure she’d be willing to secure a tenure-track position for Remus to keep you happy. Granted, he’ll have to go through the process like everyone else to get tenure, but if he’s decent, that shouldn’t be a problem.” 

Severus opened his mouth and shut it again with a snap. It couldn’t possibly be that easy... could it? Then he thought about Remus’ parting words in Dumbledore’s office and cringed. 

“That would work, except for the fact that he probably loathes me now,” he said, gazing down into the depths of his cup. “Worse, he probably holds me in disdain for being weak and cowardly.” 

“What?” Regulus stared at him, visibly shocked. “Why the hell would he think that? What you did took strength, and it was incredibly brave. Stupidly self-sacrificing, yes, but brave nonetheless,” he added, and Severus shot him a glare. 

“He thinks I don’t really understand him and that I care about ‘mundane considerations’ more than about him,” Severus said, sitting back and folding his arms across his chest. 

“Well, then it’s up to you to explain and convince him to give you another chance,” Regulus replied, finishing his coffee and fixing Severus with a stern look. “What have you got to lose by trying? You’re lonely and miserable, and you’re never going to be happy without him. The worst thing that can happen is you can go to him and get on your hands and knees for some good old-fashioned groveling, and he’ll tell you to fuck off. You’ll still be lonely and miserable, but at least you’ll know for sure that you really don’t have a second chance with him. On the other hand, he might have spent this past year lonely and miserable too. So miserable that if you beg prettily enough, he’ll be willing to give you another chance, and then you won’t spend the rest of your life as a mopey bastard who sits alone in his house every day and night and wonders ‘what if’.” 

Severus _wanted_ to argue, but as much as he wanted to, he couldn’t. He _was_ lonely and miserable and likely to remain so as long as he didn’t have Remus. He knew he could be content in his new job and new environment, but happy? No, not when he remembered the completeness he’d felt when he had shared his life with Remus and now felt nothing but a jagged edge where Remus’ life used to fit so perfectly next to his.

“I hate it when you’re right,” he said at last, glaring at Regulus, who had the good sense not to look smug. 

“I don’t want you to live with unnecessary regrets, that’s all,” Regulus said, offering an encouraging smile. 

And deep down, Severus didn’t want to live with them either.


	8. Chapter 8

Severus stood outside Remus’ front door and stared at the doorbell, trying to work up the nerve to ring it. With Regulus’ encouragement, he’d decided not to wait until the end of the semester to approach Remus; as little as he looked forward to this, it was better to get it over with so he’d know one way or another rather than waiting for several weeks more, giving him too much time to wonder and perhaps talk himself out of it altogether. 

He’d debated about whether to call or email Remus first, but he decided the element of surprise might work in his favor; if he let Remus know he was coming, Remus might have too much time to think about it and decide not to see Severus at all. No, it was better to catch Remus off-balance and take his chances than to give Remus time to prepare his defenses. 

To further help his cause, Severus had dressed in black jeans and a black sweater that he knew Remus particularly liked. Remus seemed to like it when Severus wore all black, claiming it made Severus look “long, lean, and sexy”. He only hoped Remus hadn’t changed his opinion on that, although certainly Severus was indeed still lean. Leaner, even, in the past year since depression had made his appetite dwindle. He’d lost weight he could scarcely spare - and _that_ made him fret that Remus would find him unattractive now. 

But there was no time to do anything about it now. He was here, and he was no coward. Drawing in a deep breath, he reached out and rang the doorbell. 

After a few moments, he heard approaching footsteps, and then the door opened. Remus stood there, staring at Severus, obviously caught completely unaware by Severus unexpected appearance.

Remus had obviously lost weight, and his hair was much longer; in fact, it looked as though he’d not bothered to get it cut since the last time Severus had seen him. There was a growth of stubble on his jaw, and he was dressed in faded t-shirt and jeans that Severus recognized, although they were no longer lovingly tight on Remus’ hips as they had once been.

Blue eyes wide behind his glasses, Remus drew in a breath, obviously gathering his wits. “Severus.” His voice sounded almost rusty, and he cleared his throat, then straightened as his face became closed and shuttered. “What are you doing here? If anyone sees you, you’ll lose your job.”

“I don’t care,” Severus said, wanting nothing more than to fling his arms around Remus and feel Remus’ arms around him again in return, but he knew he didn’t have that right. Not yet. He only hoped he could earn it back. “I’m quitting at the end of the semester anyway. I couldn’t wait any longer to talk to you. May I come in?” 

For a moment, he thought Remus was going to refuse, to step back into the house and slam the door right in Severus’ face. He could practically see the thought crossing Remus’ mind as Remus went rigid, and a flash of pain and anger surfaced in his eyes before his mask fell back into place.

“I don’t know what you could possibly have to say to me; I believe you made yourself quite clear a year ago,” Remus replied, but then he shrugged as if he didn’t give a damn. “But suit yourself.” He turned and headed back into the house, leaving Severus to see himself in and close the door.

Severus closed the door as quietly as possible and locked it, and then he followed Remus into the living room, back into surroundings that were painfully familiar. He wasn’t quite comfortable or daring enough to take a seat, and so he remained standing instead, watching Remus cautiously. 

“I don’t think I did make myself clear,” he said, tucking his hands into his pockets. “Maybe you were right about me not understanding you well enough, but you were wrong when you said I gave you up over something mundane. I don’t consider your dreams mundane.” 

Remus leaned against the doorway that separated the living room from the kitchen, crossing his arms over his chest and shrugging. “I don’t think that raking words over the ashes is going to get us anywhere, and frankly it’s a little late to do a post-mortem. A year too late.” His lips twisted. “Why are you here? If you’re quitting, I assume you’re probably leaving the area and going somewhere else to teach. Did you want the stuff you left here? I have it all...” he hesitated for a second, then lowered his gaze. “It’s in a box. I’ll go and get it.”

“I didn’t come to get my things,” Severus said, shaking his head vehemently. “I came because I wanted to talk to you. I wanted...” _to get you_. He straightened his spine, girding himself for the huge risk he was about to take. “I wanted to know if I have any hope of getting a second chance.”

Remus frowned. “Why would you want that?” he asked. “A year ago, all that seemed to matter was doing everything you could never to see me again. Putting my stupid degree above everything, even above how... how I felt about you.” Remus straightened with an angry shrug of his shoulders. “I’ve wondered often if it was just a convenient excuse to end our relationship. Especially since I’d made it clear I’d spit in their damned eyes for you. That I had enough money, and that you... _you_ , Severus Snape, were more important to me than _anything_ else. Yeah, you left me to live my fucking dream, but what you refused to acknowledge was that the dream meant _nothing_ to me without you!”

“It wasn’t a convenient excuse,” Severus replied, able to muster some firmness for his voice and stance. 

The worst part was over; he’d taken the risk of making contact, and Remus had let him inside. That had to mean something - perhaps that Remus wanted to talk to him on some level - or else he would have had the door slammed in his face. Now he was on slightly surer ground, and while he knew he could still ruin everything with the wrong word, he felt like he had a chance, however slight, to make things right. Unfortunately, that meant being brutally honest to the point of baring himself in ways he wasn’t accustomed to or comfortable with, but he couldn’t hide anything now, or it might cost him dearly. 

“The truth is, I didn’t really believe I was that important to you. That _I_ could be that important to anyone,” he admitted quietly, swallowing hard as he forced the difficult words out. “I wanted you to have the dream job you wanted, and I was willing to make sacrifices to make sure you got it. I didn’t realize how much it would cost until it was too late, but even if I’d known, I doubt I would have decided differently because I was afraid I wouldn’t be enough, and you would end up resenting me for putting you in the middle of a war zone and costing you the new career you’d been working toward.”

Remus’ eyes flashed. “I told you that you didn’t really understand me,” he said, his voice bitter. “Despite the fact that I tried to show you and tell you in every way I could that wouldn’t send you running for the hills. Yes, teaching was my dream, but I told you what I really wanted was someone to share my life with. _You_ to share my life with! As it is, I’m going through the damned motions, getting the Ph.D because I don’t know what else to do with myself. But I can’t teach. I can barely stand to look at that damned campus.” He gave a short bark of laughter that held no trace of humor. “You would have been more than enough, Severus. If you could believe that the petty world of academia with its back-biting and hypocrisy could ever mean more to me than going to sleep next to you at night and waking up next to you in the morning, then you never knew me at all.”

“It wasn’t your fault,” Severus said, his voice low and tight as he struggled with the impact of Remus’ words. “It had nothing to do with you and everything to do with my own insecurities, I know that. But the bottom line is, I didn’t take the blame because I wanted out. I did it because I cared enough that I wanted you to be happy, even if it meant without me, even if it meant sabotaging my entire career for your sake.” He shook his head, bitter frustration welling up within him, and he raked his fingers through his hair angrily. “And it was all for nothing! All I wanted was to protect you, and look! It didn’t mean a damned thing, after all. It was just another failure.” 

Remus moved so fast that Severus barely knew what was happening, but he found himself grasped by his upper arms, and Remus gave him a sharp shake. “You are _not_ a failure,” he said harshly. “And I didn’t know why you did what you did. God, Severus! How could you think I could ever be happy without you? I’ve been miserable! I’ve felt like I’ve had my heart ripped out of my chest, and the university is haunted for me. Haunted by your ghost and the ghost of everything we shared.” Suddenly Remus flung both arms around him, holding him crushingly tight. “I’ve missed you. God, how I’ve missed you.”

Stunned by the abrupt switch from shaking to squeezing, Severus couldn’t react at first, but when it finally sank in, he wound his arms around Remus and held on tight. He could scarcely believe that after a year of loneliness, he was holding Remus again at last, and he could do little more than cling. His throat closed up, and his voice was barely audible as he whispered, “I’ve missed you too.” 

After a moment, Remus drew back, not releasing Severus but looking into his eyes. Remus’ own eyes were red-rimmed and suspiciously bright, and he wasn’t smiling. “I want to give you a second chance, Severus. I do. I’ve dreamed of nothing else for an entire year. But I swear to God, if you go running off again because you think you’re protecting me, I will hunt you down and shake you until you see reason!”

“I don’t want to go through it again either,” Severus said, shaking his head. “It was a miserable year.” 

Suddenly Remus was kissing him, claiming his lips with familiar passion, and Remus’ arms were so tight around him he could barely breathe. Startled anew, Severus took a moment to respond, but once surprise wore off, he parted his lips with a heartfelt moan, grateful to be experiencing once more what he thought he’d lost forever.

Remus explored his mouth with eager hunger tempered with what seemed to be wonder, as though he could barely believe that Severus was really there. He pushed his hands under Severus’ sweater and let them roam warmly over Severus’ back, exploring every inch as if to reacquaint himself with Severus’ feel and taste. Severus arched against Remus’ hands, eager to feel more; after months of longing and loneliness, he wasn’t certain he could get enough, his hunger and need eclipsing what he’d felt during their first time together even after years of celibacy. Then, he hadn’t known what he was missing; this time, he was acutely aware of what he’d done without for so long.

Kiss flowed into kiss, and then Remus lifted his head, staring at Severus with eyes gone dark with need. “I want you,” he murmured. “In fact, if I can’t have you right now, I think it would kill me.”

“You can have me,” Severus said, his breathing growing quick and ragged. “I think it would kill me too if you don’t.” 

Remus grinned at that, the first smile Severus had seen since he’d arrived, and he grabbed Severus’ hand and pulled him urgently toward the bedroom. The big bed where they’d had sex so many times was rumpled, as though Remus did more tossing and turning in it than sleeping. 

“I can hardly believe you’re really here,” he murmured, cradling Severus’ cheek for a moment, his smile tender. Then he grasped the hem of Severus’ sweater and without further ado, he stripped it off, pulling it over Severus’ head.

Severus had a brief twinge of self-consciousness over his even scrawnier than usual chest, but Remus didn’t seem to mind, and that gave him the courage to reach out for the hem of Remus’ tee shirt in turn. 

“I’m here,” he murmured. “I’m not going anywhere.” 

“Good, because I’m averse to ever letting you out of my sight again.” Remus bent his head so that Severus could strip off his shirt, and then he unfastened his jeans, pushing them and his briefs down and off. He reached for the button of Severus’ jeans, licking his lips, his fingers trembling with eagerness and emotion. 

Severus wasted no time in toeing off his shoes and stripping off the rest of his clothes, not willing to wait to be undressed. He backed up until he reached the bed, and then he climbed on, beckoning to Remus. 

“Hurry,” he said huskily. “I need you.”

“How could I possibly resist?” Remus asked. He knelt on the bed and pounced, rolling Severus onto his back and pinning him down against the mattress. He bent his head, growling deep in his throat as he ran his nose along the column of Severus’ throat. Then he bit down on the tender skin just below Severus’ ear, hard enough to leave what Severus knew would be a livid bruise on his pale skin.

Moaning, Severus threw his head back and rested his arms above his head, his wrists crossed in a silent surrender; he’d lived on the memories of this for a year, and those memories had grown thin from overuse. He was scarcely able to believe this was real; he had feared the evening would go a different way altogether, and he was grateful beyond belief that Remus had given him this second chance so freely. He wouldn’t take it for granted, not ever again. 

“Then don’t resist,” he groaned, arching up wantonly against Remus. “Do whatever you want.” 

“Oh, I will,” Remus replied. He reached toward the bedside table, opening the drawer and pulling out a bottle of lube. Opening the top, he coated his fingers and pressed them against Severus’ opening. “I don’t know how long I can hold out, but I don’t want to hurt you.”

Squirming restlessly, Severus shook his head and scowled. “You won’t hurt me. Just use lots of lube and fuck me _now_ ,” he demanded. He was beyond the point of caring if it _did_ hurt; he needed to feel connected to Remus again more than anything, and desperation overruled all other considerations.

“You’re awful pushy for a bottom,” Remus said, smiling wickedly as he did as Severus asked, coating himself liberally with lube. Then he lifted Severus’ hips and positioned himself, and Severus spread his legs and rocked his hips up, their twin groans echoing in the room as Remus slowly sheathed himself in Severus’ eager body.

 _That_ was what Severus had been longing for, and he locked his legs around Remus’ hips, holding him in place; he felt whole again, body and heart, and with a soft cry, he captured Remus’ face between his hands and drew him down into a deep, hungry kiss, pouring all the longing he’d felt for the past year into it.

Remus returned the kiss with equal hunger, plundering Severus’ mouth as though he was a starving man and Severus was a sumptuous feast. Then he moaned and began to move, short, shallow thrusts as though he couldn’t hold still for a moment longer. Echoing Remus’ moans, Severus moved with him, wanting to feel Remus buried deep, wanting to feel Remus’ claim on him once more. 

Lifting his head with a gasp, Remus stared down at Severus, watch his face avidly. “I’m going to make you forget your own name,” he growled, grasping Severus’ hands and pinning them over his head. He pulled back, slightly, then thrust forward again, harder, then again, increasing the tempo as he pounded into Severus’ body.

Severus cried out with pleasure as Remus began taking him harder, just as he wanted, and he yielded completely, his body welcoming and pliant as Remus claimed him. With each thrust, his control and reserve crumbled a little more, turning him into a creature of pure need and desire, growing wilder beneath Remus as his arousal spiraled higher. 

Panting hard, Remus moved so that he was pinning both of Severus’ wrists with one hand, and then he thrust the other between their bodies, wrapping his fingers around Severus’ cock and stroking him in counterpoint to the movement of his hips. “My Severus, all mine,” he said fiercely. “You’re never leaving me again.”

“No, never,” Severus gasped, rocking with Remus desperately as need overtook him. “I’m yours.”

“Yes, you are,” Remus growled. “Now come for me!”

Severus was wound up too tightly to do anything but obey, and he shattered with a wild cry, coming undone completely beneath Remus. Remus watched intently, giving a moan of satisfaction as he watched Severus giving himself over to his release, and then he cried out Severus’ name as he too reached the pinnacle of pleasure.

Sated in ways he could scarcely articulate, Severus moaned and moved with Remus throughout the aftermath, wanting to prolong their union for as long as possible, and he kept his legs wrapped tightly around Remus’ hips, unwilling to let him go. 

Remus propped himself above Severus, seeming unwilling to move as well, and he leaned down to nuzzle Severus’ cheek tenderly. “That was incredible,” he said softly. “I don’t know how I’ve survive without you for an entire year.”

“Not very well, obviously,” Severus replied, running his palm along Remus’ side and feeling the jut of ribs and hip. “But things are different now. Better.” 

“Yes, they definitely are,” Remus said, smiling tenderly at him. He glanced back at Severus’ hand, then chuckled softly. “You still have my ring. I’d wondered if you’d tossed it away.”

“I haven’t taken it off,” Severus admitted quietly. “I thought it was the only part of you I’d ever have, and I couldn’t let it go.”

“I have a confession of my own to make,” Remus said, giving a somewhat sheepish smile. He pushed his hand beneath the pillow where Severus’ head rested and pulled out a dark green sweater that was immediately recognizable as one of Severus’. “It’s silly, but I’ve slept with it under my pillow all this time.”

Severus raised one eyebrow at Remus, but he couldn’t say anything disparaging; he was relieved to know Remus had wanted a connection to him, however slight, as well, and he could hardly throw any stones when he had kept Remus’ ring. 

“Well, you won’t have to make do with a mere sweater anymore,” he said, reaching up to stroke Remus’ cheek. 

“No, I won’t.” The smile which curved Remus’ lips held a wealth of joy, and then he moved, rolling to one side and pulling Severus into his arms, holding him close and tight. “I’m never letting you go again. You know how persistent I can be, and this time, I don’t care what you do or say, I’m sticking to you like glue.”

Severus moved into Remus’ arms willingly, feeling as if he was back where he belonged at last. “I don’t have a problem with that,” he murmured, nuzzling Remus’ throat. “In fact, I have a plan for the future - our future - if you agree to it.” 

“Oh?” Remus stroked Severus’ back, seeming unable to get enough of touching him. “And what might that be? So long as it involves us being together, I think I can be flexible.”

“As I mentioned before you started all this grabbing and kissing me nonsense,” Severus began, trying to sound aggrieved, “I intend to resign from the university at the end of the semester, and I’m moving to Asheville over the summer so I can begin my new job in the fall. I’m sure you remember me mentioning my friend, Regulus. He told me about an available position in his department. I applied, and...” He shrugged casually. “I got the job. He also said there would be at least one open adjunct position in the fall and suggested that you could work there as an adjunct until you finish your dissertation, and then you could apply for a tenure-track position, according to their partner hire policy, if you wanted to. If not, there are other schools within driving distance of Asheville to choose from.” 

Remus went still, his hand flat against Severus’ back. He pulled away just enough so that he could look into Severus’ eyes. “Is that what you really want?” he asked, his expression serious and intense. “You’ve thought about it, and this is what will truly make you happy?”

“I can’t stay here,” Severus replied, shaking his head firmly. “The atmosphere in the department is too toxic for me, and I can’t see that changing, thanks to Black’s influence. I spent the summer in Asheville, and I like it a great deal. The community is far more open and accepting of alternate lifestyles, and there are whole new areas of folklore for me to explore. We can always come back to the coast for visits, but yes, I’ve thought about it, and yes, this is what I want. I think a change is in order.” 

A tender smile curved Remus’ lips, and he cupped Severus’ cheek with one hand. “Then that’s what we’ll do,” he replied easily. “I’ll put this house on the market at once and start looking for a place in Asheville. I like the mountains, and the thought of having a job away from this place is welcome to me, too. But as long as you’ll be there, that’s all that really matters. My home is where you are, Severus. You are all I want and need to be truly happy.”

“I’ve got an appointment to look at some houses next week,” Severus said, trying to make the offer sound casual. “We could look together... perhaps for something we both like.”

“Perfect!” Remus smiled and gave Severus a smacking kiss to seal the deal. Then he chuckled. “Sounds like I owe your friend Regulus a great deal. In fact...” He turned and looked at the clock. “Ah, yes. If you are willing to accompany me, I have an appointment with Dumbledore later this afternoon. I think you will be very, very interested in what I have to say.”

“Oh, really?” Severus propped himself up on one elbow, regarding Remus curiously. “Why is that?”

Remus shook his head, his eyes gleaming with mischief. “Oh, no, I’m not about to spoil the surprise,” he said. “This is something that has to be seen, rather than told. Trust me, I have no doubt it will be worth the wait. And in the meantime... perhaps a shower? It might lead to us being dirty again, and I wouldn’t mind putting a few more marks on you, just so that my claim is obvious... to _everyone_.”

“I wouldn’t mind that either,” Severus replied, leaning in to steal a kiss. 

No doubt showing up in Dumbledore’s office with Remus would lead to his immediate dismissal, since it was a violation of his ‘probation’, but he didn’t care. The semester was almost over anyway, and he had a comfortable enough nest egg to see him through the summer until his contract at his new school took effect in August. In the meantime, he was tired of hiding, and he was tired of being separated from Remus, and he wasn’t going to put up with either condition any longer. 

“Let’s go,” he said, moving away from Remus and rolling out of bed. “I want to start making up for lost time.” 

Remus grinned, following Severus and groping his ass as they walked toward the bathroom. “It’s going to take a long time to make up for the last year,” he said, giving Severus a playful leer. “But I’m looking forward to it. A lot.”

Severus smirked and wriggled a bit, feeling lighter of spirit than he had in far too long. “So am I,” he said, already planning what he wanted to do with the soap. “Very much indeed.”

* * *

Two hours later, they were in Dumbledore’s office, and it was obvious that Dumbledore hadn’t been expecting Severus’ presence.

“You are in violation of our agreement - both of you,” he said warningly. “So why did you request this meeting, Mr. Lupin? I thought it might have something to do with your dissertation, but given Dr. Snape’s presence, I suspect that isn’t the case.”

“No, it isn’t,” Remus replied. He opened the messenger bag he’d picked up as he and Severus had left his house and withdrew a thick manila folder full of papers. “Certain things were brought to my attention by an anonymous source,” He paused here and winked at Severus, “and I decided to invest my own money to hire a private investigator to discover the truth of the matter. As it turns out, the allegations were true, and I’m here to present them to you. Although I have a condition.”

Dumbledore gave him a puzzled look. “A condition? I assume this concerns some wrongdoing, and you’re placing a condition on providing me with the information?”

“Yes.” Remus shrugged slightly, but he didn’t back down. “My condition is that Severus and I will be present when you confront the person or persons this is about.”

Dumbledore frowned slightly at that. “Disciplinary matters are handled privately. Unless the infraction involves you and Dr. Snape directly, I cannot allow you to be present.”

“As I recall, Severus’ discipline was supposedly private, and yet _somehow_ , word was spread not only all over this department, but all over the university and beyond as well,” Remus replied, giving Dumbledore a pointed look. “There is also the fact that Severus and I _are_ directly involved. The exposure of our relationship was deliberately done in order to draw attention away from a far worse infraction going on right under your nose.”

“Not to mention, it was part of an ongoing vendetta against me,” Severus muttered, folding his arms across his chest. He still had no idea what this was about, and he hadn’t been able to wheedle any information out of Remus no matter how persuasive he tried to be, both naked and clothed, but he wasn’t particularly interested in dredging up the past. 

“Believe me, I had words with Dr. Black,” Dumbledore said grimly. “I don’t appreciate having confidential matters turned into fodder for the gossip mill.” He sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Very well, you may be present. Now what exactly is this about?” 

Remus smiled wolfishly as he placed the folder in front of Dumbledore. “In there, you will find evidence which proves beyond a shadow of a doubt that Dr. Sirius Black is engaged in an illicit affair with his graduate assistant, Harry Potter. I warn you that some of the photos are rather... graphic in nature, but I specified to the investigator that he was to be very thorough in his efforts to prove the allegations. Now considering that Mr. Potter is twenty years younger than Dr. Black _and_ continues to take his courses, and that Dr. Black deliberately sacrificed a coworker’s career and reputation solely for the selfish purpose of covering up his own illicit activities, I would hope that your punishment would be severe. Very severe indeed.”

Dumbledore’s eyes grew wide and round behind his glasses as he sifted through the mountain of evidence, and Severus could see the color draining from his face. Severus was more than a little shocked himself; he knew Black had Peter Pan issues on top of being blindly envious of anyone he perceived as being a threat to his precious ego, but he’d never imagined Black capable of _this_. He’d never believed in karma or any other form of cosmic justice before, but he was beginning to rethink his position in light of all this. 

“This...” Dumbledore shook his head, seeming at an utter loss for words. “This is unconscionable.”

“I do believe that it makes a consensual relationship between a professor and a graduate student who was practically ABD seem minor by comparison,” Remus agreed, apparently quite willing to rub Dumbledore’s nose in his part in Black’s scheme. “Given the disparity in their positions and the fact that Mr. Potter is barely beyond legal adulthood, well... hypocrisy is an ugly business, isn’t it? Especially when someone uses the very rules they are breaking themselves in order to ruin a colleague.”

“Don’t get too self-righteous, Mr. Lupin,” Dumbledore said, fixing him with a stern look. “I am sympathetic to your situation, and I do think the spirit rather than the letter of the law should apply in your case, but you were both still in violation of the policy despite the differences in your situation and this one. That said...” He rubbed the side of his face, looking older and inexplicably sad. “I cannot soften this blow, and under the circumstances, I’m not certain I would want to, even if I could.” 

Remus didn’t seem at all fazed by Dumbledore’s warning, nor did he seem at all sympathetic to Black and Potter. “Black cost me an entire year of being separated from the man I love, while carrying on his own illicit affair,” he said harshly. “Pardon me if my ability to feel sympathy for him is limited.”

“I understand, of course.” Dumbledore gathered the documents and stacked them neatly, and he looked between the two of them. “However, I must have your word that you won’t disrupt the proceedings when I speak with Dr. Black. _Both_ of you,” he added, looking pointedly at Severus. “No outbursts, or you will have to leave. This is obviously a volatile situation, and I will not allow it to escalate into a shouting match or worse.”

Lifting a brow at Severus, Remus smiled grimly. “I’m fine with that, if you are. Unlike what happened to us, at least Black will get to face his accuser. I just want to see his face, and I want him to _know_ it was me. Well... with a little help from your friend Regulus and a good PI.”

“Regulus has been damned busy arranging my life lately,” Severus muttered, shaking his head. He would have been annoyed, but so far, his friend’s meddling had all worked in Severus’ favor. Raising his voice, he added, “I don’t have a problem with it either. I’m content to let the evidence speak for itself without adding my two cents.”

“Very well, then.” Dumbledore nodded and then picked up his phone to instruct his assistant to send for Black. 

In a matter of minutes, Black knocked and entered, the curiosity in his expression shifting to suspicion and anger when he looked around and saw Severus and Remus in the room. “What’s this about?” he demanded. 

Dumbledore said nothing in response; instead, he simply placed one of the tamer photographs on his desk facing Black. 

All the color drained from Black’s face, and he sputtered, a wild look in his eyes as he tried to come up with an explanation. “Where did you get this?” he asked finally, turning to glare at Severus. “Is there an accusation being leveled against me?”

“I would think the accusation is clear enough,” Dumbledore said coolly. “But I have more evidence here, if you want to see it,” he added, tapping the stack of documentation. 

Black’s face flushed and his features twisted into something ugly. “You did this on purpose!” he said, pointing a finger at Severus.

Severus held up both hands and shook his head. “I had nothing to do with it,” he replied, although he didn’t bother to hide the fact that he was enjoying watching Black squirm. “I’m merely a spectator.” He paused, unable to resist twisting the knife a bit. “I certainly didn’t have anything to do with your decision to fuck your barely-legal grad students.” 

If looks could have killed, Severus would have been dead on the floor from the ugly, hate-filled glare he gave Severus. It was obvious that he didn’t believe a word of it, and apparently he must have dismissed Remus as being too ineffectual to have planned such a thing - which showed just how little Black really knew. 

But Black drew himself up and put on something of the haughty demeanor of his family as he turned to face Dumbledore. “Fine, there is no point in denying that Harry and I are in a relationship,” he said, giving a shrug that was supposed to be nonchalant but somehow fell short. “I suppose that my punishment will be no worse that _his_.” He didn’t even bother to say Severus’ name, merely jerking his head in Severus’ general direction. “I take it I’m on probation and will have to do extra service? Fine. I can live with that.”

Dumbledore folded his hands on his desk and regarded Black gravely. “I’m afraid it isn’t as simple as that,” he said. “You violated the same policy as Dr. Snape, yes, but whether you became involved with Mr. Potter before or after you reported Dr. Snape’s activities doesn’t matter. Either way, you have been deceitful and hypocritical in besmirching Dr. Snape’s reputation while engaging in the same behavior for which you have vilified him. That is not the kind of model we want our faculty to present to our students.” 

Black looked as though Dumbledore had struck him, and his hands clenched into fists at his sides. “What are you saying, then?” he asked hoarsely. “What are you planning on doing with me?”

“I’m saying that your tenure will be revoked, and your employment here will be at an end,” Dumbledore replied. “I suggest that you avoid drawing so many lines in the sand between yourself and your colleagues and fomenting an atmosphere of conflict if you secure another position elsewhere.” 

“You’re going to ruin me!” The words were torn from Black in an anguished cry. “You can’t do this! No one will hire me!” He shot Severus another hate-filled glance, then turned back to Dumbledore, his voice almost pleading. “At least let me resign instead!”

“As long as your resignation is effective immediately,” Dumbledore replied. 

Oddly enough, Severus was satisfied. At one point, he might have preferred to have Black’s perfidy shouted from the rooftops, but at this point, he was already distanced from this place and from Black’s game-playing enough that he didn’t feel as deeply invested as he used to. He had a new life ahead of him, one he was anticipating, and he was more than ready to leave all this behind. 

“It is.” Black’s voice was flat and wooden, and there was an almost forlorn look to his face. He dropped his gaze, and then he turned and left the room without a backwards glance, apparently too dispirited to even spare a final glance for Severus, whom it was obvious he blamed for all his woes.

Beside him, Remus sighed and reached out to take Severus’ hand, holding it and squeezing tightly. “It’s over,” he murmured, his voice pitched for Severus’ ears alone. “He failed. In everything, especially in keeping us apart. That’s all that really matters, right?”

Severus curled his fingers around Remus’ and squeezed them in return. “Yes, it is.” 

“There is the little matter of you violating the terms of our agreement,” Dumbledore said sternly, and Severus looked at him and shrugged. 

“I quit,” he said easily. 

Remus chuckled at that and headed for the door, tugging Severus along with him. “I have another year or two to finish up my dissertation, but I won’t be teaching here any longer, Professor Dumbledore,” he said. “Apparently there are universities with slightly more open minds out there, so I think I’ll go looking for one of those.”

Dumbledore nodded somberly. “I am sorry to lose so many valued members of this department at one time,” he said. “But I understand your decision, and I wish you both the best of luck in your new endeavors.” 

“Thank you,” Severus replied, feeling no regret, only relief at making his departure official. “I’ll get my office cleaned out this week and be on my way.” 

“Give Minerva my warm regards.” Dumbledore arched one eyebrow and gave him a knowing look, and Severus snorted. It figured word would travel fast! 

“I will,” he said blandly. 

Remus nodded to Dumbledore, and then, still holding Severus’ hand, he walked out. He waited until they were out of the main office before pulling Severus close and hugging him, apparently not caring about who else might be around to see.

“That turned out even better than I’d hoped,” he said, holding Severus tightly. “And I’m so glad you were here to see it. Thank you for not waiting even another day to come to me.”

Severus slid his arms around Remus’ waist, relieved that the veil of secrecy had been lifted. With Black leaving in disgrace - and he had no doubt the reason why would leak somehow, perhaps with a little help from a certain meddler back in Asheville - Black’s supporters who had scorned Severus would find themselves in an uncomfortable position, which meant they wouldn’t dare try to cause trouble for Remus now. 

“I’m glad too, but if I’d missed it...” He shrugged insouciantly. “Seeing Black brought down would have given me tremendous joy once upon a time. Now, though, it doesn’t matter. I finally figured out what’s really important, and that’s a better kind of victory.”

“I know what you mean,” Remus said, leaning in to give Severus a brief, hard kiss. “I thought when I woke up this morning that the only thing the day would bring would be a kind of hollow victory over the author of my misery, but having you back... that’s all that really matters. I’m glad Black was punished, if for no other reason than perhaps he won’t try this with anyone else, but I’d have given it all up if it had meant you were mine again.” He smiled at Severus in a manner that was completely besotted. “You are mine, right? Forever and ever? Because if this is our particular little folktale, I want to give it a happy ending.”

Severus rolled his eyes and snorted, but it was perfunctory at best. “Yes, yes, yes. They all lived happily ever after until the end of their days, except for Black, who was miserable and got eaten by a bear or suffered some other suitably horrific fairytale fate. Does that suit you?” 

“It suits me just fine,” Remus replied. “Just fine indeed.”

“Good.” Severus nodded with satisfaction. “Then let’s clean out my office so we can get out of here for good. We have a lifelong story to start writing.”

Remus nodded, then his eyes flashed with unholy glee. “Is the bottle of lube still in your bottom right-hand drawer?”

“Yes... Why?” Severus asked, although he suspected he already knew the answer. 

Remus leaned close to whisper in Severus’ ear. “Because I want to shag you on the desk again... and I want Black to hear every moment of it. Do you like the sound of that?”

For a moment, Severus hesitated. The walls weren’t that thick or that well insulated, and if Black heard, no doubt others would too. But then again, he was leaving, so he supposed it didn’t much matter. 

“What the hell,” he said with a shrug. “I might as well give them something to remember me by.” 

“That’s the spirit!” Remus said, then he stepped back, chuckling, and took Severus’ hand. “Maybe you can go out with a bang AND a whimper!”

And that, Severus thought, made an excellent ending to this particular chapter of his life.

-end-


End file.
